3yo not learning as much in daycare, move or keep for comfort?

[Anonymous]

My DS is very shy but advanced verbally and super smart for his age. His daycare is great, loving, and he's used to all the people there, but he's not learning new things. For example, when I get his little report card, it talks about how they're working on knowing the first letter of their name, but he already knows how to spell.

Should I be moving him to a place that will challenge him more or keep him for comfort? He's fairly shy so I don't want to disrupt things too much. Also, his card always says he "content" but he's not jumping around happy like he is at home or with his cousins.

I'm a FTM and really just want to do what's best for him but I have no idea what that is. Any insight much appreciated!

[Anonymous]

You're reading too much into this. He's 3. Maybe he is advanced but you also have to worry about his socialization, which is actually the more critical need for this age group. If he's happy, then stay the course.

[Anonymous]

Play is learning at three

[Anonymous]

already knows how to spell what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS is very shy but advanced verbally and super smart for his age. His daycare is great, loving, and he's used to all the people there, but he's not learning new things. For example, when I get his little report card, it talks about how they're working on knowing the first letter of their name, but he already knows how to spell.

Should I be moving him to a place that will challenge him more or keep him for comfort? He's fairly shy so I don't want to disrupt things too much. Also, his card always says he "content" but he's not jumping around happy like he is at home or with his cousins.

I'm a FTM and really just want to do what's best for him but I have no idea what that is. Any insight much appreciated!

Would highly suggest putting you advanced child in a NAEYC accredited preschool. I would ensure that they have a curriculum, while play based, doesn't mean they just "play all day" but that they are engaged. If the preschool cannot demonstrate it has a true curriculum, you are at a daycare, not a preschool. And before anyone decides to say "A NAEYC accredited preschool doesn't mean they are of a higher caliber" please go to the NEAYC site and look at the difficulty for a preschool to get accredited. It's not just about money for the accreditation, it's about being able to prove you have a high quality preschool program over many facets of programming- highly accredited staff, high quality curriculum, a lot of engagement of staff with students and parents, etc..

As a parent that also wanted the best for my children, that is the direction I went and it has served them tremendously in elementary school.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s absurd to equate spelling and letters as “learning” for a three year old. To me, what I want to see my 3 year old learning is:

Social skills
Sharing/taking turns
Patience
Using a fork and spoon well
Cleaning up after themselves
Wiping spills
Climbing, running, jumping
Fine motor control
Problem solving
Potty training
Washing hands thoroughly
Wiping
Using kind words
Manners - please, thank you, greeting people
Taking on and off shoes, sweaters, and coats
Pouring
Eating and drinking neatly with minimal mess and spills
Consent - everyone is in charge of their own body
Cutting with scissors
“Reading” comprehension - can he answer basic questions about a story after it’s been read to him.
Handling big emotions
Listening

How’s he doing on that stuff? Those are the foundational skills he needs at this age, not spelling!

[Anonymous]

If you want academics find a preschool that does that in addition to play and life skills and also has a daycare component, not a daycare that might or doesn't have an academic component.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s absurd to equate spelling and letters as “learning” for a three year old. To me, what I want to see my 3 year old learning is:

Social skills
Sharing/taking turns
Patience
Using a fork and spoon well
Cleaning up after themselves
Wiping spills
Climbing, running, jumping
Fine motor control
Problem solving
Potty training
Washing hands thoroughly
Wiping
Using kind words
Manners - please, thank you, greeting people
Taking on and off shoes, sweaters, and coats
Pouring
Eating and drinking neatly with minimal mess and spills
Consent - everyone is in charge of their own body
Cutting with scissors
“Reading” comprehension - can he answer basic questions about a story after it’s been read to him.
Handling big emotions
Listening

How’s he doing on that stuff? Those are the foundational skills he needs at this age, not spelling!

+1 although I think 3 is a bit early for scissors. Knowing your letters at 3 is nice but not as important as learning social and motor skills.

[Anonymous]

Agree with above posters. OP everyone thinks their 3yo kids are smart. Not saying yours isn’t but thete is a huge range at this age. If he’s happy I’d leave him there.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks all. This is helpful. FWIW, my child can also do all the things listed in the list above and we place as much importance on social skills as we do "academic". I know I could be overthinking this so it's helpful to hear the responses and know leaving my child where he's at is fine

[Anonymous]

A lot of families like Montessori for preschool and K. A few vocal people here on DCUM hate Montessori.

The term "Montessori" is not trademarked, so any school can say it is Montessori. This means there is wide variation from one Montessori school to another. Most such schools teach Practical Life skills (gross motor, fine motor, drawing, coloring, pouring) but also expose kids to letters, numbers, and Phonics.

I would suggest looking at Montessori schools near you. See if you think they are a good fit for your DC or not.

[Anonymous]

Go visit some other options. It’s not so much the academics, but some teachers/preschools just offer more in terms of interesting activities and variety, and he might like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go visit some other options. It’s not so much the academics, but some teachers/preschools just offer more in terms of interesting activities and variety, and he might like that.

A good Reggio preschool (one with an emergent curriculum that follow’s the class’ interests) could be a nice fit. They can go in depth on topics, which gives them more organic opportunities for academic skills

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS is very shy but advanced verbally and super smart for his age. His daycare is great, loving, and he's used to all the people there, but he's not learning new things. For example, when I get his little report card, it talks about how they're working on knowing the first letter of their name, but he already knows how to spell.

Should I be moving him to a place that will challenge him more or keep him for comfort? He's fairly shy so I don't want to disrupt things too much. Also, his card always says he "content" but he's not jumping around happy like he is at home or with his cousins.

I'm a FTM and really just want to do what's best for him but I have no idea what that is. Any insight much appreciated!

Would highly suggest putting you advanced child in a NAEYC accredited preschool. I would ensure that they have a curriculum, while play based, doesn't mean they just "play all day" but that they are engaged. If the preschool cannot demonstrate it has a true curriculum, you are at a daycare, not a preschool. And before anyone decides to say "A NAEYC accredited preschool doesn't mean they are of a higher caliber" please go to the NEAYC site and look at the difficulty for a preschool to get accredited. It's not just about money for the accreditation, it's about being able to prove you have a high quality preschool program over many facets of programming- highly accredited staff, high quality curriculum, a lot of engagement of staff with students and parents, etc..

As a parent that also wanted the best for my children, that is the direction I went and it has served them tremendously in elementary school.

This is ridiculous advice and please don’t follow it. Go to the accredited preschool but not because you’re concerned about your 3 year old’s academics.

[Anonymous]

The biggest red flag I see here is that your current preschool gives out report cards. Although I guess ours did too but it had zero academic content on the sheet. It was about skills.