Go back and forth between disgust/upset and acceptance/confident with my body

[Anonymous]

I’m female, 41 years old, 5’11, and 230 pounds. I’m heavy all over and about 80 pounds than I was when I got married 12 years ago.

Some days I feel beautiful, thinner than the majority of Americans, and put together.

Other days, I’m looking up supplements and more programs, weight loss surgery etc to lose the weight. I avoid mirrors and photos, and I hide.

Not sure what version is the real me.

Anyone else go through this?

[Anonymous]

You need therapy ASAP. You are experiencing manic behavior.

[Anonymous]

You are classified as obese, which is like 1/3 of Americans so you are probably thinner than lots of people you see. However it’s unlikely you are healthy at that weight. Are you interested in trying to lose weight for a month and see how you feel?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are classified as obese, which is like 1/3 of Americans so you are probably thinner than lots of people you see. However it’s unlikely you are healthy at that weight. Are you interested in trying to lose weight for a month and see how you feel?

Losing weight in a month is a sure fire way to gain it all back and then some.

You need a life long plan. Find a doctor and nutritionist to lose the weight and maintain it. A therapist or a support group. You need to figure out your triggers and if you can handle with control or need to avoid completely.

Weight loss should not be seen as a quick fix. You need supportive people around you. Ie if you don't want donuts your spouse will respect that and won't buy them or eat them in front of you.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m female, 41 years old, 5’11, and 230 pounds. I’m heavy all over and about 80 pounds than I was when I got married 12 years ago.

Some days I feel beautiful, thinner than the majority of Americans, and put together.

Other days, I’m looking up supplements and more programs, weight loss surgery etc to lose the weight. I avoid mirrors and photos, and I hide.

Not sure what version is the real me.

Anyone else go through this?

I don't understand why you can't accept your current body and also decide to become healthier. For example, I accept my current body but I wish I was better at tennis. So I'm going to practice and get at it. Maybe you can do something similar, i.e. like having a goal of eating more vegetables or exercising more. No need to hate yourself while trying to improve.

[Anonymous]

No, I can't relate. I feel every day like I am on the slightly heavier side of average, which, based on my stats, is true.

[Anonymous]

You need to lose weight ASAP. You're gonna die of a heart attack

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m female, 41 years old, 5’11, and 230 pounds. I’m heavy all over and about 80 pounds than I was when I got married 12 years ago.

Some days I feel beautiful, thinner than the majority of Americans, and put together.

Other days, I’m looking up supplements and more programs, weight loss surgery etc to lose the weight. I avoid mirrors and photos, and I hide.

Not sure what version is the real me.

Anyone else go through this?

In now way are you thinner than the majority of Americans. I mean you are tall so maybe you carry it well but 230 pounds is a lot!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to lose weight ASAP. You're gonna die of a heart attack

Op needs to do it in a slow way. Quick diet/yo-yo diets are also bad for your health

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m female, 41 years old, 5’11, and 230 pounds. I’m heavy all over and about 80 pounds than I was when I got married 12 years ago.

Some days I feel beautiful, thinner than the majority of Americans, and put together.

Other days, I’m looking up supplements and more programs, weight loss surgery etc to lose the weight. I avoid mirrors and photos, and I hide.

Not sure what version is the real me.

Anyone else go through this?

I don't understand why you can't accept your current body and also decide to become healthier. For example, I accept my current body but I wish I was better at tennis. So I'm going to practice and get at it. Maybe you can do something similar, i.e. like having a goal of eating more vegetables or exercising more. No need to hate yourself while trying to improve.

I love this advice. I spent a year with a dietician working on changing both thoughts, behaviors, and diet. I lost 20ish pounds working with her and another 15ish after our time together ended. We never focused on weight loss; it just kind of happened as a result of the work we did together. Small goals go a long way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m female, 41 years old, 5’11, and 230 pounds. I’m heavy all over and about 80 pounds than I was when I got married 12 years ago.

Some days I feel beautiful, thinner than the majority of Americans, and put together.

Other days, I’m looking up supplements and more programs, weight loss surgery etc to lose the weight. I avoid mirrors and photos, and I hide.

Not sure what version is the real me.

Anyone else go through this?

I don't understand why you can't accept your current body and also decide to become healthier. For example, I accept my current body but I wish I was better at tennis. So I'm going to practice and get at it. Maybe you can do something similar, i.e. like having a goal of eating more vegetables or exercising more. No need to hate yourself while trying to improve.

Lovely, you phrased this perfectly.

[Anonymous]

Ok I love that you (at times) love your body. I’m confused how you ever think you’re thinner than the majority of Americans though at 230 lbs

[Anonymous]

I feel this way OP, and I am 5’8 and 145, so normal weight. Body dysmorphia. I am always surprised when I see myself in photos. I either look fat or thin—no in between.

[Anonymous]

Your goal shouldn’t be to look better than other people, but to be the best version of YOU. Start taking steps towards that goal. Today, eat an extra vegetable. Tomorrow drink more water. Keep moving in a healthier direction.

[Anonymous]

Yes I used to! I dealt with it for years. But then I signed for Noom and lost the weight. I've kept it off for 3 years. It's so much better this way.