Sporty families bragging about offers and committing to awful colleges in the middle of nowhere?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like seeing the announcements, I'm very happy for all of these kids and their families.

In fact I'd rather see these announcements for "awful colleges in the middle of nowhere" than the ones bragging about their kids committing to Michigan, UVA, whatever other schools OP mentioned.

You are as bad as OP. Why can't parents post on their social media page where their kid is going to college? They are excited. Live and let live. OP doesn't want "crappy" schools and you don't want better schools. It's a big benchmark for these kids, and their parents, let them enjoy the moment.

It’s not just a single, brief post about where the kiddo is going to college. For literally 10 years these travel sports parents have bragged and posted every single event, check-ins, hundreds of pictures with trophies and medals, and humble bragging about Larla and Lincoln’s top 3 finishes. They whispered to anyone in earshot their kiddo was getting looks from Ivies and maybe D1s, whatever the case, “playing at the next level” was assured ... so when the kiddo ends up at a backwater LAC you’ve never heard of, it’s puzzling. And they always seem to announce this with a 300 word brag post filled with “blessed” and “all the sacrifice was worth it.” We never get the posts letting us know Larla quit the sport after her freshman year.

So they spent ten years being proud of their kid and thought their kid might even get into an Ivy, and you're upset that they are still proud of their kid when the Ivy didn't work out? Should they be ashamed of their kid because the Ivy didn't work out and stop posting how proud they feel? I think it's great they are proud of their kid even when they don't get the top prize. Ever heard of unconditional love?

[Anonymous]

Op is a nasty one. MYOB. I went to the VERY best schools. My husband went to podunk crapsville college. Because of his hustle, he’s much more successful than my fancy classmates. There is a lot more to life than where you go to college. Athletes often have grit & hustle that the smug dweebs do not.

[Anonymous]

OP's kid was clearly bad at sports and OP resented it and is now trying to take some shameful joy arising from the fact that kids on the child's team kept playing sports and some went to college to do so. Nothing more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op is a nasty one. MYOB. I went to the VERY best schools. My husband went to podunk crapsville college. Because of his hustle, he’s much more successful than my fancy classmates. There is a lot more to life than where you go to college. Athletes often have grit & hustle that the smug dweebs do not.

you mean smug dweebs like yourself.

[Anonymous]

I was a student athlete.

It’s a great experience. It’s hard. It’s rewarding. I wouldn’t say there are perks. But it’s a completely different experience than not playing a sport and the way it’s set up—some kids are benefiting greatly. And I can see this being true at any level. Although the really small schools will have less resources of course. But it’s still about the same.

That all being said. I see parents thinking they are making this huge sacrifice for 10+ years and IT IS NOT WORTH IT. It is not worth all the money and time for what I stated above.

For it to be worth it the kid needs to make more sacrifices than the parents. The kid needs to want it. It needs to come naturally. Otherwise, the parents are not getting the return on investment. Trust me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op is a nasty one. MYOB. I went to the VERY best schools. My husband went to podunk crapsville college. Because of his hustle, he’s much more successful than my fancy classmates. There is a lot more to life than where you go to college. Athletes often have grit & hustle that the smug dweebs do not.

When you call people out for not being nice maybe try to set a good example and don’t refer to other people as “smug dweebs”.
People bring lots of strengths to the work place. A successful student athlete with good grades has demonstrated good time management, self discipline and if they are in a team sport, the ability to work with others. It is ignorant to suggest that a non athlete is one dimensional and could not demonstrate the same skills and point to a similar experience. I know lots of students who have intense and compelling extra curricular activities that are not sports related

[Anonymous]

Not a fan of OP’s approach but I’ve certainly encountered the “junior’s talking to Princeton” smugness that generally doesn’t result in junior going to Princeton. I usually find it funny but occasionally grating, and in the latter case I’ll admit to a teeny weeny little bit of satisfaction when it goes sideways. I’ve also encountered kids making college choices almost exclusively on the sport, which seems like a terrible idea.

But many of these kids really want to have that college sports experience and the instant friend group it provides. I’d also argue that while OP may never have heard of the schools in question it might be a dream school for that kid. When my daughter says Colby or Kenyon, two she really likes and where she’s hoping to play sports, she gets the who/what/where look. I’m sure those people think we are just trying to justify all the sports time and expense but it simply isn’t true.

[Anonymous]

I understand parental pride when their kid is recruited and gets into any tie of college. But you have to understand that when you gloat about this to other parents whose kids may better or as qualified for school X and don't get in, it's not appreciated. Of course you can share with friends, but the crowing that i see at parties and random run ins at the grocery store etc are tasteless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was a student athlete.

It’s a great experience. It’s hard. It’s rewarding. I wouldn’t say there are perks. But it’s a completely different experience than not playing a sport and the way it’s set up—some kids are benefiting greatly. And I can see this being true at any level. Although the really small schools will have less resources of course. But it’s still about the same.

That all being said. I see parents thinking they are making this huge sacrifice for 10+ years and IT IS NOT WORTH IT. It is not worth all the money and time for what I stated above.

For it to be worth it the kid needs to make more sacrifices than the parents. The kid needs to want it. It needs to come naturally. Otherwise, the parents are not getting the return on investment. Trust me.

You treat this like its an investment but for many kids, like my own (some of whom were recruited and played in college, some of whom weren’t and didn’t), they ENJOYED playing. It was for the joy and the friendships. So odd how few people seem to get that. Yes it was expensive and sometimes a pain (“New Jersey?? We have to go to New Jersey this weekend???”) I certainly whined to my wife about it from time to time but the kids loved it and that always mattered most. And when they didn’t they said ‘I’m done’ and we stopped. College recruiting didn’t enter our minds until they were in high school and nearly done with club sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, mind your own business. You are horribly judgmental.

This.

Go away snob.

[Anonymous]

There are many student athletes who straight up quit the first year. Your child has to absolutely live for that sport 24/7 and not want to get an insanely tough BA degree. Even D3 schools make it hard with labs. And on top of every day 2-3 hour practices and your own classes, you have mandatory study sessions, team meetings, etc... Your weekends are traveling or playing, never relaxing or socializing. There is not much time for other clubs and college outings. It isn’t a one season sport either. Even D3 plays Fall and Spring. Winter workouts with team captains in winter.

My daughter chose an engineering degree at a college she loved over playing her sport D3 in a few colleges she wasn’t crazy about. And it was hard meeting teams/coaches she loved, but wasn’t crazy about the school. Or finding a great school and not jiving with the team. She ended up at a top engineering school and plays her club sport and IM co-ed volleyball. It is the best of both worlds. And event makes a very tight schedule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand parental pride when their kid is recruited and gets into any tie of college. But you have to understand that when you gloat about this to other parents whose kids may better or as qualified for school X and don't get in, it's not appreciated. Of course you can share with friends, but the crowing that i see at parties and random run ins at the grocery store etc are tasteless.

So what is really chapping your hide is that these people don't realize that your kid is better than their kid? You are really insecure. When someone tells me good news about their kid, my reaction is "Awesome!" I'm not mentally ranking their kid and whether or not my kid is "better" than their kid. They have an awesome kid. I have an awesome kid. It's not a competition. We're all excited about our kids moving into the next stage of their life. It's fun to hear happy news about other people's kids. It makes me happy that they are doing well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are many student athletes who straight up quit the first year. Your child has to absolutely live for that sport 24/7 and not want to get an insanely tough BA degree. Even D3 schools make it hard with labs. And on top of every day 2-3 hour practices and your own classes, you have mandatory study sessions, team meetings, etc... Your weekends are traveling or playing, never relaxing or socializing. There is not much time for other clubs and college outings. It isn’t a one season sport either. Even D3 plays Fall and Spring. Winter workouts with team captains in winter.

My daughter chose an engineering degree at a college she loved over playing her sport D3 in a few colleges she wasn’t crazy about. And it was hard meeting teams/coaches she loved, but wasn’t crazy about the school. Or finding a great school and not jiving with the team. She ended up at a top engineering school and plays her club sport and IM co-ed volleyball. It is the best of both worlds. And event makes a very tight schedule.

...for her. Many others love their colleges and their sports experience. Many other factual errors above but you don’t seem willing to listen so whatever.

[Anonymous]

I have a 2 very athletic children, 1 not so sporty, and the 1 athletes eventually went D1, could have easily done D3.

By proximity we have a very large amount of friends who are in the same situation.

One thing I learned going through the process is that parents with non-sporty kids can not contain their jealousy.

Each of us tries our hardest to only talk to each other about the commitment process and playing in college. Our true friends are happy for us and a few just very nice wonderful people, but generally there is a ton of vitriol around athletic recruits.

I advise parents of up and coming athletes to only talk to parents in a similar situation and every time they branch out, they feel the hate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand parental pride when their kid is recruited and gets into any tie of college. But you have to understand that when you gloat about this to other parents whose kids may better or as qualified for school X and don't get in, it's not appreciated. Of course you can share with friends, but the crowing that i see at parties and random run ins at the grocery store etc are tasteless.

This is a very truthful post.

Most people feel this way. They feel their kid (or somebody else with higher test scores) should have your child's spot. They feel you have cheated the system. They don't believe your child deserves the spot they have.

They do not want to hear that your child has talents that are (in the eyes of the school) better than their kids. They feel like, as a parent, they did everything right with their kid and you cheated them out of "what they deserved".

It's weird to me and bizarre, but this is how most people feel. (Since <10% of the population are athletes)

They do NOT want to hear that your child is successful because they feel cheated.