How can I get my child interested in a science major

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

She's auditioned for her dance studio's competition team for the last 8 years and hasn't made it, she's even auditioned at other places including one in NYC I mentioned earlier and got rejected. I just don't think she's cut out for that field professionally.

OP, you have a daughter who loves dance. Even though you think she shouldn't. Even though you don't think she's any good. Either you deal with this reality, or you don't. It's your choice.

It's possible to love doing something and not be good enough at it to make a living off of it. Think about all the sports fanatics out there who would love to play professionally but are aware that they don't have the ability to do so. It sounds as though Op is being a realist. Her daughter at the very least needs a backup plan.

"How can I get my child interested in a science major" is not the question of a realist.

Lol - that is true enough. Op's daughter needs to consider her own strengths and decide on a backup plan based on those strengths and interests.

OP's daughter did exactly that; read the earlier posts. The DD wants to combine dance teaching with a possible catering/culinary career. But that too doesn't sound lucrative enough to OP. OP seems to believe that STEM and STEM alone will provide the lifestyle OP wants for DD, despite posts to the contrary here. Advice here from a professional dance educator and others recommending how business classes etc. can add protection and practicality to DD's plans are falling on deaf ears. OP came here seeking validation for her own plan to steer her kid in one direction only.

Sadly, I wonder if OP will be back on here in about two years posting about how OP is baffled at DD's reaction to being told there's no money for college unless DD goes to her parents' chosen college and does the major they choose for her.

[Anonymous]

The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

That would have been useful information to provide. A question like "how can I help my child think about career paths that fit her strengths and her interests" would probably have provided more helpful responses. With an aptitude for science but a love for dance, I'm back to something like physical therapy with an aim of working with dancers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

This is the first time you've mentioned that.

I'm the STEM PhD who posted a while back, and all I can say is that this thread is very eye opening in terms of how parents think today (my kids are still very young). I view the job of parenting as trying to help kids be independent and learn how to make good choices. Your kid is 16; how many people end up doing the thing they were planning to do when they were that age? Stop assuming that she has to make every decision about her life now, and instead get her thinking productively about *how* to make life decisions. Get her involved in your household budget so she can understand how much various lifestyles cost. Talk to her about what kind of lifestyle she wants etc. Encourage her to research all of the ways that she could couple her interests and strengths (one of the smartest people I know loves sports and is a renowned bio-mechanical engineer who studies how athletes move).

But don't pick her career for her or assume you know what the right decision is for her. People change as they grow, and the careers of the future are going to look nothing like today's. People will be changing jobs and sectors frequently, and resilience and creativity will be at least as important as book knowledge. Give her the tools to successfully chart and cut her own path; you will never be able to lay it all down for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

She's auditioned for her dance studio's competition team for the last 8 years and hasn't made it, she's even auditioned at other places including one in NYC I mentioned earlier and got rejected. I just don't think she's cut out for that field professionally.

OP, you have a daughter who loves dance. Even though you think she shouldn't. Even though you don't think she's any good. Either you deal with this reality, or you don't. It's your choice.

It's possible to love doing something and not be good enough at it to make a living off of it. Think about all the sports fanatics out there who would love to play professionally but are aware that they don't have the ability to do so. It sounds as though Op is being a realist. Her daughter at the very least needs a backup plan.

"How can I get my child interested in a science major" is not the question of a realist.

Lol - that is true enough. Op's daughter needs to consider her own strengths and decide on a backup plan based on those strengths and interests.

OP's daughter did exactly that; read the earlier posts. The DD wants to combine dance teaching with a possible catering/culinary career. But that too doesn't sound lucrative enough to OP. OP seems to believe that STEM and STEM alone will provide the lifestyle OP wants for DD, despite posts to the contrary here. Advice here from a professional dance educator and others recommending how business classes etc. can add protection and practicality to DD's plans are falling on deaf ears. OP came here seeking validation for her own plan to steer her kid in one direction only.

Sadly, I wonder if OP will be back on here in about two years posting about how OP is baffled at DD's reaction to being told there's no money for college unless DD goes to her parents' chosen college and does the major they choose for her.

I missed the thing about culinary school. It does sound as though the kid has a plan for herself.

STEM is not for everybody and those who think it is are in for a rude awakening. I would not push a kid, who was not already interested in science/math, into pursuing a STEM major.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

What science classes has she taken?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

I echoing my parents' and my own choices. They went STEM and I went STEM because all related disciplines we're easy A in hard classes. No passion for STEM at all (mom wanted to do theater, dad loves sports). It was an easy way to earn a decent living. Fast forward: my parents switched carriers in late 40s. I wanted to run a restaurant, but got my graduate and post graduate STEM degrees. I am bartending now, I couldn't go to the office anymore, was dreading every single day and hated even weekends, because Monday was coming. Job was extremely easy, was lots fun and exciting things, lots new development, but I hated the environment, hated the new influx of drone like H1B and recent robot like graduates from top schools (the last part was the last straw: what was done by one or two people before became a team project).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

This is the first time you've mentioned that.

I'm the STEM PhD who posted a while back, and all I can say is that this thread is very eye opening in terms of how parents think today (my kids are still very young). I view the job of parenting as trying to help kids be independent and learn how to make good choices. Your kid is 16; how many people end up doing the thing they were planning to do when they were that age? Stop assuming that she has to make every decision about her life now, and instead get her thinking productively about *how* to make life decisions. Get her involved in your household budget so she can understand how much various lifestyles cost. Talk to her about what kind of lifestyle she wants etc. Encourage her to research all of the ways that she could couple her interests and strengths (one of the smartest people I know loves sports and is a renowned bio-mechanical engineer who studies how athletes move).

But don't pick her career for her or assume you know what the right decision is for her. People change as they grow, and the careers of the future are going to look nothing like today's. People will be changing jobs and sectors frequently, and resilience and creativity will be at least as important as book knowledge. Give her the tools to successfully chart and cut her own path; you will never be able to lay it all down for her.

+1

I was always a really good math student and got so much pressure in HS to study engineering in college. I had no interest in engineering and ended up a business major since it seemed flexible and I was undecided about what I wanted to do. But classes I was exposed to through that led me into marketing research with combines my strength in math with an interest in consumer behavior. I'd have been a miserable engineer but have had a successful career in research. There are many more potential careers than those that are top of mind. In HS all I seemed to hear about was lawyer, doctor, engineer, teacher.

[Anonymous]

I'm agreeing with the previous two messages. At 16 until I was a junior in college I was going to major in history. I then added chemistry and ultimately got a Ph.D. in a STEM subject. There is nothing my parents could have done to change my mind at those ages, it was all my decision at that point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

Not really. Doing high school science and being scientific in one's outlook and interest are different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I said science is because she's always gotten A's in honors science classes. It's obvious that she's good at it.

This is the first time you've mentioned that.

I'm the STEM PhD who posted a while back, and all I can say is that this thread is very eye opening in terms of how parents think today (my kids are still very young). I view the job of parenting as trying to help kids be independent and learn how to make good choices. Your kid is 16; how many people end up doing the thing they were planning to do when they were that age? Stop assuming that she has to make every decision about her life now, and instead get her thinking productively about *how* to make life decisions. Get her involved in your household budget so she can understand how much various lifestyles cost. Talk to her about what kind of lifestyle she wants etc. Encourage her to research all of the ways that she could couple her interests and strengths (one of the smartest people I know loves sports and is a renowned bio-mechanical engineer who studies how athletes move).

But don't pick her career for her or assume you know what the right decision is for her. People change as they grow, and the careers of the future are going to look nothing like today's. People will be changing jobs and sectors frequently, and resilience and creativity will be at least as important as book knowledge. Give her the tools to successfully chart and cut her own path; you will never be able to lay it all down for her.

+1

I was always a really good math student and got so much pressure in HS to study engineering in college. I had no interest in engineering and ended up a business major since it seemed flexible and I was undecided about what I wanted to do. But classes I was exposed to through that led me into marketing research with combines my strength in math with an interest in consumer behavior. I'd have been a miserable engineer but have had a successful career in research. There are many more potential careers than those that are top of mind. In HS all I seemed to hear about was lawyer, doctor, engineer, teacher.

Yeah, way to go. Compare a useful major like business, math, marketing research with a useless degree from a culinary school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

She's auditioned for her dance studio's competition team for the last 8 years and hasn't made it, she's even auditioned at other places including one in NYC I mentioned earlier and got rejected. I just don't think she's cut out for that field professionally.

OP, you have a daughter who loves dance. Even though you think she shouldn't. Even though you don't think she's any good. Either you deal with this reality, or you don't. It's your choice.

You can love something without expecting your parents to underwrite it. She can love dance five to nine, and do something actually useful nine to five.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not making the competition team is not at all indicative of how she will do as a dance majors. Most dance programs have all freshman in beginning level classes to "unlearn" all of the horrible competition habits

And yet they are much more likely to recruit someone who won the competition than someone who lost it eight years in a row. Not much of a resume builder.

[Anonymous]

I completely understand the OP, and there is no way I would pay for college for a dance major and culinary school. However, I would also not have paid for 12 years of dance lessons. It's too late to chance her interests now - elementary school would have been the time to explore, but perhaps she was too busy taking dance classes.
In terms of practical recommendations: As others have said, it's easy to have multiple majors - so she can combine her "hobby" with a more lucrative major, if she wants your financial support. STEM is not necessarily it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not making the competition team is not at all indicative of how she will do as a dance majors. Most dance programs have all freshman in beginning level classes to "unlearn" all of the horrible competition habits

And yet they are much more likely to recruit someone who won the competition than someone who lost it eight years in a row. Not much of a resume builder.

That's not true. College dance programs would prefer you not compete before coming to them. They "recruit" at high school dance festivals, never EVER at competitions. Cruise ships and Broadway dancers get started on the completion circuit Everyone else needs the depth a Dance degree provides.