How much should a man spend on an engagement ring?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PS (just posted a second ago). You DO NOT need to buy an AMORA or whatever they are called. That is also nonsense. A regular (WELL CUT) CZ is all you need. We got ours from this guy: http://winkcz.com/

He is the nicest, most knowledgable man, and you'll be amazed by the quality of the stone. They are about $60. Buy one and have it sent to your house. It's so inexpensive that you can afford to check it out. If you don't like it you can return it anyway.

It is a good idea to buy a back up stone or two as well, as a CZ could crack more easily than a diamond.

Thank you! Checking out the site now!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, there's something called an Amora Gem (look up BetterThanDiamond.com) that is a very realistic-looking diamond alternative that is a fraction of what a diamond would cost. That might be an option.

I agree with everyone else. Don't finance a ring! My husband did and though it was not very much money, it still was more than he could afford at the time and I should've stuck to my principles.

Personally, I would scour pre-loved jewelry sites (DiamondBistro.com and LoupeTroop.com come to mind) and purchase something within your budget. I don't know how old your child is, but I have two and they get expensive At this point, especially because you are quite young and have many years of earning power before you, I would go with a very modest budget, or at least whatever you have in cash that you want to spend. I would buy either a more traditional engagement ring within that budget or get a kick-ass diamond eternity ring or 5, 7, or 9 stone band and pair it with a thin plain wedding band (though I know that idea is less appealing to many).

Thank you, PP!! I appreciate you. Will be looking at those sites!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PS (just posted a second ago). You DO NOT need to buy an AMORA or whatever they are called. That is also nonsense. A regular (WELL CUT) CZ is all you need. We got ours from this guy: http://winkcz.com/

He is the nicest, most knowledgable man, and you'll be amazed by the quality of the stone. They are about $60. Buy one and have it sent to your house. It's so inexpensive that you can afford to check it out. If you don't like it you can return it anyway.

It is a good idea to buy a back up stone or two as well, as a CZ could crack more easily than a diamond.

Thank you! Checking out the site now!

I'm the PP who suggested an Amora as an option. I actually happen to own or have owned over the years quite a few CZs from Wink and they're good stones; I was just suggesting options for OP. There's also moissanite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PS (just posted a second ago). You DO NOT need to buy an AMORA or whatever they are called. That is also nonsense. A regular (WELL CUT) CZ is all you need. We got ours from this guy: http://winkcz.com/

He is the nicest, most knowledgable man, and you'll be amazed by the quality of the stone. They are about $60. Buy one and have it sent to your house. It's so inexpensive that you can afford to check it out. If you don't like it you can return it anyway.

It is a good idea to buy a back up stone or two as well, as a CZ could crack more easily than a diamond.

Thank you! Checking out the site now!

I'm the PP who suggested an Amora as an option. I actually happen to own or have owned over the years quite a few CZs from Wink and they're good stones; I was just suggesting options for OP. There's also moissanite.

Didn't mean to knock the Amora so aggressively! I just go overly excited (posted immediately post coffee)

[Anonymous]

A bit late to be worrying about how much to spend on the visible sign of your commitment, when you already have a child!

[Anonymous]

Sorry, but I bought an amora and a stone from wink about 5 years ago to put into my very expensive platinum setting flanked by two great glue sapphires. I wanted a larger and cooler stone - I have a .8 (M) and I had the ring reset to fit either one of the 1.5 (about E) fakes. They looked totally flat in the ring. I was very disappointed and then paid to have the ring sized back down. The size was great, but an expensive mistake because of all the resizing a 3-stone ring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A bit late to be worrying about how much to spend on the visible sign of your commitment, when you already have a child!

+1 LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A bit late to be worrying about how much to spend on the visible sign of your commitment, when you already have a child!

[Anonymous]

Wouldn't you rather put that money toward your child's education?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't you rather put that money toward your child's education?

from what i have read today on dcum, colleges give more grants to those in great debt and with no savings

[Anonymous]

Classy women do not need or want engagement rings.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What is this, 1925? Both a man and woman should pay equally (we did).

You bought half of your own ring? Gross.

Do you not do joint finances? By the time it came time for engagement ring shopping, we definitely saw our finances as tied together.

No way would I pay for half my ring and I make way more than my fiance. I would be fine with a smaller ring and definetly wouldn't want him financing a ring because our finacnes would be joint. But, sorry, there is something still to be said for the man paying for the ring entirely.

"...but I demand equal rights for everything else."

But why would I go half for a present for myself? That is silly. It is essentially a gift. An engagment ring is given by the man in consideration of the woman accepting the reqeust to marry. If the woman does not go through with the marrioage, the man can legally request that the ring that was given in consideration be given back. Why would I pay for half of that? If he is able to get it back if we don't marry. Even if one were to consider it a gift, why would I go half on a gift for me?

Would I force him to accept less of a birthday present because he earns less? Feminism has gone to far when you are not allowed to ask that a gift be given to you without you chipping in.

But the problem is, feminism doesn't stop at equality. It wants the men to "pay reparations." So, they want equal everything else AND chivalry AND *certain* traditions, like the man should still by the ring and initiate the marriage. But... Now that we have all that out of the way, "Don't think I'm going to change my name to yours. That is so sexist."

I suspect feminism wasn't born with the mentality of the shit it has become.

PP here, but I have no problem changing my name!!!! I don't feel like I have anything to prove by not changing it. I'm just unwilling to contribute to my own gift. I don't mind paying for household expenses by myself if I am the one that can afford it. i have no problem cooking dinner if I am the one home. I also have no problem working as many hours as I need to to provide for my family. But why does that mean I should pay for my own gift? Feminism to me = choices. And my choice is I am not paying for my own gift!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is this, 1925? Both a man and woman should pay equally (we did).

You bought half of your own ring? Gross.

Do you not do joint finances? By the time it came time for engagement ring shopping, we definitely saw our finances as tied together.

No way would I pay for half my ring and I make way more than my fiance. I would be fine with a smaller ring and definetly wouldn't want him financing a ring because our finacnes would be joint. But, sorry, there is something still to be said for the man paying for the ring entirely.

"...but I demand equal rights for everything else."

But why would I go half for a present for myself? That is silly. It is essentially a gift. An engagment ring is given by the man in consideration of the woman accepting the reqeust to marry. If the woman does not go through with the marrioage, the man can legally request that the ring that was given in consideration be given back. Why would I pay for half of that? If he is able to get it back if we don't marry. Even if one were to consider it a gift, why would I go half on a gift for me?

Would I force him to accept less of a birthday present because he earns less? Feminism has gone to far when you are not allowed to ask that a gift be given to you without you chipping in.

But the problem is, feminism doesn't stop at equality. It wants the men to "pay reparations." So, they want equal everything else AND chivalry AND *certain* traditions, like the man should still by the ring and initiate the marriage. But... Now that we have all that out of the way, "Don't think I'm going to change my name to yours. That is so sexist."

I suspect feminism wasn't born with the mentality of the shit it has become.

PP here, but I have no problem changing my name!!!! I don't feel like I have anything to prove by not changing it. I'm just unwilling to contribute to my own gift. I don't mind paying for household expenses by myself if I am the one that can afford it. i have no problem cooking dinner if I am the one home. I also have no problem working as many hours as I need to to provide for my family. But why does that mean I should pay for my own gift? Feminism to me = choices. And my choice is I am not paying for my own gift!!!

If it were a plain old gift that would be one thing, because it would imply there was reciprocity. But there are so many societal pressures attached to an engagement ring - it has to be a certain stone, has to cost a certain multiple of earnings (all a DeBeers marketing ploy, as others have pointed out), etc. And why does society say that only the woman get this symbol? Why don't men wear a symbol showing they've been claimed by a woman?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend and I have started thinking about a budget for an engagement ring, for when (or if lol) he decides to make the purchase. We are middle class, with a combined income of around $110k. We live together and have one child, spending an average amount of money (i guess?) on bills. How much did you spend on the ring for your financee/wife? Did you go by the 3 months income "rule"? We are curious as to what others budgeted. Thanks!

Zero. I'm a woman, if that matters.

I don't set a big stock on jewelry to start with, and I think engagement rings are a totally unnecessary expense (I feel the same about wedding rings, btw).

There are so many enjoyable things you could spend money on, why blow it on a ring?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Buy what you can afford to pay in a lump sum now, or are OK with paying off in the future. For some, that would be a $1000 ring, for others, a $100,000 ring.

People really do go into debt for engagement rings? Wow. Now I have officially heard it all.