| He could still choose another school if he’s admitted. I know of two students who were accepted early to Yale and ultimately chose Harvard. |
| Is it rude to not withdraw existing applications (Michigan, UCs) if already accepted REA? Public school and there are no Dalton-like rules here. DC’s first choice was originally UCLA though very likely would not attend if admitted. |
I am earlier poster, I don’t think “rude” and some kids are truly torn and need the extra time and to revisit. But if your kid absolutely knows they will attend EA school and finances work for your family, I believe in committing and withdrawing. It may help someone else and practicing commitment is a good skill for your kid. And, they can enjoy senior year! |
OP- not jealous, just annoyed that DC’s friend is choosing to apply to P and H just for fun with no intention to attend. DC1 is at Stanford (admitted REA) and another that was admitted but chose somewhere else (deferred then admitted to Stanford) DC1 didn’t apply elsewhere because they didn’t want to be that kind of person. DC2 had to apply elsewhere because of the deferral. |
Getting annoyed at the behavior of a 17 year old kid that isn’t yours? Good luck with that in life. |
I don’t see anything wrong with this. They are in drastically different parts of the country. Why not see and then compare acceptances and programs later? Just for fun could be a cover, if they are having second thoughts about moving so far away. Many would be thinking “who would turn down Stanford?!” Maybe the kid would actually prefer to be on the east coast or likes the program better elsewhere. |
| Adding to my post above, I know someone who got into Stanford and was going to go until they decided on MIT really late in the spring instead. |
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At our private nyc school, people know one reason for paying for the school is not just education, but connections. We have a few kids who, against the advice of counselors, will apply after getting in via SCEA or Questbridge. As often as not, they dont end up getting anything better, but even if they did: they've fumbled some of the social capital they built during HS or even k-12 sometimes. Which is a big hit.
The rich families play a very different game - SCEA or ED to their own legacy school and call it a day. Don't get in the way of the other rich kids (who may not be old money, may not be legacy). Praise and party all the kids no matter where they go. It's all about keeping those connections strong after leaving the high school. That's who you're calling to get an internships a summer or two later! |
| I think if 100% committed you shouldn’t apply for fun. But, I know many kids that waffle and change their minds. |
OP, I appreciate your posts and other more supportive PPs. My kid is at the receiving end with multiple classmates saying they will RD after SCEA acceptances. It really stings. I can only tell my kid to apply more widely in RD. |
Sounds to me like OP is either highly judgmental or looking for yet another way to think that her kid is “better” when compared to other kids - “at least mine doesn’t apply elsewhere” |
There's a lot of truth to this. The students who were accepted into HYPS in the SCEA round, but continue to apply and trophy hunt, are burning their potential networks down to the ground. That might not be as true at giant public schools, but it is very much the case at private schools. Loser families. |
Stanford is famous for the pressure to look like you are coasting when you are drowning. They are ducks. The visible part is calm but they are all paddling furiously under water. They can't admit anything is hard because EVERYTHING is hard. |
Are putting TJ into the DC public magnet bucket? Because there is no school in DC where this happened. |