My wife wants a $8,000 handbag. Please help!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spend the 8 grand on a lawyer and get a new wife. This one is worthless and getting rid of her is a great investment.

DCUM's lazy answer to all marital arguments: get a divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does she mean she’s going to buy it anyway? If she does, isn’t this all moot?

OP made it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids? Is she depressed? If she's not usually prone to asking for expensive gifts, it could be a sign of depression.

Also, can you afford such a gift?

I was thinking the same thing. Is she happy being a SAHM? I wonder if she is struggling with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
This is not a milestone birthday. She is turning 34. I’m 32.
Our kids are 3 and 5. After our second child was born, we decided she will stay home until both kids start school.
I’m the sole breadwinner. HHI is $250k.
We have a mortgage but our cars are paid off.
We only started funding our 529s last year.
Our net worth is approximately $700k including home equity.

I don’t think we can afford to spend $8k on a handbag.

I believe she is being influenced by some of her friends.
She said that if I don't get her that handbag, she'll just buy it herself and remember that I'm a worthless husband.

She needs new friends or you need a new wife. Gross.

[Anonymous]

I was saying a woman who explained to me that she and all her friends compete with each other for who has the nicest bag, but nice is determined based on brand. Birkin was very popular in her group. I had never heard of Birkin before she told me about it. She thought I was an idiot for not knowing about Birkin bags. I thought she was an idiot for having one and having friends who had them. That conversation was the beginning of the end for the two of us.

I'd spend the money on an experience, like a trip to a foreign country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I absolutely would not do that. That is an unreasonable request.

This. She’s crazy.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think she can demand a gift.

I would tell her that you think it is time for her to go back to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids? Is she depressed? If she's not usually prone to asking for expensive gifts, it could be a sign of depression.

Also, can you afford such a gift?

I was thinking the same thing. Is she happy being a SAHM? I wonder if she is struggling with it.

She's struggling at basic Math

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spend the 8 grand on a lawyer and get a new wife. This one is worthless and getting rid of her is a great investment.

DCUM's lazy answer to all marital arguments: get a divorce.

It's a fair response honestly. Something to consider.
Her ignorance about their finances & what they can and can't afford is a huge issue...and won't end with the $8k Chanel bag.
Especially if she wants to keep up with her friends and give the appearance she's wealthy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get a Chinese knockoff. She won't know the difference if you select carefully.

Don’t you dare do this OP, I would rather have no bag than a fake. There are authenticity tags in many of the designer handbags, they can be scanned to detect if they are counterfeit.

This. I guarantee you she will walk into Chanel one day to have it authenticated and will sink into the floor and feel humiliate when they tell her it's a fake.

She would deserve it.

[Anonymous]

My guy bought his his SAHW (no kids but didn't feel like workkng) a $10K+ eternity band to make her happy. He earned about $120K at the time, so more than a month's take home pay. Guess how much regrets that now that he's paying monthly alimony???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Channel bag is for poor people pretending to be rich. Rich people buy Hermes Kelly bag.

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was saying a woman who explained to me that she and all her friends compete with each other for who has the nicest bag, but nice is determined based on brand. Birkin was very popular in her group. I had never heard of Birkin before she told me about it. She thought I was an idiot for not knowing about Birkin bags. I thought she was an idiot for having one and having friends who had them. That conversation was the beginning of the end for the two of us.

I'd spend the money on an experience, like a trip to a foreign country.

This bs superiority is so tired.

Stop judging what other people would prefer to spend their money on, and getting all superior over the different thing you would spend it on.

[Anonymous]

totally ridiculous. Don't buy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was saying a woman who explained to me that she and all her friends compete with each other for who has the nicest bag, but nice is determined based on brand. Birkin was very popular in her group. I had never heard of Birkin before she told me about it. She thought I was an idiot for not knowing about Birkin bags. I thought she was an idiot for having one and having friends who had them. That conversation was the beginning of the end for the two of us.

I'd spend the money on an experience, like a trip to a foreign country.

This bs superiority is so tired.

Stop judging what other people would prefer to spend their money on, and getting all superior over the different thing you would spend it on.

If a woman wants to date me, she won't get far if she's the type of woman who would spend $8,000 (or ask her partner to spend it) so she can show off the fact that she has an extremely expensive bag with the insignia of the "best" brand. That's just too superficial for me. The enjoyment of the bag isn't due to superior quality. It's enjoyment from displaying the brand. That's different from preferring the Four Seasons hotel to a Sheraton, or preferring a Porsche sports car to a Ford Mustang, or preferring dinner at a Michelin starred restaurant to TGIFridays, or preferring a trip to the Grand Canyon over Luray Caverns.