It's official: Gen Z are not delaying marriage til 30s anymore, young weddings are cool again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school. People acted like I was a teen mom. It was ridiculous. I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices. I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s. So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted. I knew DH was a good partner.

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties!

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me. He is the one who put me through law school. We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant. Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own? I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do. I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s.

This is how i feel as well- the time from newborn through elementary is the THE golden era of my life, i enjoyed it so so much. more than anything else and i still enjoy my kids a lot but having them in my early 30's and priortzing just chilling with them and my mom friends from that time was a halcyon time. with my youngest i had a lot of the 'sandwich' situation and just covid and stuff and i feel sad that i didnt get to enjoy my last baby asmuch and am SO glad i can enjoy her elemnetary years now without any distractions. BUt then i had kids b/c i really wanted them and enjoy spending time with them and they bring me infifnite joy, i dont feel like i sacrificed a lot for them at all. got married in mid 20s, finished up grad school, went backpacking, traveled alot for 5 years and then started having kids. Its a good life plan if you can swing it. and we are both immigranst who have to financially assist one set of parents. so built our own wealth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school. People acted like I was a teen mom. It was ridiculous. I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices. I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s. So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted. I knew DH was a good partner.

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties!

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me. He is the one who put me through law school. We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant. Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own? I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do. I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s.

And I can’t imagine changing diapers in my 40’s 🤣😂🤣

Stay in your own lane, judgey. My life is awesome. 🤣😂🤣

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

I don’t. 6 was a great age. 16 was also great for different reasons but the younger years were so special.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

I don’t. 6 was a great age. 16 was also great for different reasons but the younger years were so special.

Where did I say they aren't? Personally, the fact that they are so special is why I loved experiencing them when I was younger and had more energy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

I don’t. 6 was a great age. 16 was also great for different reasons but the younger years were so special.

DP. All the years with my kids are special. I don’t think their younger years were more special than now. I’m having a blast with my kids as teen and tween.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school. People acted like I was a teen mom. It was ridiculous. I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices. I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s. So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted. I knew DH was a good partner.

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties!

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me. He is the one who put me through law school. We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant. Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own? I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do. I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s.

I'm not that PP, and I LOVE having kids, but I'm also not a martyr. No matter how much you love babies and little kids, it is a tiring time in life and there is some unpleasantness to it. I am glad to have been changing diapers and chasing after toddlers and doing 2am wakeups and carting around strollers and other gear when I was late 20/early 30s with energy galore than doing it now, at 43, when I'm getting older and need/want more sleep and can't "hang" like I used to. *shrug*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school. People acted like I was a teen mom. It was ridiculous. I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices. I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s. So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted. I knew DH was a good partner.

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties!

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me. He is the one who put me through law school. We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant. Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own? I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do. I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s.

I'm not that PP, and I LOVE having kids, but I'm also not a martyr. No matter how much you love babies and little kids, it is a tiring time in life and there is some unpleasantness to it. I am glad to have been changing diapers and chasing after toddlers and doing 2am wakeups and carting around strollers and other gear when I was late 20/early 30s with energy galore than doing it now, at 43, when I'm getting older and need/want more sleep and can't "hang" like I used to. *shrug*

Agree! Juggling FT work and kids is so much easier when you are young! I'm a fairly energetic person, but there's a biological reason why fertility starts declining in your mid-30s!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

I don’t. 6 was a great age. 16 was also great for different reasons but the younger years were so special.

DP. All the years with my kids are special. I don’t think their younger years were more special than now. I’m having a blast with my kids as teen and tween.

Yep! I have a 17 year old and 15 year old twins and they are super active (I'm 45) - they love hiking and adventuring and playing sports- and while I would hope that I could still do things like that with them in my mid-late 50s, aging is inevitable and I love being able to enjoy the things they enjoy alongside of them, to be able to take the kinds of trips they want to take without worrying about being too tired/not having stamina, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

I don’t. 6 was a great age. 16 was also great for different reasons but the younger years were so special.

It is a great age and I’m glad I experienced it (3 times). But I don’t need to be doing it indefinitely. Every stage has its pluses and minuses.

Overall, I think there’s a reason why we are biologically designed to have babies in our twenties. I am still in good shape for forty + but I don’t bounce back as easily. I get aches and pains just from sitting too long at my desk. I need more sleep. It’s not the same and it is silly to pretend it is.

That said, I do understand wanting to have a baby in your late thirties or early forties if you’ve never had one. Better late than never.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for everyone commenting, the conclusion that marrying in your 20s is superior but it's hard to find a good partner.

It’s widely covered in media that dating as adults is MUCH harder than it used to be, and that dating apps are almost corrosive in the effort to get married.

If you want a serious partner, Princeton mom was right: college is the time to find that life mate. There will be no other time when you can date with less risk (like dating your coworker or neighbor), and high quality curated partners. Maybe grad school is a bit better but GenZ got the memo — settle down in college or look for a decade or more in the dating desert.

Princeton mom and brunch granny were always spot on.

Look at the coping in this thread from women who wasted their 20s, had to settle with random balding men in their 30s, struggled to get pregnant, and now they’re allegedly old moms with young kids. No matter how hard they spin, none of that is appealing. And frankly, some of these posters are probably actually unmarried and childless women who can’t admit they were duped by modern liberalism and feminism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got married at 23 and had my first at 26, in law school. People acted like I was a teen mom. It was ridiculous. I’ve been married for 17 years and I’m really happy with my choices. I have health problems now that could have kept me from having kids in my 30s. So I’m really glad I got that done in my 20s and I would recommend for my children to do the same.

At the same time, I was fairly mature at 23 and knew what I wanted. I knew DH was a good partner.

I wish I could have had children younger. I don't see what the big deal is. Think of how young you'll be when the nest empties!

I’ll be 46 and an empty nester MUAHAHAHA.

My 20s were hard but I’m happy DH was with me. He is the one who put me through law school. We had marriage, law school, babies overlapping and it was super hard but by my mid 30s life was so pleasant. Now nearing 40 my kids are older and I am really enjoying my life. I didn’t travel or date a lot but DH and I have had some fun trips while my parents stay with the kids.

It always stands out to me that young parents seem thrilled to be empty nesters and “enjoying my life.” There is this mindset that you’re happy the phase of having kids is over with.

Did you not enjoy having kids?
Perhaps you had to give up so much in your 20s and you feel like your time is finally your own? I can imagine you had virtually no time to yourself and had to struggle through lawschool if you had young babies at the same time.

I can’t imagine viewing having a family the way you do. I loved my time in my 20s and it’s now great to have a young family in my 40s.

I'm not that PP, and I LOVE having kids, but I'm also not a martyr. No matter how much you love babies and little kids, it is a tiring time in life and there is some unpleasantness to it. I am glad to have been changing diapers and chasing after toddlers and doing 2am wakeups and carting around strollers and other gear when I was late 20/early 30s with energy galore than doing it now, at 43, when I'm getting older and need/want more sleep and can't "hang" like I used to. *shrug*

Agree! Juggling FT work and kids is so much easier when you are young! I'm a fairly energetic person, but there's a biological reason why fertility starts declining in your mid-30s!

How? The average 20 something has little to no accrued leave for maternity leave. Most 20 somethings aren’t even making enough to pay for childcare which is why it’s a career killer to have kids young.

In my 20s I would have had six weeks off post birth and my salary would not have paid for a nanny.

Having kids in my late 30s meant six months of leave, seniority that meant I could work remotely and a salary high enough to pay for a nanny.

I can’t see how having kids in HS is good for obtaining an education and don’t see how having kids in your 20s is good for building a career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for everyone commenting, the conclusion that marrying in your 20s is superior but it's hard to find a good partner.

It’s widely covered in media that dating as adults is MUCH harder than it used to be, and that dating apps are almost corrosive in the effort to get married.

If you want a serious partner, Princeton mom was right: college is the time to find that life mate. There will be no other time when you can date with less risk (like dating your coworker or neighbor), and high quality curated partners. Maybe grad school is a bit better but GenZ got the memo — settle down in college or look for a decade or more in the dating desert.

Princeton mom and brunch granny were always spot on.

Look at the coping in this thread from women who wasted their 20s, had to settle with random balding men in their 30s, struggled to get pregnant, and now they’re allegedly old moms with young kids. No matter how hard they spin, none of that is appealing. And frankly, some of these posters are probably actually unmarried and childless women who can’t admit they were duped by modern liberalism and feminism.

You’re not at all biased.

Yes, every single woman who got married in her 30s settled for someone balding and struggled to get pregnant. Do you see how insane that sounds?

When you post unhinged extreme comments like this it doesn’t support your position. Any normal person reading this wonders why someone would be so angry about women having kids and a career later in life. It doesn’t add up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:20-yo Millie Bobby Brown and 22-yo husband (Bon Jovi's model son) just revealed their gorgeous wedding photos on social media to her 65 million followers. MBB is a trend setter. This follows influencer Sofia Richie getting married and quickly pregnant last year when she was just 24-yo. Pendulum has swung, gen Z'ers consider it is un-cool and weird to wait until late 20s or 30s to settle down.

If your impulse is to be disgusted by this and predict the demise of these marriages you just reveal yourself to be a terminally miserable person. Every parent wishes their child finds love at this age. Buy a house. Have kids. Make a life together.

The “Sex and the City” whoring around until your 30s, blowing money renting apartments and dining out, and binge drinking your prime away was always a scam. Good to see young people wising up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an elder millennial who married at 23. DH is 4 years older and is in finance so he had a well paid, stable job at the time. We bought a house right away and had 3 kids by the time I was 31. We both have grad degrees and are still happily married 20 years later.

I love being a 42 yo with a 16 yo rather than a 6 yo, if you know what I mean.

Wild guess.... you grew up UMC/wealthy, got that grad degree and.... never worked again!

You were just a mommy-in-training in college who wanted a grad degree for the social status messaging it sends. Clearly, having babies and getting married your was your primary goal. So it's not surprising that you actually did that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:20-yo Millie Bobby Brown and 22-yo husband (Bon Jovi's model son) just revealed their gorgeous wedding photos on social media to her 65 million followers. MBB is a trend setter. This follows influencer Sofia Richie getting married and quickly pregnant last year when she was just 24-yo. Pendulum has swung, gen Z'ers consider it is un-cool and weird to wait until late 20s or 30s to settle down.

If your impulse is to be disgusted by this and predict the demise of these marriages you just reveal yourself to be a terminally miserable person. Every parent wishes their child finds love at this age. Buy a house. Have kids. Make a life together.

The “Sex and the City” whoring around until your 30s, blowing money renting apartments and dining out, and binge drinking your prime away was always a scam. Good to see young people wising up.

Bad idea to use Hollywood and celebrity to prove your point. They will let you down.
I wish MBB the best, like her as an actress, but hope this rush to marriage was not caused by some trauma in her short life due to her being involved in acting and Hollywood from a very young age.