Any other moms out just not order when you eat with your family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:N-1 person again. When we do this, I will eat off DH's plate, so it's not sending the message everyone but mom gets a meal. i do agree that isn't a great message to send.

We still do it now when we are traveling, in particular. That's when we really don't want leftovers.

When we are on a road trip and get fast food, the kids get the meal deal - entree, fries, drink. But my husband and I get one meal deal, and one entree, and we split the drink and the fries. I don't know if it's cheaper, really (because my husband gets the large side and drink), but it just feels like a more reasonable purchase.

You split a big Mac??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop being doormats. You control the kids, and you open your mouth and tell them no if they want to order too much/something too expensive. If you can’t afford to eat a meal at that restaurant then none of you eat out and cook at home.

YES!! How ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I sometimes did this because I am cheap, picky, and don’t like to see food wasted. I don’t think it’s a big deal. Now that my kids are older and more likely to finish their meals, I rarely skip ordering. I don’t see why people need to shame others so much.

The shamers in this thread are most likely fat gluttons who are justifying their over spending and over eating as being… feminism?

So, you think that people who actually eat dinner are “over eaters” and “fat?” But, you’re the one without weird food hangups?

No I think the people shaming OP are fat over eaters. Work on your reading comprehension.

Disordered behavior should be described as such. It does no one any good to pretend that OP is healthy and okay. She's not. It's like calling it "shaming" to describe a tumor as cancer.

It’s not disordered just because some over dramatic idiots could never dream of NOT wasting food and money every time they belly up to the trough.

I don’t think OP’s choices are disordered, just set a bad example for her kids. That being said, all the comments saying it is disordered eating have been relatively kind and not shaming. Your comments on other posters however…

What world are you living in where it is KIND to tell a mother that she has an eating disorder, is acting like a martyr, and is a bad mother (sorry, setting a bad example for her children)?

Yeah…I don’t get this. This is in no way an eating disorder or being a martyr. OP isn’t doing this as a way to cut calories/lose weight nor is she complaining about or saying she feels obligated to do it and resents it. Sounded like she is ok with it for practical reasons and just wondering if anyone else does this too. In DCUM everything is labeled an eating disorder

Op - yes I’m fine with it. I do think the person who gets 3 dishes between 4 prob has the right move- sometimes we also go to small plates places and just order less than the kids think we should get and still end up with leftovers.
I just am so so uncomfortable with food waste and everything is so expensive right now. I think also kids have wildly off base ideas of how much they can consume

Then you all need to stay home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I sometimes did this because I am cheap, picky, and don’t like to see food wasted. I don’t think it’s a big deal. Now that my kids are older and more likely to finish their meals, I rarely skip ordering. I don’t see why people need to shame others so much.

The shamers in this thread are most likely fat gluttons who are justifying their over spending and over eating as being… feminism?

Joining this thread for the first time, but that doesn't sound right. I'm a size 2 mother of two, and when I go out to a restaurant I want to fully enjoy the experience and order something delicious that I can't cook at home, so that's what I do.

Frequently just snack at home for dinner or eat the kids leftovers nuggets or something, but not if I'm spending the time and expense going to a restaurant. One additional entree is not a big deal if you are already out.

+1 And I don’t understand all the talk about food waste. I will bring leftovers home every time.

[Anonymous]

This is like the old saying, “A mother’s favorite piece of chicken is the back.”

[Anonymous]

Sometimes I order something for myself that my kids can eat and get a side. Like if we get Mexican, I know they will chow down on salsa and chips and basically only eat rice so I get fajitas and me and my two kids will have leftovers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I used to do this when my kids were little and we’d eat out. You’re not alone. Eventually we stopped eating out very often bc it just wasn’t fun- rushed, not really enough or the right food for me. I realize now why my family did y go out to eat often when I was little. It is so expensive! And ultimately, not that much fun for the parents.

Yes, of course it’s not fun for a person with an eating disorder to watch their family eat dinner in a restaurant, and I’d imagine it’s even more unpleasant to go to dinner with a person who sits not eating and staring at you while you’re trying to enjoy your steak.

Lol... watching you eat and hoping you leave some.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:curious if others do this. I just can't handle either the food waste or the expense, so I basically never order. I know the kids wont ever finish their food despite their insistence they will. I was like - I cannot be the only one.

It's not a "mom" thing, despite all the sexist witches on this thread.

This is one of the many ways that people are impacted by trying to live well with a family that doesn't share values.

Why do you go out to eat? Does your spouse exist? I stay home when they go out for bad meals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I sometimes did this because I am cheap, picky, and don’t like to see food wasted. I don’t think it’s a big deal. Now that my kids are older and more likely to finish their meals, I rarely skip ordering. I don’t see why people need to shame others so much.

The shamers in this thread are most likely fat gluttons who are justifying their over spending and over eating as being… feminism?

So, you think that people who actually eat dinner are “over eaters” and “fat?” But, you’re the one without weird food hangups?

No I think the people shaming OP are fat over eaters. Work on your reading comprehension.

Disordered behavior should be described as such. It does no one any good to pretend that OP is healthy and okay. She's not. It's like calling it "shaming" to describe a tumor as cancer.

It’s not disordered just because some over dramatic idiots could never dream of NOT wasting food and money every time they belly up to the trough.

I don’t think OP’s choices are disordered, just set a bad example for her kids. That being said, all the comments saying it is disordered eating have been relatively kind and not shaming. Your comments on other posters however…

What world are you living in where it is KIND to tell a mother that she has an eating disorder, is acting like a martyr, and is a bad mother (sorry, setting a bad example for her children)?

Yeah…I don’t get this. This is in no way an eating disorder or being a martyr. OP isn’t doing this as a way to cut calories/lose weight nor is she complaining about or saying she feels obligated to do it and resents it. Sounded like she is ok with it for practical reasons and just wondering if anyone else does this too. In DCUM everything is labeled an eating disorder

Op - yes I’m fine with it. I do think the person who gets 3 dishes between 4 prob has the right move- sometimes we also go to small plates places and just order less than the kids think we should get and still end up with leftovers.
I just am so so uncomfortable with food waste and everything is so expensive right now. I think also kids have wildly off base ideas of how much they can consume

It's not waste if you eat it. Why aren't you taking home and eating left overs?

I don’t need $40 worth of leftovers. That’s like 25% of our weekly grocery budget for a half eaten piece of salmon and a third of a cheeseburger.

Well then, keep eating grilled cheese crusts and the burnt ends of chicken fingers. Sad, but you do you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me of the SNL skit about Totino's where the wife gets a Super Bowl Activity Fun pack that includes one Totino...

It reminds me of all the TV and magazine ads in the 70s and 80s that showed the husband and kids at the table and the mom in the kitchen with no place for her at the table.

[Anonymous]

In civilized cultures, dishes are ordered family style for sharing, not separate individual meals.

[Anonymous]

No, I order what I want and it certainly isn't the chicken nuggets my kid is most likely ordering.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:curious if others do this. I just can't handle either the food waste or the expense, so I basically never order. I know the kids wont ever finish their food despite their insistence they will. I was like - I cannot be the only one.

It's not a "mom" thing, despite all the sexist witches on this thread.

This is one of the many ways that people are impacted by trying to live well with a family that doesn't share values.

Why do you go out to eat? Does your spouse exist? I stay home when they go out for bad meals.

It’s against your values to go out to eat but you do anyway because you and the kids don’t share values? I am totally confused.

Passing on my values to my kids is important. If something was against my values I wouldn’t take them to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I sometimes did this because I am cheap, picky, and don’t like to see food wasted. I don’t think it’s a big deal. Now that my kids are older and more likely to finish their meals, I rarely skip ordering. I don’t see why people need to shame others so much.

The shamers in this thread are most likely fat gluttons who are justifying their over spending and over eating as being… feminism?

So, you think that people who actually eat dinner are “over eaters” and “fat?” But, you’re the one without weird food hangups?

No I think the people shaming OP are fat over eaters. Work on your reading comprehension.

Disordered behavior should be described as such. It does no one any good to pretend that OP is healthy and okay. She's not. It's like calling it "shaming" to describe a tumor as cancer.

It’s not disordered just because some over dramatic idiots could never dream of NOT wasting food and money every time they belly up to the trough.

I don’t think OP’s choices are disordered, just set a bad example for her kids. That being said, all the comments saying it is disordered eating have been relatively kind and not shaming. Your comments on other posters however…

What world are you living in where it is KIND to tell a mother that she has an eating disorder, is acting like a martyr, and is a bad mother (sorry, setting a bad example for her children)?

Yeah…I don’t get this. This is in no way an eating disorder or being a martyr. OP isn’t doing this as a way to cut calories/lose weight nor is she complaining about or saying she feels obligated to do it and resents it. Sounded like she is ok with it for practical reasons and just wondering if anyone else does this too. In DCUM everything is labeled an eating disorder

Op - yes I’m fine with it. I do think the person who gets 3 dishes between 4 prob has the right move- sometimes we also go to small plates places and just order less than the kids think we should get and still end up with leftovers.
I just am so so uncomfortable with food waste and everything is so expensive right now. I think also kids have wildly off base ideas of how much they can consume

It's not waste if you eat it. Why aren't you taking home and eating left overs?

I don’t need $40 worth of leftovers. That’s like 25% of our weekly grocery budget for a half eaten piece of salmon and a third of a cheeseburger.

Do you not understand that the leftovers mean you have to buy fewer groceries?

a third of cheeseburger doesn't mean fewer groceries

[Anonymous]

The mom orders. The kids share a meal.