Why are Americans so defensive about America?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from the UK and growing up, when people criticized the UK, it was not a big deal. WE criticized ourselves. Of course there are some stereotypes I disagree with like that ALL the food is terrible. But a lot of them have merit. I feel like we constantly spoke in my family and other families about ways in which other countries were better. France had better access to good quality food and a better attitude to cooking. Japan was healthier. Most places had better weather. Having a royal family was possibly very dumb. English people are often pale and excessively embarrassing in a football abroad context. I could go on. It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT. And immediately tell you to 'go back where you came from'. Like - WTF? Americans cannot possibly think that everything about America (obesity, drug prices, health insurance, severe weather + trailer parks, trump etc etc) is amazing. It's just not feasible - that would be lying. So what gives? Doesn't positive change happen when you are able to look inwards, see other possibilities and dream of a better way? Do ppl think they will burst into flames if they admit that Twinkies are... sub optimal?

Why are Europeans who post these kinds of opinions such condescending over generalizing ass hats? Note, I didn't say all Europeans, just anonymous internet blowhards like yourself.

Just how many Americans have you ever personally met and actually had a deep probing but friendly conversation with, about any topic at all? That is, actually asked about and listened to their opinions, not attacked them with your smug sense of uneatned entitlement and superiority? I would guess the number is less than 5 and probably closer to zero.

Most of these posts just validate OP's point about many Americans being thin skinned.

+100

Europeans are the absolute worst when it comes to the above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm from the UK and growing up, when people criticized the UK, it was not a big deal. WE criticized ourselves. Of course there are some stereotypes I disagree with like that ALL the food is terrible. But a lot of them have merit. I feel like we constantly spoke in my family and other families about ways in which other countries were better. France had better access to good quality food and a better attitude to cooking. Japan was healthier. Most places had better weather. Having a royal family was possibly very dumb. English people are often pale and excessively embarrassing in a football abroad context. I could go on. It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT. And immediately tell you to 'go back where you came from'. Like - WTF? Americans cannot possibly think that everything about America (obesity, drug prices, health insurance, severe weather + trailer parks, trump etc etc) is amazing. It's just not feasible - that would be lying. So what gives? Doesn't positive change happen when you are able to look inwards, see other possibilities and dream of a better way? Do ppl think they will burst into flames if they admit that Twinkies are... sub optimal?

I am an immigrant who lived all over the world. Everything in America is amazing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from the UK and growing up, when people criticized the UK, it was not a big deal. WE criticized ourselves. Of course there are some stereotypes I disagree with like that ALL the food is terrible. But a lot of them have merit. I feel like we constantly spoke in my family and other families about ways in which other countries were better. France had better access to good quality food and a better attitude to cooking. Japan was healthier. Most places had better weather. Having a royal family was possibly very dumb. English people are often pale and excessively embarrassing in a football abroad context. I could go on. It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT. And immediately tell you to 'go back where you came from'. Like - WTF? Americans cannot possibly think that everything about America (obesity, drug prices, health insurance, severe weather + trailer parks, trump etc etc) is amazing. It's just not feasible - that would be lying. So what gives? Doesn't positive change happen when you are able to look inwards, see other possibilities and dream of a better way? Do ppl think they will burst into flames if they admit that Twinkies are... sub optimal?

I am an immigrant who lived all over the world. Everything in America is amazing!

You will go far with that positive attitude!

If that is sarcasm, it is also fabulous and you will go far!

[Anonymous]

Anyone can have an "idea". Hey why don't you try.....is an idea. That's cool.

A "criticism" is a vocalization on the same level as a moral judgment so criticisms are really demands. Can't insist anyone listen to your criticisms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In a healthy democracy, there should be room in public discourse for criticism of that democracy. Period.

THIS.
I mean I live in NYC and if someone says NYC needs to work on dealing with the mental health issue and homelessness, I'd be like - yes. you are 100% correct.
I just dont get these people who are like - what do you even MEAN gun crime is a problem? go home if you don't like child homicide.
JFC.

But the problem is we do not have a healthy democracy right now. The vast majority of voter support sensible gun control and our elected officials do nothing. The vast majority of voters are pro-choice yet our politicians do not reflect this fact. The vast majority of Americans want affordable housing, healthcare, daycare, and a good public education system but again what are our elected official focusing on?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm from the UK and growing up, when people criticized the UK, it was not a big deal. WE criticized ourselves. Of course there are some stereotypes I disagree with like that ALL the food is terrible. But a lot of them have merit. I feel like we constantly spoke in my family and other families about ways in which other countries were better. France had better access to good quality food and a better attitude to cooking. Japan was healthier. Most places had better weather. Having a royal family was possibly very dumb. English people are often pale and excessively embarrassing in a football abroad context. I could go on. It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT. And immediately tell you to 'go back where you came from'. Like - WTF? Americans cannot possibly think that everything about America (obesity, drug prices, health insurance, severe weather + trailer parks, trump etc etc) is amazing. It's just not feasible - that would be lying. So what gives? Doesn't positive change happen when you are able to look inwards, see other possibilities and dream of a better way? Do ppl think they will burst into flames if they admit that Twinkies are... sub optimal?

It is very generalized statement. Can you give an example of exactly what you said to prompt the response to go where you came from?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm from the UK and growing up, when people criticized the UK, it was not a big deal. WE criticized ourselves. Of course there are some stereotypes I disagree with like that ALL the food is terrible. But a lot of them have merit. I feel like we constantly spoke in my family and other families about ways in which other countries were better. France had better access to good quality food and a better attitude to cooking. Japan was healthier. Most places had better weather. Having a royal family was possibly very dumb. English people are often pale and excessively embarrassing in a football abroad context. I could go on. It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT. And immediately tell you to 'go back where you came from'. Like - WTF? Americans cannot possibly think that everything about America (obesity, drug prices, health insurance, severe weather + trailer parks, trump etc etc) is amazing. It's just not feasible - that would be lying. So what gives? Doesn't positive change happen when you are able to look inwards, see other possibilities and dream of a better way? Do ppl think they will burst into flames if they admit that Twinkies are... sub optimal?

I am an immigrant who lived all over the world. Everything in America is amazing!

You will go far with that positive attitude!

If that is sarcasm, it is also fabulous and you will go far!

No sarcasm at all. I do recognize that what separate Americans from the rest of the world it is their Constitution and they have a right to be proud of it. It will take a little bit deeper analyses to understand it and not only compare your American doctor bill to a free visit in UK.

[Anonymous]

The thing that annoys me the most is my European relatives' condescending attitude and arrogance when it comes to the US.

They tilt their noses in the air and look down at Americans like we are some sort of sub-species and can NEVER be as fit, fashionable or intelligent as they are. They subtly criticize what we do, what we eat, how we live, you name it. NOTHING here is as good as in their country.

While some of this is true, and merits acknowledgement, which I admit, the fact remains that they don't hold up a critical mirror to themselves.

They are some of the most cold-hearted, judgmental skinflints on the planet. They live in a small town where the population has no diversity and consider it heaven on earth, despite all their b.s. about inclusiveness and tolerance.

I am especially galled when they like to criticize us, but then come here for a vacation and are more than happy to take advantage of our generosity.

One relative spent two weeks being wined, dined and entertained on our dime and never once offered to pick up the tab - despite their significant income and assets. Our cuisine is so awful but they had no problem scarfing all those free meals down especially at restaurants!

They have zero consideration for the sacrifices Americans made just one generation ago to save their asses. All those pretty white crosses with American boys' names in those European graveyards? Yawn. Mention the Marshall Plan? They are expressionless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The thing that annoys me the most is my European relatives' condescending attitude and arrogance when it comes to the US.

They tilt their noses in the air and look down at Americans like we are some sort of sub-species and can NEVER be as fit, fashionable or intelligent as they are. They subtly criticize what we do, what we eat, how we live, you name it. NOTHING here is as good as in their country.

While some of this is true, and merits acknowledgement, which I admit, the fact remains that they don't hold up a critical mirror to themselves.

They are some of the most cold-hearted, judgmental skinflints on the planet. They live in a small town where the population has no diversity and consider it heaven on earth, despite all their b.s. about inclusiveness and tolerance.

I am especially galled when they like to criticize us, but then come here for a vacation and are more than happy to take advantage of our generosity.

One relative spent two weeks being wined, dined and entertained on our dime and never once offered to pick up the tab - despite their significant income and assets. Our cuisine is so awful but they had no problem scarfing all those free meals down especially at restaurants!

They have zero consideration for the sacrifices Americans made just one generation ago to save their asses. All those pretty white crosses with American boys' names in those European graveyards? Yawn. Mention the Marshall Plan? They are expressionless.

It's because they are entitled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In a healthy democracy, there should be room in public discourse for criticism of that democracy. Period.

THIS.
I mean I live in NYC and if someone says NYC needs to work on dealing with the mental health issue and homelessness, I'd be like - yes. you are 100% correct.
I just dont get these people who are like - what do you even MEAN gun crime is a problem? go home if you don't like child homicide.
JFC.

But the problem is we do not have a healthy democracy right now. The vast majority of voter support sensible gun control and our elected officials do nothing. The vast majority of voters are pro-choice yet our politicians do not reflect this fact. The vast majority of Americans want affordable housing, healthcare, daycare, and a good public education system but again what are our elected official focusing on?!

Yeah, but someone from another country commenting on this is pointless, unless their motive is to say try what we have (i.e. totalitarianism or communism).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The thing that annoys me the most is my European relatives' condescending attitude and arrogance when it comes to the US.

They tilt their noses in the air and look down at Americans like we are some sort of sub-species and can NEVER be as fit, fashionable or intelligent as they are. They subtly criticize what we do, what we eat, how we live, you name it. NOTHING here is as good as in their country.

While some of this is true, and merits acknowledgement, which I admit, the fact remains that they don't hold up a critical mirror to themselves.

They are some of the most cold-hearted, judgmental skinflints on the planet. They live in a small town where the population has no diversity and consider it heaven on earth, despite all their b.s. about inclusiveness and tolerance.

I am especially galled when they like to criticize us, but then come here for a vacation and are more than happy to take advantage of our generosity.

One relative spent two weeks being wined, dined and entertained on our dime and never once offered to pick up the tab - despite their significant income and assets. Our cuisine is so awful but they had no problem scarfing all those free meals down especially at restaurants!

They have zero consideration for the sacrifices Americans made just one generation ago to save their asses. All those pretty white crosses with American boys' names in those European graveyards? Yawn. Mention the Marshall Plan? They are expressionless.

As someone who also has many European relatives, I feel this so much. They come over here, never contribute in any way while they take advantage of our hospitality and criticize everything about the US. You can't hand them a cup of coffee without them immediately explaining how much better coffee is in their country (spoiler alert: it's not).

I'm fit by any measure. The one time that a doctor talked to me about my weight, it was to advise me to gain weight. I've had a European woman who was 100 lbs overweight lecture me about how fat Americans are. They truly believe we are not worth even the most basic of courtesies. It was this exchange that finally broke the camel's back, and I said, why are you saying this to me when I'm objectively quite slim and you're not? That seemed to work. More recently, I explained to a European relative that in America, it's considered horribly rude to go to a country and then criticize it openly to your hosts. This seemed to cause them to reflect because, actually, that is rude in every country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of you are making valid points about people whining and criticising. Fair enough. But I go back to OP’s original point “It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT.”

The key word is ANYTHING. If I say I think American coffee is horrible, I guarantee there will be posters telling me to go back to my own country and that there are millions of people clustered at the border who are desperate to come so American coffee must be great (okay, I made the last bit up but you get my point).

Just to use your own example - if you were French and I (an American) was visiting France and told you how horrible the French coffee is, what would your reaction be? Insert any country, btw. The point is, you DO NOT go to someone else's country and proceed to tell them how bad it is, even if you're just talking about the coffee. This should be obvious, btw.

Honestly, if I was back in Australia and you were an expat living there and said you hated the coffee, the college system, mandatory voting, vegemite or whatever, I might ask you about it or engage in robust debate but why would I be insulted? No place is perfect and everyone has different tastes and predilections. Where does this extreme sensitivity to criticism come from?

I do get that relentless whining or endless comparisons are tedious/annoying, and that tone and delivery matter, but that’s not what this post was originally about.

Are expats who have lived here a long time allowed to voice the same criticisms that everyone else does on DCUM or is that just seem as ingratitude for the privilege of living in the US?

Vegemite is a war crime.

Vegemite is life!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The thing that annoys me the most is my European relatives' condescending attitude and arrogance when it comes to the US.

They tilt their noses in the air and look down at Americans like we are some sort of sub-species and can NEVER be as fit, fashionable or intelligent as they are. They subtly criticize what we do, what we eat, how we live, you name it. NOTHING here is as good as in their country.

While some of this is true, and merits acknowledgement, which I admit, the fact remains that they don't hold up a critical mirror to themselves.

They are some of the most cold-hearted, judgmental skinflints on the planet. They live in a small town where the population has no diversity and consider it heaven on earth, despite all their b.s. about inclusiveness and tolerance.

I am especially galled when they like to criticize us, but then come here for a vacation and are more than happy to take advantage of our generosity.

One relative spent two weeks being wined, dined and entertained on our dime and never once offered to pick up the tab - despite their significant income and assets. Our cuisine is so awful but they had no problem scarfing all those free meals down especially at restaurants!

They have zero consideration for the sacrifices Americans made just one generation ago to save their asses. All those pretty white crosses with American boys' names in those European graveyards? Yawn. Mention the Marshall Plan? They are expressionless.

Yep yep yep +1000 times - you are talking about my relatives from a non-european country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:m’eh….I’ve seen a fairly broad cross section of the world - certainly not all of it, but a representative sample, let’s call it - and I’ve always been happy to come back here.

I can like America better than anywhere else without diminishing everywhere else. Just because I like America more doesn’t necessarily mean I think the UK (or many other places) sucks.

But yeah, America is pretty great.

Your premise is untrue.

If you visit most countries, people who live there generally do not appreciate being criticized by tourists or migrants. This is not unique to Americans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of you are making valid points about people whining and criticising. Fair enough. But I go back to OP’s original point “It BAFFLES me that any time you say anything about America is sub par, Americans FREAK OUT.”

The key word is ANYTHING. If I say I think American coffee is horrible, I guarantee there will be posters telling me to go back to my own country and that there are millions of people clustered at the border who are desperate to come so American coffee must be great (okay, I made the last bit up but you get my point).

Just to use your own example - if you were French and I (an American) was visiting France and told you how horrible the French coffee is, what would your reaction be? Insert any country, btw. The point is, you DO NOT go to someone else's country and proceed to tell them how bad it is, even if you're just talking about the coffee. This should be obvious, btw.

Honestly, if I was back in Australia and you were an expat living there and said you hated the coffee, the college system, mandatory voting, vegemite or whatever, I might ask you about it or engage in robust debate but why would I be insulted? No place is perfect and everyone has different tastes and predilections. Where does this extreme sensitivity to criticism come from?

I do get that relentless whining or endless comparisons are tedious/annoying, and that tone and delivery matter, but that’s not what this post was originally about.

Are expats who have lived here a long time allowed to voice the same criticisms that everyone else does on DCUM or is that just seem as ingratitude for the privilege of living in the US?

Vegemite is a war crime.

Vegemite is life!

I’m not the least offended that non-Aussies don’t like vegemite. More for the devotees. The NY airport authorities once tried to confiscate the Australian Foreign Minister’s vegemite though, which was clearly very offensive and no way to treat an esteemed ally.