What is even the point of private schools?

[Anonymous]

This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

Sad to see parents flush hundreds of thousands down the toilet for something that has minimal effect on overall learning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

Sad to see parents flush hundreds of thousands down the toilet for something that has minimal effect on overall learning.

Uh what? My kids do 90% of their learning at school…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe a better question is, is private school worth $50-60k compared to maybe hiring a tutor for your kid.

And the answer, as any economist who has ever run an optimization problem knows, depends on your budget and what you're looking for (what goes into your "demand" curve).

Do you have a spare $120k for two kids and you won't really notice it's gone? Or does sending your kid to private school mean you're not funding your retirement or their 529 account? If the latter, go public.

Then there's the demand side. Given that we've decided that private school no longer gets your kid into Yale, what else are people looking for in a private school? If it's learning how to capitalize (which is nonsense, so let's say it's learning how to write essays, although publics do teach that too), a tutor can teach your kid that for a fraction of the cost. The answer also depends on non-quantifiable things that go into the demand curve. Like, I have to imagine, getting your kid away from those declasse public school kids so your kid can learn how to shake hands. Or something. What else? Is it in-depth study of the Coming of Age novel (hello NCS) or religion? Can your kid wait until college or do that through your house of worship?

I’ll take your question as an honest inquiry, though your tone suggests you may not be open to any different view.

In my family’s experience private school is a luxury, no different than buying a fancy car when an old Honda would get you to the same places. You have a different experience in the fancy car though, and if you can’t afford it or don’t value that you should absolutely stick with the Honda.

At the beginning of freshman year the college counseling team reached out to my daughter individually to talk through course selection and extracurriculars that would most likely lead her to a college she would enjoy. They have regular individual meetings throughout her four years to walk her through every step of the selection and application process, including mock interviews and multiple essay reviews. Classes are small and teachers are given time during the day to meet with students about anything they need so it’s hard to slip through the cracks or get behind. Recommendation letters are easy to come by.

Sports, clubs, and arts enrichment activities are plentiful and have room for all students who are encouraged to join. They have multiple opportunities for school trips overseas and individual or small group internships while in high school.

There are ridiculous daily indulgences that we laugh about, like the variety of lattes available at the school cafe and the occasional sushi chef that comes to the cafeteria. I don’t think anyone is just paying for the oat milk lattes they enjoy in the gazebo though the campus is beautiful and there are several intentionally inviting indoor and outdoor spots where my daughter will sit for an hour with friends.

All of the things I hear from my neighbors in our local public about assaults, drugs in the bathrooms, overcrowding, unavailable administrators, etc are not part of our experience. Maybe none of that is worth it to you, I think my kids will end up in the same colleges as many of their public school friends. I’m pretty sure they’ve had a different experience in high school getting there and that’s worth the money to me.

So basically a Country Club for the kids of wealthy parents? I hope she has a nice trust fund because I have no idea how your DD will compete in the working world.

Lol. Sick burn. Because we all know kids of private schools never can compete in the real world. I hope you can afford to buy your kid a nice leaf blower.

The scholarship kids are crushing it in the real world. Latte McSushi is flushed out within five years.

Sadly this is really not true, there is much less income and class mobility in the US than most people think and those scholarship kids are paying off their loans into their 40s. Connections and specific social skills matter a lot. Having a nice cafe and cafeteria in high school won’t help or hurt anyone in their later college or working life but it does make the high school experience more pleasant than being in a school where you avoid certain spots based on the likelihood of getting assaulted.

It’s not the nice cafeteria, it’s a level of coddling and scaffolding that is woefully out of touch with how the world works. Latte McSushi, who has never had to compete for a spot on high school clubs won’t even be able to join clubs in College.

What you consider coddling and scaffolding I think of as appropriate support and guidance. At our school there is no retaking tests and late homework is penalized, unlike the grade inflation that prevents our local public school kids from having any hurt feelings over anything less than a 4.6 gpa. I get it though, you’d rather have your kid in a school with 1-2 college counselors for 700 seniors so they aren’t coddled and I want my kid in a class of less than 100 with 6 college counselors working closely with each student. It sounds like we’re each where we belong, best of luck to all of our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

What a narrow-minded way of looking at things. In the real world, most job responsibilities involve interacting and collaborating with others...usually peers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

Sad to see parents flush hundreds of thousands down the toilet for something that has minimal effect on overall learning.

Why waste all the hours that kids are in school? We make them count. Of course we also have the same time at home and make that count as well.

Why would you assume public school kids are the only ones who learn outside of school?

A good school would have them above grade level through school hours alone though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This again

We do private for the small class sizes ( 13-16) and the lack of violence. DD is in MS and doing well. My goal is not for her to get into a top Ivy it’s to enjoy learning and get an education. My friends son at a mcps MS had witnessed 3 fights already and they’ve only at school for 2 weeks.

+1, we are applying to private for HS. Smaller class sizes, an ability to discipline and not tolerate poor behavior. I'm not talking about chair-throwing, I'm talking about basic requirements to sit in your seat, listen to the teacher and do the work. The expectations of the students is above the bare minimum that it is in public.

Our zoned HS has a number of counselors but only one who is officially title the college counselor for 700+ kids. Unless you're top of the top, the average kid is getting little to no attention. "Based on your scores and gpa here's the list of schools you should apply to. Good luck." At the end of the day the academics may or may not be much better than would be available at our supposedly highly rated public, but the overall experience is bound to be a more positive one which counts for a lot.

yes, that's what you are buying because public schools cannot not accept a child who cannot sit still in class or who doesn't do their hw.

Public schools accept everyone, private schools don’t take disruptive kids and they are pretty insistent about homework.

And they have basic rules in private school, so that the kids are not just sitting in class scrolling on their cell phones all day. That’s what I see kids doing at the public school I work at. My kids are in private and are required to keep their phones in their lockers all day and made to participate in class discussions.

That itself is worth it to me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

What a narrow-minded way of looking at things. In the real world, most job responsibilities involve interacting and collaborating with others...usually peers.

Which is why public schools are better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This whole thread (and subgroup) is stupid. If you do the math, kids spend very little time in “school” (and even less being taught in the classroom, after you net out all the BS activities). Most substantive learning occurs at HOME — by parents or private tutors, etc.

What a narrow-minded way of looking at things. In the real world, most job responsibilities involve interacting and collaborating with others...usually peers.

Which is why public schools are better.

The comparison of public vs private school fails to capture the complexity of differences between individual schools and fit for an individual child.

This is like saying public colleges are better than private colleges. It just isn’t meaningful of helpful.

[Anonymous]

There are actually several points in our family’s choice of private school:

1. High expectations of students in academics and personal conduct
2. General sense of orderliness
3. Personalized attention from teachers, staff, and admin
4. Safety
5. Opportunities for spots in clubs and sports teams that are severely limited in the local big-box, overcrowded public
6. Cleanliness of facility
7. No phones allowed during class time
8. No drugging or vaping in bathrooms
9. Transparent curricula
10. Teachers actually grade work w/commentary
11. Misbehaving students face consequences. Three strikes = expulsion
12. Uniforms

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are actually several points in our family’s choice of private school:

1. High expectations of students in academics and personal conduct
2. General sense of orderliness
3. Personalized attention from teachers, staff, and admin
4. Safety
5. Opportunities for spots in clubs and sports teams that are severely limited in the local big-box, overcrowded public
6. Cleanliness of facility
7. No phones allowed during class time
8. No drugging or vaping in bathrooms
9. Transparent curricula
10. Teachers actually grade work w/commentary
11. Misbehaving students face consequences. Three strikes = expulsion
12. Uniforms

+1 I couldn’t agree more. And it’s sad that our top rated public couldn’t provide the above for my children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This again

We do private for the small class sizes ( 13-16) and the lack of violence. DD is in MS and doing well. My goal is not for her to get into a top Ivy it’s to enjoy learning and get an education. My friends son at a mcps MS had witnessed 3 fights already and they’ve only at school for 2 weeks.

+1, we are applying to private for HS. Smaller class sizes, an ability to discipline and not tolerate poor behavior. I'm not talking about chair-throwing, I'm talking about basic requirements to sit in your seat, listen to the teacher and do the work. The expectations of the students is above the bare minimum that it is in public.

Our zoned HS has a number of counselors but only one who is officially title the college counselor for 700+ kids. Unless you're top of the top, the average kid is getting little to no attention. "Based on your scores and gpa here's the list of schools you should apply to. Good luck." At the end of the day the academics may or may not be much better than would be available at our supposedly highly rated public, but the overall experience is bound to be a more positive one which counts for a lot.

And what do you think happens when your kid gets a job? You think Google has a career counselor providing an individualized plan to your kid for how to climb the career ladder or even keep their job?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are actually several points in our family’s choice of private school:

1. High expectations of students in academics and personal conduct
2. General sense of orderliness
3. Personalized attention from teachers, staff, and admin
4. Safety
5. Opportunities for spots in clubs and sports teams that are severely limited in the local big-box, overcrowded public
6. Cleanliness of facility
7. No phones allowed during class time
8. No drugging or vaping in bathrooms
9. Transparent curricula
10. Teachers actually grade work w/commentary
11. Misbehaving students face consequences. Three strikes = expulsion
12. Uniforms

Sweet snowflakes need to be protected. Should prepare them well for life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are actually several points in our family’s choice of private school:

1. High expectations of students in academics and personal conduct
2. General sense of orderliness
3. Personalized attention from teachers, staff, and admin
4. Safety
5. Opportunities for spots in clubs and sports teams that are severely limited in the local big-box, overcrowded public
6. Cleanliness of facility
7. No phones allowed during class time
8. No drugging or vaping in bathrooms
9. Transparent curricula
10. Teachers actually grade work w/commentary
11. Misbehaving students face consequences. Three strikes = expulsion
12. Uniforms

Sweet snowflakes need to be protected. Should prepare them well for life.

My kid who went to private now makes a 7-figure salary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are actually several points in our family’s choice of private school:

1. High expectations of students in academics and personal conduct
2. General sense of orderliness
3. Personalized attention from teachers, staff, and admin
4. Safety
5. Opportunities for spots in clubs and sports teams that are severely limited in the local big-box, overcrowded public
6. Cleanliness of facility
7. No phones allowed during class time
8. No drugging or vaping in bathrooms
9. Transparent curricula
10. Teachers actually grade work w/commentary
11. Misbehaving students face consequences. Three strikes = expulsion
12. Uniforms

Sweet snowflakes need to be protected. Should prepare them well for life.

My kid who went to private now makes a 7-figure salary.

how much of the private to college to job pipeline was due to family connections?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe a better question is, is private school worth $50-60k compared to maybe hiring a tutor for your kid.

And the answer, as any economist who has ever run an optimization problem knows, depends on your budget and what you're looking for (what goes into your "demand" curve).

Do you have a spare $120k for two kids and you won't really notice it's gone? Or does sending your kid to private school mean you're not funding your retirement or their 529 account? If the latter, go public.

Then there's the demand side. Given that we've decided that private school no longer gets your kid into Yale, what else are people looking for in a private school? If it's learning how to capitalize (which is nonsense, so let's say it's learning how to write essays, although publics do teach that too), a tutor can teach your kid that for a fraction of the cost. The answer also depends on non-quantifiable things that go into the demand curve. Like, I have to imagine, getting your kid away from those declasse public school kids so your kid can learn how to shake hands. Or something. What else? Is it in-depth study of the Coming of Age novel (hello NCS) or religion? Can your kid wait until college or do that through your house of worship?

I’ll take your question as an honest inquiry, though your tone suggests you may not be open to any different view.

In my family’s experience private school is a luxury, no different than buying a fancy car when an old Honda would get you to the same places. You have a different experience in the fancy car though, and if you can’t afford it or don’t value that you should absolutely stick with the Honda.

At the beginning of freshman year the college counseling team reached out to my daughter individually to talk through course selection and extracurriculars that would most likely lead her to a college she would enjoy. They have regular individual meetings throughout her four years to walk her through every step of the selection and application process, including mock interviews and multiple essay reviews. Classes are small and teachers are given time during the day to meet with students about anything they need so it’s hard to slip through the cracks or get behind. Recommendation letters are easy to come by.

Sports, clubs, and arts enrichment activities are plentiful and have room for all students who are encouraged to join. They have multiple opportunities for school trips overseas and individual or small group internships while in high school.

There are ridiculous daily indulgences that we laugh about, like the variety of lattes available at the school cafe and the occasional sushi chef that comes to the cafeteria. I don’t think anyone is just paying for the oat milk lattes they enjoy in the gazebo though the campus is beautiful and there are several intentionally inviting indoor and outdoor spots where my daughter will sit for an hour with friends.

All of the things I hear from my neighbors in our local public about assaults, drugs in the bathrooms, overcrowding, unavailable administrators, etc are not part of our experience. Maybe none of that is worth it to you, I think my kids will end up in the same colleges as many of their public school friends. I’m pretty sure they’ve had a different experience in high school getting there and that’s worth the money to me.

So basically a Country Club for the kids of wealthy parents? I hope she has a nice trust fund because I have no idea how your DD will compete in the working world.

I’m not the PP. I find this real working world idea ridiculous. I work in the real world and you know what I have literally never encountered in the working world: people overdosing in bathrooms. Physical fights in the workplace on a regular basis. Knives and other weapons brought to work. Bathrooms that are not filthy, and that I’m not afraid to enter. I never have had to plan out when I drink water so I don’t have to pee. I have not been physically threatened. But my oldest child encountered all of that in his good public school district.

It’s honestly astonishing to me how many parents are apparently fine with their children going to school in circumstances that would be intolerable in their own workplaces.