All boys school...why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

This says it all. For whatever reason the parents at STA that have daughters at schools other than NCS have a very strange chip on their shoulder about NCS. I don't get it. I think they are envious that their daughters are not part of the experience on the close and have some regrets and justify it by attacking a school of young women. I am happy I do not feel that animosity toward any school. To each your own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All boys schools doesnt mean no interaction with girls and doesn’t mean bad behavior. Lot of stereotypes here, OP. Stop generalizing.

At an all boys school, meaning a school without girls, there is zero interaction with girls. If you want to say that everywhere but school there is interactions with girls, fine. But even that would be nuts to say. Get up in the morning, go to an all boys school, maybe go to practice after school (most likely Not a coed team) then go home after school. Unless they are going out and doing things they shouldn't be on a school night, WHERE ARE THERE GIRLS IN THAT DAY!

My son has classes with girls at the all girls school his school is associated with.

He also has a number of classes taught by excellent teachers that also happen to be women.

if he is in class with girls all day every day, I wouldn't call that an all boys school.

The poster didn’t say “all day.”

However, some single sex schools have joint classes and programs with their sister schools.

STA has “coordinate” classes with NCS starting in 7th. Chinese is taught at NCS for example.

Theater, chorus, crew, and many other activities are joint.

so some have some classes, others zero classes with girls. Got it. And the kids need to join choir and crew. Got it. So when they should be working to be better at crew or singing it's ok to be around girls, but not for working to get better at other things, ok. So at the end of the day, is it better to be in a single sex environment or not? If it is why have girls in crew or choir? Honest question. I say it's not better for whatever that's worth.

It is better for the majority of learning to happen in a single sex environment. It’s better for both girls and boys. Look up the studies.

Boys’ executive functioning develops much later than girls. Especially in 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, and 9th, girls are more mature, have greater focus, and can sit for longer periods without breaks. Education has been feminized; teaching norms are now geared towards what comes more easily to girls. The majority of teachers are women, which exacerbates this trend.

Putting boys in a learning environment where the teachers get boys is a tremendous academic advantage. The teaching is geared towards how boys learn best. It also makes a difference that the majority of teachers are male.

In an all boys environment the boys are freer to experiment with different activities and hobbies with no gender bias. A large number of STA boys are in the performing arts or visual artists. There’s no stigma. You might have a football star who paints or is the lead in a musical. The boys are allowed to try any role they want without gender stereotypes holding them back.

In my co-Ed high school chorus, music, and art were for sissies and geeks if you were a boy. Not true at all at STA.

Chorus, theater, and crew are coordinate because of economies of scale issues and to facilitate social interaction, not because doing them coed helps the kids do them better.

so why are the best high schools in the country coed?

Can’t read, huh? Asked and answered.

so the best schools in the country are coed but kids do not learn better in coed schools. Got it.

Don’t engage with this troll. They have replied multiple times and are too dumb to even disguise their sock puppeting. I’m sure you figured it out, but here is how you know it’s them:
1) they don’t capitalize
2) they don’t use apostrophes
3) they use “Got it” and “honest question” over and over again
4) they lack critical thinking skills
5) they appear to be the proud recipient of a coed public school education

[Anonymous]

Everyone at STA and NCS seem like absolute peaches to be around. Yikes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone at STA and NCS seem like absolute peaches to be around. Yikes.

Don't judge us all. It is mostly the poster that has 2 boys at STA and a daughter elsewhere (not a NCS) that continuously posts over and over again. So happy she did not send her daughter to NCS! Sounds so judgmental of young girls. Weird!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone at STA and NCS seem like absolute peaches to be around. Yikes.

Don't judge us all. It is mostly the poster that has 2 boys at STA and a daughter elsewhere (not a NCS) that continuously posts over and over again. So happy she did not send her daughter to NCS! Sounds so judgmental of young girls. Weird!

Agreed! Her generalizations based on what she heard for a couple of friends speak about her intelligence enough…

Speaking as a BVR parent, we hear always great things about NCS and mostly good things about STA. The one negative I keep hearing about is that the parent community at STA is very standoffish.

STA students do seem very polite and nice. Sports and academics also seem to have a nice balance so we plan to send our son there.

[Anonymous]

My two sons graduated STA and one of my daughters graduated NCS while our youngest still attends NCS. All that to say the above poster with the daughter who didn't attend NCS sounds malinformed at best and it's more likely a case of bittercakes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

If this is true poster there are literally a handful of families that have 2 boys at STA and came from Beauvoir and sent Beauvoir daughter elsewhere. Your poor boys you just insulted many of the families in their small community that have sisters at NCS. We know many families that have kids at both schools.

[Anonymous]

Wow what a bunch of unlikable people you are. Grow up, the lot of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

This says it all. For whatever reason the parents at STA that have daughters at schools other than NCS have a very strange chip on their shoulder about NCS. I don't get it. I think they are envious that their daughters are not part of the experience on the close and have some regrets and justify it by attacking a school of young women. I am happy I do not feel that animosity toward any school. To each your own.

Why would they be envious? Your statement assumes the girls didn’t get in. We were at STA for years hearing stories about NCS from NCS parents who also had boys at STA. DD had a cohort of friends from Beauvoir who chose other schools.

NCS has major issues: pressure cooker environment, grade deflation, leadership issues, hyper competitiveness, and mental health issues among the girls that can create some seriously weird drama. Girls who do crazy sh*t and are asked ro leave for “medical reasons.”

Many smart girls prefer a different environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

If this is true poster there are literally a handful of families that have 2 boys at STA and came from Beauvoir and sent Beauvoir daughter elsewhere. Your poor boys you just insulted many of the families in their small community that have sisters at NCS. We know many families that have kids at both schools.

Aren’t you a smart mama! So you got the poster! Good for you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

This says it all. For whatever reason the parents at STA that have daughters at schools other than NCS have a very strange chip on their shoulder about NCS. I don't get it. I think they are envious that their daughters are not part of the experience on the close and have some regrets and justify it by attacking a school of young women. I am happy I do not feel that animosity toward any school. To each your own.

Why would they be envious? Your statement assumes the girls didn’t get in. We were at STA for years hearing stories about NCS from NCS parents who also had boys at STA. DD had a cohort of friends from Beauvoir who chose other schools.

NCS has major issues: pressure cooker environment, grade deflation, leadership issues, hyper competitiveness, and mental health issues among the girls that can create some seriously weird drama. Girls who do crazy sh*t and are asked ro leave for “medical reasons.”

Many smart girls prefer a different environment.

Something is very off about your posts and they are not believable. Sounds like you have an agenda and axe to grind and are a bit unstable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

This says it all. For whatever reason the parents at STA that have daughters at schools other than NCS have a very strange chip on their shoulder about NCS. I don't get it. I think they are envious that their daughters are not part of the experience on the close and have some regrets and justify it by attacking a school of young women. I am happy I do not feel that animosity toward any school. To each your own.

Why would they be envious? Your statement assumes the girls didn’t get in. We were at STA for years hearing stories about NCS from NCS parents who also had boys at STA. DD had a cohort of friends from Beauvoir who chose other schools.

NCS has major issues: pressure cooker environment, grade deflation, leadership issues, hyper competitiveness, and mental health issues among the girls that can create some seriously weird drama. Girls who do crazy sh*t and are asked ro leave for “medical reasons.”

Many smart girls prefer a different environment.

Something is very off about your posts and they are not believable. Sounds like you have an agenda and axe to grind and are a bit unstable.

+1. From what I hear from parents that have kids at BVR and at the other Cathedral schools, they all love STA and NCS, but particularly NCS.

Of course these are competitive and intense schools and they are not for everyone. NCS was definitely the right choice for my girls that are very academically oriented. I am not sure STA will be right choice for my son… he is still young and we have a couple of years to decide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

quoting you "but his impression is that many of the girls spout feminist ideas that they have not really thought about themselves, and they are combative in class and seem very unhappy and stressed academically."

Combative. Feminist. Sounds like how the STA boys used to like to put down NCS girls back in the 90s!

I'll grant you stressed academically is accurate. NCS is harder than STA and the girls work much harder than their counterparts at STA.

Why is described by someone as feminist a put down? My son’s sisters would describe themselves that way. However, repeating traditional feminist ideas without having explored them with intellectual rigor suggests more of a “following the party line” than independent thinking.

So STA boys still look down on/ are cowered by NCS girls.

It appears that nothing has changed since the ‘80s.

I’m a feminist and mom of two STA boys. I would not say the boys are in any way cowed by NCS girls.

The cultures of the two schools are quite different. The STA boys learn early on to have respectful conversations that leave their interlocutors with dignity, respecting their basic humanity even if they disagree. You disagree with the position, you don’t disrespect the person.

The NCS girls are taught that being strong means disparaging the other person to the point of cancellation. If you disagree with a “correct” position, you should be crushed like a bug. There is no distance between the position and the person.

This is what I believe the other mom’s sons meant when they said the NCS girls are “combative.”

My children went to Beauvoir, have friends among the NCS girls, and I know and love some of the NCS girls. However, they have been growing in a different intellectual culture. NCS is decidedly dominated by more left-of-center thinking and I’d probably feel more comfortable in that parent community. I’d be surrounded by people who agree with me. The disadvantage of that environment is that it allows the girls to become mired in groupthink.

STA is more politically diverse. It also explicitly teaches respectful, considerate debate and asks the boys to learn how to take on difficult issues without disparaging one another. That is a valuable life skill and is one of the many things about STA that makes the tuition more than worthwhile to me and my husband. That’s not to say there isn’t any groupthink among members of the STA community but the boys are challenged to challenge themselves and one another - politely and with brotherhood in mind.

BVR, NCS (and STA hopeful) parent here. How do you know this about NCS girls? How can you claim to be a feminist and the putting down a whole community of girls? Is this what kids learn at STA? I guess it’s good that you don’t have daughters.

My boys are friends with NCS girls. We (gasp) occasionally have them in our home and I overhear them discuss issues, debate, and this is what I’ve observed. I’d say my comments are less about the girls and more about the teaching culture at NCS.

Based on the way the girls debate, they have not been taught to do so with the same kind of consideration for their opponents/interlocutors that the boys at STA are. I’ve heard NCS girls use ad hominem and personal attacks in a way that I do not see in STA boys of the same age.

I do have a daughter. She does not attend NCS.

I will observe that you have used the same style of argument that I’ve observed in NCS girls: jumping to conclusions (assuming I don’t have a daughter), unfounded accusations confusion (how dare you attack an entire community of girls; I observed a style of argument/debate not the girls themselves), misplaced attribution (as a mom I obviously don’t attend STA so the question “Is this what kids learn at STA?” makes no sense; you’re attributing to STA and its boys an observation made by a female parent whose education could not have occurred at STA).

Thank you for so perfectly exemplifying what I was trying to convey.

This says it all. For whatever reason the parents at STA that have daughters at schools other than NCS have a very strange chip on their shoulder about NCS. I don't get it. I think they are envious that their daughters are not part of the experience on the close and have some regrets and justify it by attacking a school of young women. I am happy I do not feel that animosity toward any school. To each your own.

Why would they be envious? Your statement assumes the girls didn’t get in. We were at STA for years hearing stories about NCS from NCS parents who also had boys at STA. DD had a cohort of friends from Beauvoir who chose other schools.

NCS has major issues: pressure cooker environment, grade deflation, leadership issues, hyper competitiveness, and mental health issues among the girls that can create some seriously weird drama. Girls who do crazy sh*t and are asked ro leave for “medical reasons.”

Many smart girls prefer a different environment.

Something is very off about your posts and they are not believable. Sounds like you have an agenda and axe to grind and are a bit unstable.

+1. From what I hear from parents that have kids at BVR and at the other Cathedral schools, they all love STA and NCS, but particularly NCS.

Of course these are competitive and intense schools and they are not for everyone. NCS was definitely the right choice for my girls that are very academically oriented. I am not sure STA will be right choice for my son… he is still young and we have a couple of years to decide.

This is funny, I hear the love of STA is much stronger and it’s such a great experience etc etc. so many different perspectives.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:All boys schools doesnt mean no interaction with girls and doesn’t mean bad behavior. Lot of stereotypes here, OP. Stop generalizing.

At an all boys school, meaning a school without girls, there is zero interaction with girls. If you want to say that everywhere but school there is interactions with girls, fine. But even that would be nuts to say. Get up in the morning, go to an all boys school, maybe go to practice after school (most likely Not a coed team) then go home after school. Unless they are going out and doing things they shouldn't be on a school night, WHERE ARE THERE GIRLS IN THAT DAY!

My son has classes with girls at the all girls school his school is associated with.

He also has a number of classes taught by excellent teachers that also happen to be women.

if he is in class with girls all day every day, I wouldn't call that an all boys school.

The poster didn’t say “all day.”

However, some single sex schools have joint classes and programs with their sister schools.

STA has “coordinate” classes with NCS starting in 7th. Chinese is taught at NCS for example.

Theater, chorus, crew, and many other activities are joint.

so some have some classes, others zero classes with girls. Got it. And the kids need to join choir and crew. Got it. So when they should be working to be better at crew or singing it's ok to be around girls, but not for working to get better at other things, ok. So at the end of the day, is it better to be in a single sex environment or not? If it is why have girls in crew or choir? Honest question. I say it's not better for whatever that's worth.

It is better for the majority of learning to happen in a single sex environment. It’s better for both girls and boys. Look up the studies.

Boys’ executive functioning develops much later than girls. Especially in 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, and 9th, girls are more mature, have greater focus, and can sit for longer periods without breaks. Education has been feminized; teaching norms are now geared towards what comes more easily to girls. The majority of teachers are women, which exacerbates this trend.

Putting boys in a learning environment where the teachers get boys is a tremendous academic advantage. The teaching is geared towards how boys learn best. It also makes a difference that the majority of teachers are male.

In an all boys environment the boys are freer to experiment with different activities and hobbies with no gender bias. A large number of STA boys are in the performing arts or visual artists. There’s no stigma. You might have a football star who paints or is the lead in a musical. The boys are allowed to try any role they want without gender stereotypes holding them back.

In my co-Ed high school chorus, music, and art were for sissies and geeks if you were a boy. Not true at all at STA.

Chorus, theater, and crew are coordinate because of economies of scale issues and to facilitate social interaction, not because doing them coed helps the kids do them better.

so why are the best high schools in the country coed?

Can’t read, huh? Asked and answered.

so the best schools in the country are coed but kids do not learn better in coed schools. Got it.

Don’t engage with this troll. They have replied multiple times and are too dumb to even disguise their sock puppeting. I’m sure you figured it out, but here is how you know it’s them:
1) they don’t capitalize
2) they don’t use apostrophes
3) they use “Got it” and “honest question” over and over again
4) they lack critical thinking skills
5) they appear to be the proud recipient of a coed public school education

To pre-empt the comment you will want to make after you read this: I am not the poster you can’t resist responding to.

Unclear why you would make the bolded comment. Did your favorite poster say anything to compare public to private? Isn’t this a conversation about coed vs. single sex? Are you using public education as an insult?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone at STA and NCS seem like absolute peaches to be around. Yikes.

Agree. And it’s more than the one poster.