Drugs in College

[Anonymous]

My18 year old son is heading for College in the Fall and I'm worried about drug usage while away.

We have caught him a few times using marijuana, he was honest and told me. We were shocked, of course, and he was grounded each time. We've had many conversations about drugs/weed, but he thinks we're over reacting and thinks is not a big deal. We disagree.

Now that he's heading for college we hope he makes the right choices, but we're worried that with new freedom he will not.

From experiences, has drug usage affected your kids' college life? grades?

How to handle this? Just pray that he makes good choices?

[Anonymous]

He is definitely going to use marijuana in college. Try to wrap your head around that reality. You can't stop him. You haven't been able to stop him even when he's living in your house.

[Anonymous]

Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

[Anonymous]

Adding to others: Monitor the bank account for clues he's becoming a buyer or seller.

Sorry you have this added stressor to the already stressful leaving home process.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your kid will turn out like mine, went to enough parties freshman year, watched others and themself make f g fools out of themselves using pot and then decided not to hang around that crowd. Plus there were a couple suspicious overdoses with tainted drugs and that scared her to death! As a girl mom I'm more worried about "rufie" which has happened to my DD. She just got lucky and a friend noticed the behavior change and got her out of there safely, thank God. And no, everyone does not do it regardless of what people on this site tell you, he has a choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

It is also good to know, and to tell our kids, that no, not everybody's doing it, so you don't have to do it either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

You seem to be justifying that your kid and their friends are doing illegal drugs. You can't honestly believe that all 20,000 kids at a given college are doing drugs. They aren't. A large crowd of them, but not even half. Statistics say 44% for pot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

It is also good to know, and to tell our kids, that no, not everybody's doing it, so you don't have to do it either.

This is true, unfortunately peer pressure to be "cool" is really strong on college campuses. It takes a special kind of "strong" to not care what others think or are doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

Careful…some of these psychedelics cause delusional thinking later in life. I would discourage all except pot. I agree it’s impossible for you to control, but they should know the dangers

[Anonymous]

This is probably a hot take here, but it always seems weird to me when people have not experimented with drugs at all. I think it is a normal thing to do. Drug use itself isn't necessarily bad if done in a safe environment. Addiction is horrendously bad, but everyone here has probably been out with friends recently, watching everyone sip wine, and thought nothing of it -- and alcohol ruins more lives than (other) drugs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe your kid will turn out like mine, went to enough parties freshman year, watched others and themself make f g fools out of themselves using pot and then decided not to hang around that crowd. Plus there were a couple suspicious overdoses with tainted drugs and that scared her to death! As a girl mom I'm more worried about "rufie" which has happened to my DD. She just got lucky and a friend noticed the behavior change and got her out of there safely, thank God. And no, everyone does not do it regardless of what people on this site tell you, he has a choice.

Btw, this happened to my DS also. It's not just girls who are slipped the date rape drug. I was at my DD's parent weekend not too long ago and waiting in the hotel lobby late one evening to go grab a coffee with her and witnessed two mothers dragging one of their daughters through the hotel lobby after being out at the bars. This girls was completely out of it and it was horrifying to witness. I told my DD about what I had seen and she told me it's the norm, just hopefully you are out with friends and one person is designated driver of sorts who doesn't indulge that evening and watches out for the group and is responsible for getting everyone home safely. She told me when that it her turn for the evening she won't just drop someone at their dorm or apartment, she walks them to the door and puts them to bed. I hate that this list the world we now live in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is probably a hot take here, but it always seems weird to me when people have not experimented with drugs at all. I think it is a normal thing to do. Drug use itself isn't necessarily bad if done in a safe environment. Addiction is horrendously bad, but everyone here has probably been out with friends recently, watching everyone sip wine, and thought nothing of it -- and alcohol ruins more lives than (other) drugs.

No thank you. I had enough friends in high school who used pot and then graduated to heroin. I have no interest, not now, never will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is probably a hot take here, but it always seems weird to me when people have not experimented with drugs at all. I think it is a normal thing to do. Drug use itself isn't necessarily bad if done in a safe environment. Addiction is horrendously bad, but everyone here has probably been out with friends recently, watching everyone sip wine, and thought nothing of it -- and alcohol ruins more lives than (other) drugs.

No thank you. I had enough friends in high school who used pot and then graduated to heroin. I have no interest, not now, never will.

No one is going to force heroin on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is probably a hot take here, but it always seems weird to me when people have not experimented with drugs at all. I think it is a normal thing to do. Drug use itself isn't necessarily bad if done in a safe environment. Addiction is horrendously bad, but everyone here has probably been out with friends recently, watching everyone sip wine, and thought nothing of it -- and alcohol ruins more lives than (other) drugs.

Many of us have experimented but realize modern drugs are much more dangerous with more risk of being tampered with.

You are delusional if you think a glass of wine is the same as mushrooms, Molly, pills and whatever else. It sounds like you are trying to rationalize use.

I have a glass of wine when I go out to dinner. Barely feel a buzz. It’s not anywhere near using illicit drugs. I smoked tons of pot in college, but luckily had the good sense to stay away from other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most parents need to remove blinders and face reality. Drugs ARE EVERYWHERE on college campuses. Pot is the least of it. Molly, Coke, Shrooms. The best you can do is create an open, safe-enough environment where your kid will tell you what he is doing, has done this past weekend, plans to do at the festival, etc. For example, I know my DC has done Pot, Molly, Shrooms, but refuses to do any cocaine and absolutely will not inject anything. DC's friends tell me what they are up to too. Those same friends don't tell their parents who are clueless. DC knows from our discussions that they can call me anytime, any hour, they can call 911 and get an ambulance anytime, meaning don't be afraid that I'll find out from the insurance statement, just go get medical help and always be safe. If you aren't having these conversations with your kid, your kid will definitely be the 9 in 10 who keep it from the parents.

You seem to be justifying that your kid and their friends are doing illegal drugs. You can't honestly believe that all 20,000 kids at a given college are doing drugs. They aren't. A large crowd of them, but not even half. Statistics say 44% for pot.

As if kids are going to be honest in any kind of survey that would result in reported stats.
Look, I want my kid (and their friends) to be safe. So I chose a stance of - rather than come in with any judgment on the topic that would scare them or shut them down, I let them talk, I express my concerns and viewpoints (no, I don't justify it, condone it, wtaf pp), and I tell them to watch out for each other, to be safe. If you want to live in the land of De Nile, and pretend that your prince or princess is pollyanna perfection, avoid the topic altogether. IDRC.