Teacher called...for a third time

Anonymous
DS is 16 and a sophomore. His grades are not the best and we've been course correcting since the start of the school year. We have suspected that he is not paying attention in class and not motivated. We've received 3 phone calls throughout the year about DS not paying attention, being disruptive, using earbuds and being on his phone. We took the phone today and there was some action (snap), but not a whole lot. We did find a VPN app.

We are absolutely heartbroken that after multiple conversations, intervention (tutoring twice a week) and consequences that DS is just not getting it. He is not taking school seriously and the disrespectful attitude is appalling to us. Today we received the 3rd call and we're determined to make it crystal clear to DS this time around.
Other than the issues above, DS is generally respectful at home, does not do drugs/drink and is generally enjoyable to be around.

What would you do?
Anonymous
It might not be his fault, School were closed for two years, and they want kids to act like nothing happened. It might have something to do with the school closer, and he might still think he is the same grade it was when they decided to closed down for two years. The kids are acting out because they don't know how to act or if they are going to be shut down again.
Anonymous
Can't you go in the phone settings and brick his phone during the school day? That at least removes the ear buds and being on his phone during class time.
Anonymous
Stories like these make me mad. Not being defensive as my kids have never gotten in trouble due to this, but why are all teachers not having students put phone on a table up front when they get into class? It is like baiting kids to be distracted when taking the phones away removes the distraction. I have zero patience for helpless teachers like these not implementing a simple solution.
Anonymous
Take the phone and only sports and activities until the grades improve. Monitor school work.
Anonymous
In your place I would take away his phone. If he needs a phone for call/ text while getting to and from school, you could get him a "dumb" phone.

He has to earn his technology privileges back once he meets the benchmarks you set - be it a certain grade for each class and no notifications from school, or whatever.
Anonymous
Is this a new problem this year or did you see similar difficulties last year?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Stories like these make me mad. Not being defensive as my kids have never gotten in trouble due to this, but why are all teachers not having students put phone on a table up front when they get into class? It is like baiting kids to be distracted when taking the phones away removes the distraction. I have zero patience for helpless teachers like these not implementing a simple solution.


Because kids steal each other's phones, or they get burner phones and keep theirs, or parents have a fit about kids not having their phones, or administration tells you it's not allowed because they are afraid of parents.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Stories like these make me mad. Not being defensive as my kids have never gotten in trouble due to this, but why are all teachers not having students put phone on a table up front when they get into class? It is like baiting kids to be distracted when taking the phones away removes the distraction. I have zero patience for helpless teachers like these not implementing a simple solution.


Because kids steal each other's phones, or they get burner phones and keep theirs, or parents have a fit about kids not having their phones, or administration tells you it's not allowed because they are afraid of parents.


My kids go to a very normal non wealthy area public and there is a policy allowing teachers to take phones. Some teachers have a group charging station and that’s a big hit. You cannot both be afraid of parents and call them repeatedly to complain about a problem you are complicit in creating. Young minds are not equipped to deal with the temptation and addiction.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Stories like these make me mad. Not being defensive as my kids have never gotten in trouble due to this, but why are all teachers not having students put phone on a table up front when they get into class? It is like baiting kids to be distracted when taking the phones away removes the distraction. I have zero patience for helpless teachers like these not implementing a simple solution.


We cannot enforce that. When kids refuse, I cannot take their phones from them. Admin doesn’t have time or the inclination to do so.
Anonymous
Take the phone and the earbuds away. Consequences need to happen. My 8th grader was wearing airpods around school and the VP called and I took them away for a few months. He learned his lesson. I also told my son that I don't care what everyone else does, he is not allowed to have his phone out during school.

If this is MCPS I do think that part of the problem was Covid. I learned that the school did not enforce the no electronics, phones or airpods until this year to give the kids a break and get them back into the classroom. I think they should have enforced the rules all along rather than allowing it and then switching course.
Anonymous
Do your think your DS is depressed? Have you been able to have a calm conversation about it, while driving or in another low-key environment? Are you expressing your concern and worry about him?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Stories like these make me mad. Not being defensive as my kids have never gotten in trouble due to this, but why are all teachers not having students put phone on a table up front when they get into class? It is like baiting kids to be distracted when taking the phones away removes the distraction. I have zero patience for helpless teachers like these not implementing a simple solution.


We cannot enforce that. When kids refuse, I cannot take their phones from them. Admin doesn’t have time or the inclination to do so.


Another teacher here. A coworker of mine was put on leave for taking a phone. That is absolutely against policy. We can nicely and repeatedly ask students to put them away. That’s it. There’s no penalty at all for using phones at our high school, so naturally they are out regularly.

The students who don’t have their phones out are the ones who report their parents check on their phone usage. It seems that the only thing that works at our school is hoping that students have engaged parents.
Anonymous
Public or Private school OP?
Is this new behavior or not?
Anonymous
Is it possible your kid has ADHD that never got diagnosed?
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