Wife is hurtful

[Anonymous]

In how cold she is toward me. We've gone through rough times together but I'm trying to be open and work on things. But she's just cold and distant and doesn't seem to want a relationship any longer and from the conversations we've had she has said as much. I do love her. Any recommendations on what to do?

[Anonymous]

Counseling or just rip the band aid off and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In how cold she is toward me. We've gone through rough times together but I'm trying to be open and work on things. But she's just cold and distant and doesn't seem to want a relationship any longer and from the conversations we've had she has said as much. I do love her. Any recommendations on what to do?

So you messed up, but expect her to get over it immediately when you decide to start "working on it".

My recommendation is to give her time to process the rough times and let her be while she's at it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In how cold she is toward me. We've gone through rough times together but I'm trying to be open and work on things. But she's just cold and distant and doesn't seem to want a relationship any longer and from the conversations we've had she has said as much. I do love her. Any recommendations on what to do?

So you messed up, but expect her to get over it immediately when you decide to start "working on it".

My recommendation is to give her time to process the rough times and let her be while she's at it.

You're assuming that OP caused the rough times.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean by “rough times?” What was your role in the marriage that led to this situation? You can’t get out of it without knowing how you got into it.

[Anonymous]

How many times have you been hurtful and cold when she tried to work on things? You're finally ready and just expect her to snap to attention? Ridiculous.

Find a therapist for yourself. Tell your wife you're working on yourself, and suggest couples therapy for the both of you.

[Anonymous]

Need more information.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In how cold she is toward me. We've gone through rough times together but I'm trying to be open and work on things. But she's just cold and distant and doesn't seem to want a relationship any longer and from the conversations we've had she has said as much. I do love her. Any recommendations on what to do?

What part of "no" do you not understand? She told you how she feels.

[Anonymous]

Seems like you missed your chance to repair. Women don't wait forever. If you're only a good husband when the threat of divorce is imminent, you're not a good husband at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In how cold she is toward me. We've gone through rough times together but I'm trying to be open and work on things. But she's just cold and distant and doesn't seem to want a relationship any longer and from the conversations we've had she has said as much. I do love her. Any recommendations on what to do?

So you messed up, but expect her to get over it immediately when you decide to start "working on it".

My recommendation is to give her time to process the rough times and let her be while she's at it.

So Ms. Reading comprehension problem.
Exactly where does it say he has messed up?

[Anonymous]

Need more information, but generally, keep trying. We've had relationship ruts before, and at different times one of us pulled the other back through kind words, acts of service, gifts, initiating intimacy, and sometimes giving the other person space. There's usually a way back.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your wife already told you she does not want to repair the relationship. I read somewhere that when a woman is done with a relationship, there is little or no hope for repair because she's already given all she could to repair it prior to getting to that point. I don't know if this is an issue that's come up over and over and that was done like you've had affairs or if this is her first time being like this. Or first time you did or she did whatever it is that messed up be the relationship.

[Anonymous]

I would just leave her. Assuming you are a man, if genders were reversed everyone would say just leave. Why be with someone who doesn't want to be with you?

[Anonymous]

Leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave.

This.