pathetic partners

[Anonymous]

Seriously, I'm tired of seeing posts of adults (mostly women) posting about how they are tired; or there aren't enough hours in the day; or how they need to find something out so they can go on a trip; to lunch etc because their partner (mostly men) is incompetent.

I just saw one on here saying poor pathetic husband/man child has ADHD. ADHD is not an excuse for not doing laundry or being able to look up on a website if school is cancelled.

Share this with your friends who have these pathetic, pathetic men who are so smart big attorneys; making so much money; having so many degrees to live in DC but can't seem to know how to make a basic dinner for their own children.

https://www.demilked.com/chores-comic-robert-the-otter/

There are a lot of gen Z men showing how they don't add to their wife's emotional burden. One is a dad saying how he doesn't ask his wife if the muffins are too hot for their 2 year old because he's an adult and can see the steam coming off them; he knows he can cut it up on a plate to cool it faster and to let them cool before giving it to a small child. He doesn't bother his wife who is doing whatever else (it doesn't matter what - work; play; vegging out) with a stupid question that diverts her focus and adds to her mental labor for existing.

There are so many amazing dads in our lives that when I see one being a shit or acting like its not his responsibility/job/ I rage. This feigned incompetence is absurd. Here is to all the women not raising boys to be men like this solo because their dads are pathetic. And here is to all the men who do what they are suppose to do and don't act like buffons when the wife screams from her flu "can you make them a pbj" and he has no idea where the peanut butter is.

[Anonymous]

I've got a teenage son. He knows where everything goes in the kitchen, even the more rarely used cooking implements. He knows the best way to load the dishwasher to make sure everything gets clean.

Still working on him letting me know (because i do the weekly grocery shopping) when he's getting low on something he eats/cooks with, as opposed to when he's run out. But it's a work in progress. Trying to raise someone who'll be an equal partner.

[Anonymous]

As usual women will blame men for everything despite the fact that lesbians divorce at a higher rate then any type of couple

[Anonymous]

Weaponized incompetence is real, and not just something men do.

[Anonymous]

Feminists are not plotting to destroy men. But feminists also tell women that they DESERVE a lot of things. The issue is the belief that one gender DESERVES things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Weaponized incompetence is real, and not just something men do.

I see a mom in our school group doing this weaponized incompetence. She never gets the newsletters; never knows what's going on at school and then doesn't chat with anyone; talk to the school about getting the lists.

Her husband is always there; her husband takes the kid to the doctor.

100% its not just men; but with home/family/kld things I hear about it more with the dads. BTW at our school the dads and moms are great (except the one above)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Feminists are not plotting to destroy men. But feminists also tell women that they DESERVE a lot of things. The issue is the belief that one gender DESERVES things.

My friend deserves a husband who knows to move their two year olds wet clothes from the snow off the hardwood floors; or he can stay home with the contractor repairing them when they warm and find the money to pay for it.

That is not a lot of things.

No one believes one gender deserves all the things. But when you haven't seen real partnerships work then him putting his dish in the dishwasher or even knowing how to run it makes it feel like she's getting all the things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As usual women will blame men for everything despite the fact that lesbians divorce at a higher rate then any type of couple

Maybe this is because lesbians inherently don't believe they need a partner to have a life (money, house, kids) and they won't tolerate bullshit.

[Anonymous]

We only hear some parts from from one party and without knowing both versions and more detail, its not fair to come to conclusions. However, that's the nature of these forums and reason crowdsourcing can't fix poster's problems. They sure get different perspectives, anecdotes and resources to help them figure it out themselves.

As far as home chores, parenting issues, mental load and all, our system is flawed, unless there is one SAHP or full time hired help, two career families are set up for turbulence and failure.

We need a more supportive and flexible system where employers aren't overwhelming employees and providing medical, maternal, paternal, caregiver leaves to make it possible for people to balance personal and professional lives. More than 70% of marital problems are related to lack of time, resources and patience which leads to resentment, anxiety, anger etc.

[Anonymous]

If two college educated people are working full time, their income should be enough to support a full time house help and a live in nanny.

[Anonymous]

If two college educated people are working full time, their income should be enough to support a full time house help and a live in nanny.

what planet are you on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If two college educated people are working full time, their income should be enough to support a full time house help and a live in nanny.

what planet are you on?

If society wants people to be happy, healthy, functional and productive, we need to push for better distribution of profits and benefits between employers and employees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We only hear some parts from from one party and without knowing both versions and more detail, its not fair to come to conclusions. However, that's the nature of these forums and reason crowdsourcing can't fix poster's problems. They sure get different perspectives, anecdotes and resources to help them figure it out themselves.

As far as home chores, parenting issues, mental load and all, our system is flawed, unless there is one SAHP or full time hired help, two career families are set up for turbulence and failure.

We need a more supportive and flexible system where employers aren't overwhelming employees and providing medical, maternal, paternal, caregiver leaves to make it possible for people to balance personal and professional lives. More than 70% of marital problems are related to lack of time, resources and patience which leads to resentment, anxiety, anger etc.

Or people need to change their standards. Don't tell me you haven't time to over decorate your house with the latest holiday (my fav is non Irish overdoing shamrocks); having the house spotless; home cooked meals etc. If you want all that and he or she doesn't care then don't complain the other adult isn't helping.

I see these videos of moms on the TikTok about how they clean after dinner or clean the bathroom every day, etc and I can't believe anyone (SAHM or not) has the time or need to do that. But they can do them and over clean and spend their time scrubbing a clean floor vs. reading or watching tv with their families.

My sister has to do a full court press meal every night. Her husband doesn't care. He cleans up after but he's not helping her with chopping and shopping for it. I don't see a problem with that. But he also doesn't demand or expect her too and would probably prefer she cuts back a bit and they can just order pizza (he btw can order pizza, I've seen him do it).

[Anonymous]

This despite the fact that men mostly do way more domestically than the men of "the Greatest Generation."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As usual women will blame men for everything despite the fact that lesbians divorce at a higher rate then any type of couple

Maybe this is because lesbians inherently don't believe they need a partner to have a life (money, house, kids) and they won't tolerate bullshit.

Or...WWW (White Western Women) are just insufferable to be around. I am divorced from a WWW who was an overweight blob and got remarried to a beautiful Brazilian who is much nicer and takes care of herself. She's an angel with my kids too...

My ex worked part time and still couldn't find time to do anything around the house, and I handled all the outdoor stuff, the car stuff and ensured maintenance of our core house stuff (AC, Heating, Appliances). All she had to do was pick up after the kids and couldn't even do that.

I'm much better off.