Should I text my dead friends mom tmr (epiphany)?

[Anonymous]

My friend (mid 30s) passed away almost a year ago. Her family celebrates christmas tomorrow. I'm wondering if I should text her a greeting or if that will just remind her of her dead daughter more?

For more - we aren't super close, but I helped her mom while daughter was in the hospital, and she asked me to help clean out daughters house.

I am really really bad with death and even just writing this is making me tear up. I dont want to make anything harder for her, but maybe a nice wish would be a nice thought?

[Anonymous]

She absolutely has not forgotten about her daughter. Of course you should text her a greeting. Ideally you might even text her a positive memory of her daughter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She absolutely has not forgotten about her daughter. Of course you should text her a greeting. Ideally you might even text her a positive memory of her daughter.

OP here - even if ive never texted her an xmas greeting before? It would be the first time, we dont have that *type* of relationship, I just know I'm thinking about my friend and her family during this time.

[Anonymous]

I’m sure she’ll be very touched, OP.

[Anonymous]

I am 100% she would be thrilled to hear from you. She will be thinking of her daughter whether you text or not. She will be touched and happy to hear that other people remember her daughter as well.

[Anonymous]

She will appreciate hearing someone is thinking of her beloved daughter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend (mid 30s) passed away almost a year ago. Her family celebrates christmas tomorrow. I'm wondering if I should text her a greeting or if that will just remind her of her dead daughter more?

For more - we aren't super close, but I helped her mom while daughter was in the hospital, and she asked me to help clean out daughters house.

I am really really bad with death and even just writing this is making me tear up. I dont want to make anything harder for her, but maybe a nice wish would be a nice thought?

People who are grieving the loss of a loved one are already suffering from sadness, and this type of communication will not make someone more sad.
I have learned this through countless losses of my own, and many discussions with other friends.

Your gesture is kind and rooted from love of your friend.
I am sorry for your loss, and I’m sorry death is difficult for you (for everyone!)
Your friend’s mom may appreciate knowing that her daughter is not forgotten, especially around holiday time.

[Anonymous]

Don't text her a greeting - text and tell her you're thinking about her family today. Share a memory, share that you always think about your friend on 1/6 because you know it's when her family celebrates Christmas and how sorry you are that she's not there. Share that you miss her. It will mean a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't text her a greeting - text and tell her you're thinking about her family today. Share a memory, share that you always think about your friend on 1/6 because you know it's when her family celebrates Christmas and how sorry you are that she's not there. Share that you miss her. It will mean a lot.

+ 1 if you feel comfortable doing this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 100% she would be thrilled to hear from you. She will be thinking of her daughter whether you text or not. She will be touched and happy to hear that other people remember her daughter as well.

This. I emphatically agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't text her a greeting - text and tell her you're thinking about her family today. Share a memory, share that you always think about your friend on 1/6 because you know it's when her family celebrates Christmas and how sorry you are that she's not there. Share that you miss her. It will mean a lot.

+1 to this but also be sure it's a complete text that doesn't make her feel like she has to respond. No questions. Just share your thoughts and kind words and she can respond if she wants, but know that even if she doesn't respond it likely meant a great deal to her in a positive way. I lost a child and I truly appreciate the people who reach out with kind words on important days.

[Anonymous]

I guarantee she didn’t forget her daughter. She thinks of her many, many times a day. I know my family would appreciate an “I’m thinking of you and Larla today” text.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She absolutely has not forgotten about her daughter. Of course you should text her a greeting. Ideally you might even text her a positive memory of her daughter.

OP here - even if ive never texted her a xmas greeting before? It would be the first time, we dont have that *type* of relationship, I just know I'm thinking about my friend and her family during this time.

Md onto text her a Christmas greeting. She’s likely not having a merry Christmas. Tell her you are thinking of her and missing her daughter.

[Anonymous]

A card might be better than a text that she might feel she needs to reply to. I am sorry for your loss, OP, and think it’s very sweet of you to remember your friend and reach out to her mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She absolutely has not forgotten about her daughter. Of course you should text her a greeting. Ideally you might even text her a positive memory of her daughter.

+1
Yes, do this because she is thinking about her every 5 minutes anyway and let the next thought be of something special and good