Just curious
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Anonymous
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Do your adult daughters do more for you (aging parents) than you sons?
This was definitely the case for my family of origin, but I am discouraged to see it continuing into the younger generation!!! Why can’t we evolve, and raise males who step up (as parents, spouses and adult children)?!😡 |
Anonymous
| Nope. Well, it's not like I need them for anything other than wanting to spend time with them. My husband and I are only in our mid 40's/early 50's and don't need help. We just want to spend time with them. DS comes over more often than DD. |
Anonymous
| I know I do almost everything for my parents and my brother is MIA. Part of it might be who he is married but I still blame him. |
Anonymous
| So for my parents, they relied/listen to my brothers on big issues. Like the need to move to assisted living. |
Anonymous
| I think, in part, because brothers weren't afraid to make them mad. 8:53 again. |
Anonymous
"Step up"? That's a foreign concept in America or kids who grew up in America. |
Anonymous
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FYI: This is a much better title for your post than "Just curious":
Do your adult daughters do more for you (aging parents) than you sons? |
Anonymous
Well, an American posted the question…so you can step generalizing about what an entire nation’s citizens do and think. |
Anonymous
Thanks. But I am actually not in an English class, so don’t need feedback on my writing. Who is to say which title would attract more eyeballs? |
Anonymous
My youngest brother does the most for my mom so no its not a given but yes in most families women are default caregivers. |
Anonymous
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I'm not a native English speaker and actually appreciate it when someone actually corrects my mistakes instead of just criticizing or patronizing but I get OP's point. Internet forums aren't for correcting language mistakes. If you understood, reply, if not, move on. Its not a requirement to reply just because someone posted something. No need to get offended and start ESL lessons. |
Anonymous
| Imho immigrant posters bring a fresh perspective and add interest to these forums. |
Anonymous
| Yes, that is true of my ILs and in my own family. One brother doesn't seem to care, but the other one at least sends money since I do all the driving around, etc. My husband does way more to help. |
Anonymous
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It's a mix among families and friends I know.
My dad did more for his mom than his sister. I also have a childhood friend who cared for his mom until the end while his sister was MIA. My MIL has 3 daughters and 2 sons. All are devoted to her, but DH says he sees the way his sisters care for her and just knows that he and his brother don't measure up. The sisters think of things that would never occur to the brothers and they give more time and mental energy to MIL. My brother and I are similar. I cared for our parents better (time, proximity, emotional support, little things that bring them joy, etc). My brother stepped to task on the big things: flying in on a moment's notice when needed. But the day to day stuff mostly fell on me. I have 2 boys. If I get wistful that I didn't have a daughter (it happens once in a blue moon), I remind myself that I didn't have kids for what they can do for me. |
Anonymous
That's a funny thing to say given the fact that your question is based on generalization. |