drop off party - 2nd grade

[Anonymous]

My 2nd grader was invited to a bday party at a play venue, I had my other child with me also and assumed it was drop off. I was told no parents need to stay but I had already planned to take my other child to a different event. I explained to the host that I had to bring my other child somewhere and apologized for assuming it was drop off but they were visibly annoyed. Do people expect parents of second graders to spend hours of their afternoon at a play venue for birthday parties?

[Anonymous]

When I lived in ny, we all stayed because it was a time for parents to socialize. There was always wine for parents, no matter what time of the day. But if a parent couldn’t stay, it was no big deal.

I live in a smaller town now, and no one stays for kids’ parties at this age- i think after k or 1st, it’s assumed that kids will be dropped off. Especially a play venue! I wouldn’t sweat it. And the hosts might have been extra annoyed because you were likely not the only parent to assume it was drop off!

[Anonymous]

Maybe it was a miscommunication and they thought you had shown up expecting to have the sibling play too, but now you’re mad because you have to take sibling elsewhere during party? Or they weren’t annoyed at you, just harried from the party hosting. Just thinking from their POV.

[Anonymous]

This happened to me to! I was expected to stay to watch my nine year old (who can stay home alone if necessary BTW). I should've known because she is the nervous mom type. But there I sat, staring at my phone, while my kid ignored me the entire time. I was really annoyed.

[Anonymous]

Very strange. By 1st grade all parties in my circle are assumed drop off, only exception being a swim party.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't expect that, but if it comes up again and your kid will truly be fine without you, ask a parent you're friendly with who is staying if they wouldn't mind keeping an eye on your kid too and offer to reciprocate at another party.

[Anonymous]

If it's a public play venue, parched of 7 yo usually stay because there just not enough coverage for little kids in public spaces

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it's a public play venue, parched of 7 yo usually stay because there just not enough coverage for little kids in public spaces

Then you need to clarify that or bring along your own friends or family to chaperone your child's party. Unless you've spelled it out, it's pretty presumptuous to assume that families of elementary schoolers are going to hang out and chaperone at your child's birthday party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't expect that, but if it comes up again and your kid will truly be fine without you, ask a parent you're friendly with who is staying if they wouldn't mind keeping an eye on your kid too and offer to reciprocate at another party.

+1. Children mature at different rates. I no longer host birthday parties because the parents of the most difficult kids drop and run. We do trips for birthdays now.

[Anonymous]

I'd ask another parent to watch your child. I learned if I ask if I can drop off, the host will say no. But many other parents don't ask, their kids arrive by carpool with another parent. Of course this is if your child is ok with you not being there.

[Anonymous]

As long as the kids behave, I don't mind parents dropping off. One of DD's friends needed to be dropped off an hour early when DD was turning 8. The two girls wound up entertaining the 3 yr old and helping to set things out (backyard party). She was lovely, and a joy to have around. I told her parents to feel free to drop her off anytime. Not all kids are like that - some will run through a house tearing it up. Those kids need supervision.

[Anonymous]

I love drop offs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't expect that, but if it comes up again and your kid will truly be fine without you, ask a parent you're friendly with who is staying if they wouldn't mind keeping an eye on your kid too and offer to reciprocate at another party.

+1. Children mature at different rates. I no longer host birthday parties because the parents of the most difficult kids drop and run. We do trips for birthdays now.

This is so true. I try to be inclusive (and we are relatively new to a community that's all been together going back to preK or even earlier), but man the difficult kids that I secretly don't want to invite anyway are the worst guests:

1) RSVP yes and skip
2) RSVP yes 1-2 days before
3) Drop at the door and run away
4) Give used or clearly regifted presents (which I'd be fine with if family seemed lower end to average of income, but looking at how they present themselves, doesn't seem to be the case; they just wanted to give a thoughtless gift)

We will probably stick with all class or all-gender parties anyway, just to build up more social ties for my kid, but sheesh.

[Anonymous]

They probably thought you were trying to bring the sibling.

I have 3 kids. Youngest is currently in first grade. Usually when I drop off, I ask another parent to keep an eye on her for me.

[Anonymous]

Wow that’s crazy. I had people drop off at venue parties in K and 1st. What is there to do at Sky Zone or whatever in terms of “supervising” a 7 or 8 year old?