Quote from Maud Hart Lovelace, the author of the Betsy-Tracy books.
I try to give my 6yo a similar childhood - very few structured activities, lots of free time especially outdoors, minimal screens, minimal expectations other than manners and helping at home - and I will still fail because nobody else does the same. We have a neighborhood full of kids but those kids are either in activities or on screens at home. Playgrounds sit empty on weekends. You can’t just run up to someone’s house on a weekday afternoon or weekend and ring their doorbell because chances are they won’t be around. It sucks, but oh well, I try my best. And my DD is a generally happy, cheerful kid so I guess there are other ways to have a happy childhood. |
Start a commune or intentional community. |
Literally have a headache from how hard this post made me roll my eyes. |
You sound judgmental and just because that was one person's experience does not mean it is everyone's. Some kids love activities and thrive on structure. What's wrong with activities? |
Your kid will be a basic bum |
Loneliness is not good for the child. They need to be with other kids too. Do you have an extensive net of family and friends so that your kid is well socialized? I think putting your kid in a few activities will help them to make a few friends and have some shared experiences. Plus, they will become more skilled and assured. Otherwise, you are doing great and I am sure your kids will benefit by the attention you pay them. |
Why are you deciding that what will make your child happiest is to run around your street playing with random neighbors? My kid is genuinely happy and has after-school classes almost each day. And we live in the city on a busy street so there's absolutely no going outside without an adult, even at 8. |
I ended up putting my kids in lots of activities because I realized all of the kids my kids want to play with are in extended day or other activities. There is literally nobody around for my kids to play with. It is sad. |
Thank you, for making my day!!! |
Extended day is actually close to what OP seems to be looking for - unstructured play time with other kids, mostly outdoors as weather permits. |
Oh please, of course kids can have a happy childhood without this exact experience, but it would be nice if kids and teens could experience this. No, there is nothing wrong with activities, but there nothing wrong with not having them either. But, there is alot wrong with overscheduling and too much screen time. |
You sound insufferable. |
It’s Betsy-Tacy, not Tracy. |
OP. I get that it sounds pretentious but I feel the same exact way. And anyone who equates extended day with a childhood full of agency, modest risk and spontaneity (plus nature, animals and strong traditions) is misguided. Luckily you just need to find one or two similarly minded parents and you can accomplish a lot.
Once I found a neighbor who shared my deep yearning to give this type of life to my children I got a lot closer, even in the city. Just going on a hike with someone who isn’t obsessed with risk-management was a breath of fresh air. Parents who either aren’t hypochondriacs or are determined not to pass it on to their kids. Parents who are happiest when their kids are messiest, digging for worms and playing with sticks. Most of my dearest friends don’t fit this description but a few do, thank goodness! |
My parents refused activities as they were too selfish to pay for them, despite having the money or taking us regularly. I would have loved to take classes in a few of my interests. |