My sibling blocked my #

[Anonymous]

I have 5 siblings and we have a group text. One of our siblings has been inactive and unresponsive for a few months. Their spouse is being treated for stage 3 cancer. Today, my older sister came for that sibling on the group text and used shaming and a guilt trip to get a reaction. I responded in defense of my sibling and was given the same treatment along with being cussed out. A different sibling requested we stop and I apologized for my part in arguing. My older sister sent this response: "I have blocked Larla (me). She is dead to me." In a nutshell, we were raised in a dysfunctional, abusive and (for some of us) neglectful home by an alcoholic and a narcissist, who enabled each other to the detriment of us kids. I have broken the cycle in my own little family, but obviously I still have issues because I engaged. What do I do now? Block her back? Reach out from a different number? Celebrate my freedom from a narcissistic bully? Thanks for any advice or support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have 5 siblings and we have a group text. One of our siblings has been inactive and unresponsive for a few months. Their spouse is being treated for stage 3 cancer. Today, my older sister came for that sibling on the group text and used shaming and a guilt trip to get a reaction. I responded in defense of my sibling and was given the same treatment along with being cussed out. A different sibling requested we stop and I apologized for my part in arguing. My older sister sent this response: "I have blocked Larla (me). She is dead to me." In a nutshell, we were raised in a dysfunctional, abusive and (for some of us) neglectful home by an alcoholic and a narcissist, who enabled each other to the detriment of us kids. I have broken the cycle in my own little family, but obviously I still have issues because I engaged. What do I do now? Block her back? Reach out from a different number? Celebrate my freedom from a narcissistic bully? Thanks for any advice or support.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

[Anonymous]

Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

Thanks. I have distanced myself in the past. After a periods of quiet and peace, she reaches out with a grand gesture and acts like nothing happened. I am not able to set boundaries with her that she will observe and which I can maintain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

Thanks. I have distanced myself in the past. After a periods of quiet and peace, she reaches out with a grand gesture and acts like nothing happened. I am not able to set boundaries with her that she will observe and which I can maintain.

I'm sorry and know what you mean. I set boundaries and then get all caught up in the drama again. Meanwhile, I know the certain sibling is trashing me because they trash their spouse, child, my spouse, etc. Their behavior is exhausting.

I hope you can find some peace.

[Anonymous]

Are you guys Italian by chance? I married into a family like this. MIL once said this to DH. You are dead to me. I was horrified. He said this was normal. So if that’s your family, then continue how you have, but after that, I took MiL at her word and kept her at arm’s length.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

Thanks. I have distanced myself in the past. After a periods of quiet and peace, she reaches out with a grand gesture and acts like nothing happened. I am not able to set boundaries with her that she will observe and which I can maintain.

I'm sorry and know what you mean. I set boundaries and then get all caught up in the drama again. Meanwhile, I know the certain sibling is trashing me because they trash their spouse, child, my spouse, etc. Their behavior is exhausting.

I hope you can find some peace.

Thanks and I hope you find peace, too. I just want to have a respectful sibling relationship with no cussing out or public humiliation.

[Anonymous]

The answer is C.

Happy holidays!!!

[Anonymous]

Ha, I love it when my crazy sister blocks me. Then I get 3-5 months of peace until it starts all up again. Just ignore and enjoy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

Also, it’s not possible to block someone who has blocked you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just let this go. You don’t have to block her back. Be happy for every day you don’t hear from her. If she ever reaches out, you can decide what to do.

Also, it’s not possible to block someone who has blocked you.

I didn't know that, because I have never been informed that I was being blocked...until today. Her publicly announcing it was special. So, I can still read her contributions to the group texts or no? Did she block me after she wrote that she blocked me? It would be great to not have to read her rants. I feel relieved and I'm looking forward to a quiet holiday season.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you guys Italian by chance? I married into a family like this. MIL once said this to DH. You are dead to me. I was horrified. He said this was normal. So if that’s your family, then continue how you have, but after that, I took MiL at her word and kept her at arm’s length.

We're Irish Catholic. This type of behavior is part of the family ethos. The troyble first arose when I quit drinking and started therapy. I could no longer tolerate the dysfunction. We weren't raised well so none of us knows how to relate to each other in a healthy way.

[Anonymous]

I’m glad you have therapy—that was going to be my suggestion. It’s so very hard to relate to your siblings in a “normal” loving and rational way when your formative experiences in your birth family were so effed up. You should be very proud that you have been able to break that cycle with your chosen family. I’m sending you hugs and support. Hoping that you find a way to manage this situation—and find true peace perhaps by distancing yourself from your sisters gradually but with healing intention.

[Anonymous]

PS Is it possible your sister was drunk? That kind of behavior sounds like an abused substance was the trigger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have 5 siblings and we have a group text. One of our siblings has been inactive and unresponsive for a few months. Their spouse is being treated for stage 3 cancer. Today, my older sister came for that sibling on the group text and used shaming and a guilt trip to get a reaction. I responded in defense of my sibling and was given the same treatment along with being cussed out. A different sibling requested we stop and I apologized for my part in arguing. My older sister sent this response: "I have blocked Larla (me). She is dead to me." In a nutshell, we were raised in a dysfunctional, abusive and (for some of us) neglectful home by an alcoholic and a narcissist, who enabled each other to the detriment of us kids. I have broken the cycle in my own little family, but obviously I still have issues because I engaged. What do I do now? Block her back? Reach out from a different number? Celebrate my freedom from a narcissistic bully? Thanks for any advice or support.

Just respond to her crazy texts with heart emojis