Advice for teen to deal with tough teacher
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Anonymous
| DC is struggling to get help in a HS math class. DC is prone to anxiety, particularly in math, but shown some growth in getting out of their comfort zone in asking for help from the teacher. My question is what advice would you give to get help from a teacher who, when asked how to do a problem, says things like "I already explained that" or "maybe this is not the right math class for you" instead of answering the question. This apparently been said to multiple kids, not just mine. Strict or tough teachers are part of life and I've discussed that with my DC along with giving some advice. But personally (not discussed with DC, mainly just venting here) I feel that this type of response is unusually harsh, does nothing to help my kid learn, has increased DC's anxiety around math, and discouraged DC from asking for much needed help. DC can't switch teachers for the rest of the year unfortunately. I haven't reached out to the teacher nor do I really want to as I'd like to let DC learn how to handle this. Any advice I could give DC? |
Anonymous
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Bleagh!
I hate teachers like that! I have no advice OP, but I've encountered quite a few math teachers like that and they are full of it. |
Anonymous
| I would probably look towards getting outside help either from a tutor or from Khan academy. Is your student asking for help at an appropriate time such as office hours? |
Anonymous
| If there isn’t a textbook or resources on a class web page, I think your DC could email the teacher and ask if the teacher could point DC to any resources/study guides that track the curriculum or would otherwise be helpful that DC could use for extra help/practice. DC could also ask any specific questions he or she may have by email, since maybe (hopefully) he he teacher would respond better than in the moment. |
Anonymous
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Agree with pps that teacher situation not ideal.
Is there a math club or honors math society in the school? If so, they may have weekly (or more) peer tutoring sessions running at lunchtime. My son participated as a tutor in HS and enjoyed helping classmates and others. |
Anonymous
| Get a tutor. Sadly there are lots of teachers like that who should not be teaching. |
Anonymous
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This is not acceptable and these teachers would not get away with it if parents pushed back. I would ask for a meeting with the teacher, the math department chair, and the grade level administrator. Don’t put your anxious kid on the spot here. Report what you understand the problem to be, ask for clarification, and ask the admin what the guidelines are concerning these issues. Be calm and professional. Try to bring notes of when these issues happened.
It’s likely that you are not the first parent to complain. If the situation doesn’t improve, insist that your child to be moved to another class. Nobody needs to put up with this crap. -Teacher |
Anonymous
| Outside help for sure. One of my kids has a similar teacher this year…it happens. Potentially discuss with the counselor if DD feels the need. |
Anonymous
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OP here. Thanks for the replies. It sounds like most people in this situation just give up on getting help from the teacher and resort to outside resources like homework club or a tutor. Is there nothing DC can do to get productive help from the teacher?
DC has said they'll try the peer help. Not sure a professional tutor (like once a week -- don't think we could afford more) would be able to help as often as DC has questions or at least timed right to help for tests. Are people paying for tutors multiple times/week? And to answer a question, DC is asking for help in class (during a break or at the end) which sounds like an appropriate time. I suggested going in at lunch (with advance notice to the teacher) but DC feels intimidated to do that under the circumstances. For the teacher PP: I'm worried that complaining about the teacher would make things worse for DC in class with a teacher who is harsh as is. What would you suggest telling the teacher if I schedule a one-on-one meeting? Reporting what I've heard are the problematic responses to questions (I'm sure the teacher would deny it)? DC is reluctant to mention their anxiety and effect this situation is having because they don't think the teacher would be supportive and I agree. |
Anonymous
+1. This isn't tough. It's lazy. |
Anonymous
There is nothing your child can do to force this teacher to provide additional help, no. Re: A meeting - I'd suggest you tell the teacher pretty much what your kid told you "DC said you told them that you refused to explain the problem again and also questioned if this was the right class for them." I'd like to address both issues. If the teacher denies it then I'd end the meeting and say, "I'm glad we cleared up this misunderstanding. Can you please tell me your office hours for DC to come and request additional help?" You need to channel some assertiveness here and advocate for your kid. High school is an excellent time for them to LEARN to advocate for themselves, but you're still there for backup. |
Anonymous
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Granted my kid is still in Algebra 1 but if he doesn’t know how to do things I Google it and watch videos with explanations. I’ve had math in school so with a little help it all comes back.
I can’t afford anxiety around math so I just do it. |
Anonymous
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My kid has ADHD and we are in the same boat and have also heard in front of all their peers, this might not be the class for you. This is Alg 2 for us.
HS math is really hard and even the smartest kids use khan, honors society, and tutors. If the teacher offers any in person time during the week for questions outside of class time, I would tell your child to always go and ask for help. It might make the teacher more empathetic and help a bit more. Some of these teachers are just hardened by kids that are giving up and not caring. I hope it gets better for you OP |
Anonymous
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I have been in this position as a (poor) math student. I learned to say, "yes, you explained it, but I don't understand it. Can you please teach me again?" And if they tried the same approach, I'd say something along the lines of, "That was the same way you explained it before. I really don't get it. Is there another way to tackle this problem?"
I was a frequent flyer at office hours. Sometimes it helped, sometimes it did not. |
Anonymous
| Is your kid in an advanced math class and doesn’t belong there? Or is she in the slowest class? |