If you could provide for your kids

[Anonymous]

So they never have to go to college or work will you?

My kids are 5 and a few months, and I wouldn’t mind them living with them till I die, why do people want them to move out at a young age?

[Anonymous]

No. Human beings need to be productive. They spiral when they are not.

[Anonymous]

God no. When you have lived with teenagers you'll understand.

Humans are not happy without purpose in life. We're not rich enough for them to be full-time philanthropists, so they will need to do something. And I think my kids would be embarrassed to have no profession.

[Anonymous]

What about the kids of your kids, OP? Who will provide for them?

Your kids need to make their own success. Fine to leave them money but only after they make a life of their own

[Anonymous]

Why do you think your kids would want to live at home with mommy forever?

[Anonymous]

When my now 21-year-old was 5, she told me she did not want to go to college because she did not want to be away from me. (I told her she could still go to college and live at home if she wanted) Now she is not only going to college hours away from home, she will be studying abroad for a semester. She got past her need to be with me all the time, as will your child.

Part of raising a child is giving them the skills they need to take care of themselves and letting them do so. I recommend the book How to Raise an Adult for a perspective on this idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you think your kids would want to live at home with mommy forever?

My 5 year old told me that “mommy, I miss you so Much when you’re at work and I’m at school.”
I know it will change but it’s was so cute..

[Anonymous]

I really like my kids in addition to really loving them but I want them to grow up to be confident, independent, adventurous, curious and successful in whatever they want to do in life. Not codependent and afraid to meet the world.

You can have a great relationship with your adult kids without hanging onto them like that.

[Anonymous]

I know a woman in real life who is essentially trying to make it so her kids never, ever leave home and it is so sad to watch. Mentally healthy parents want to see their kids differentiate and grow and establish their own lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So they never have to go to college or work will you?

My kids are 5 and a few months, and I wouldn’t mind them living with them till I die, why do people want them to move out at a young age?

Most people do not want their 5 year old to move out OP.

[Anonymous]

No, everyone needs a purpose in life. And we raise our kids to contribute to society to make the world better for everyone. Peace starts with finding peace within yourself, then your family, then your circle of friends, acquaintances, community, sphere of academic or professional influence, and for some, who are in fields where it is possible, national, global.

You will not want your children's growth to be stunted and stuck at the family level. You help them struggle through, and you find a way and teach them to be good people throughout. The goal is to get them into the world to continue to do good work.

When I dropped our oldest off at college, I left with incredible joy in my heart and not a single pang of sorrow. Watching him spread his wings and share his gifts, continuing to build new community in a healthy and peaceful way ... I'm in awe and so happy for where he is and what good he can contribute to the world.

[Anonymous]

They need to keep busy. We would probably not like to be together all the time.
I barely see my kids as it is now. Works for us.
As for providing for them, yes, I invested for them high growth and early. It's not so they can sit at home with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So they never have to go to college or work will you?

My kids are 5 and a few months, and I wouldn’t mind them living with them till I die, why do people want them to move out at a young age?

Parenting is about giving children options and skills to live life the way they want, not how we want them to. Parenting is a responsibility and its selfless. Its not a right nor an investment.

If all parents kept kids at home, would they just visit their spouses as spouses's parents would also want their kids to live at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. Human beings need to be productive. They spiral when they are not.

Well, there are probably more ways to be productive which doesn't require a path through daycare, preschool, middle school, high school, college, grad school and 40 years of going to a cubicle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God no. When you have lived with teenagers you'll understand.

Humans are not happy without purpose in life. We're not rich enough for them to be full-time philanthropists, so they will need to do something. And I think my kids would be embarrassed to have no profession.

Its not about embarrassment but fulfillment, which can come in many ways.