If you were the popular kid in school...

[Anonymous]

how's life for you today?
How was it then? Did you hurt others feelings often to keep the status?
Do you feel like it was worth it? Do you regret being mean/nasty to the regular kids?
How is it related to who you're today?

[Anonymous]

I was the Homecoming Queen senior year, Homecoming Princess freshman year, captain of the Lacrosse and Field Hockey team etc... So I guess that qualifies as popular in highschool. But I went to a really small school where everyone knew everyone. And I have to say everyone for the most part was pretty nice to each other. Really no mean girl clique. Up until the crash in our economy life was great and getting bigger and better (now just holding on for dear life). I NEVER EVER intentionally hurt anyone's feelings and would be mortified if I ever had hurt someone's feelings. I've also never had that much interest in status. I don't think popular means you have to be mean or nasty. I think today I still feel popular in that people still seem to like me and seek out my company but popularity has never been something to drive me.

[Anonymous]

I did not have to hurt other people's feelings. Where I come from, popular does not equal mean.

[Anonymous]

So I wasn't popular, and these questions got me wondering. Were the popular kids at my school actually mean, as they seemed to me at the time? Or were they just self-absorbed in their own social networks, and I took their aloofness as being mean? I know that back in middle school I could have listed all the "mean" things they did, but was I just being hypersensitive to typical middle-school slights?

[Anonymous]

Popular wasn't mean at my HS either. Our homecoming queen and student body president, cheeeader, track star, was the sweetest girl--to everyone.

[Anonymous]

In jr. high the most popular girl was very nice but the rest of the girls in her group were hardcore meanie queen bee types.

Went to an all-girls high school and the most popular girl - our class president, student council queen, etc. was one of the nice girls ever. No one was really mean once we passed through freshman year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Or were they just self-absorbed in their own social networks, and I took their aloofness as being mean?

This, at least as far as my private high school was concerned. They just stuck with the kids they knew. They were never mean or out to get anyone.

[Anonymous]

I was popular in high school, but I only realized that in hindsight. I was class president, moved easily among several social circles, invited to lots of parties. But I was no very self-confident (hated being class president, and couldn't wait for the year to end). I don't recall being deliberately mean to anyone. In fact, I recall trying to befriend a few of the awkward types. How is life today? I am still very popular I guess, although it sounds silly to say that at my age. I have lots of friends, and a very active social life.
OP, why are you asking? I get the sense, that you were not popular, and it still worries you. Or, are you worried about your child?

[georgiegirl]

I never thought I was popular - too much of a GDI to join anything really.

But at the 10-yr. high school reunion, people I barely recognized came up to me to tell me how funny I was.

Go figure.

[Anonymous]

I don't think funny is popular though, is it? I was class clown. Everyone knew me and "liked" me...because I was funny. But I wasn't cute or popular, like the cute guys wanted to date me.

[Anonymous]

How on Earth is funny not popular? Who doesn't love to laugh! Loved the funny people!!

[Anonymous]

The popular kids in my class did not know they were popular. They also were not mean. In fact, the nicer you were, the more people wanted to be around you.

Where did you get the idea that popular and mean were related, OP? Were the popular girls mean to you? Did that make you think they were popular? You need to rethink this. And don't let your kids believe this nonsense that popular and mean are related. They will get pummeled.

[Anonymous]

But then there were kids who were unreachable...they were cute, they were jerks, they never looked at you. When I was 16 and we talked about the popular kids, it WAS the mean kids.

None of them every became anything. They're all begging me to their facebook friend. I won't. They don't spell well and it looks like they drink every weekend. Together. Like 20 years later.

[Anonymous]

Wow, I guess all of the PPs went to high schools that were VERY different from my own. At my HS, the "royalty" in the popular crowd could only be described as vicious - downright nasty, vindictive, unkind people. There was a second circle of nice popular people - well liked by all and also attractive and wealthy (which goes a long way toward being popular - the poor kids aren't often top of the social heap). Interestingly, two kids who would have been considered total nerds during our freshman year ended up being homecoming king and queen our senior year, because they were awesome people and universally liked by everyone...except the competitors for the crown. You would not believe the shock and horrorified looks on the faces of the queen bee and her assumed king when the "dorks" got crowned homecoming king/queen. Priceless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The popular kids in my class did not know they were popular. They also were not mean. In fact, the nicer you were, the more people wanted to be around you.

Where did you get the idea that popular and mean were related, OP? Were the popular girls mean to you? Did that make you think they were popular? You need to rethink this. And don't let your kids believe this nonsense that popular and mean are related. They will get pummeled.

Agreed. Have you been watching too much Glee or something? I didn't think I was popular until the senior year poll came out and I was voted "most likely to brighten up your day". Which probably means that most people didn't think I was mean and nasty. There were mean girls in my class but they weren't considered "popular" just "bitches."