Anyone else hate playdates?

[Anonymous]

I used to do a bunch of playdates but started cutting back on them more recently and noticed life is so much better without them. It's nice not having to plan my day around a 2-3 hour playdate. Will this mess things up for my kids socially?

[Anonymous]

Age? Why do you hate them so much? What do they prevent you from doing? I love them but I have girls and only invite kids I know are “easy.”

[Anonymous]

Play dates above the age six can be very nice and wonderful if the kids are well-behaved..... There are some kids that we will never invite back and instead meet up at parks or encourage playing together at school.

[Anonymous]

Once kids are around 7 kids should be mostly independent at playdates, so I'm not sure what there is to hate. You offer them all a snack, check on them once in a while, and otherwise get stuff done at home. Or drop them at a friends house and go do errands for a few hours.

Younger than 7, or playdates where parents stick around, are definitely annoying, but good for kids (and nice if you like the other parent).

[Anonymous]

It’s nice if they’re in your neighborhood, that way kids can come and go and it’s not as formal, involving the parents to arrange everything.

[Anonymous]

I love playdates. My son is 6 and I just need to check on them periodically and provide snacks. I prepped dinner and read a book yesterday while my son had a friend over. I'm always happy to host a playdate but I have an only child so I want him to have friends and be social.

[Anonymous]

We have four kids, so barely even notice a 5th.

[Anonymous]

I love playdates for my 8 year old. It's hours of time I don't have to entertain him.

[Anonymous]

We never were big on the playdate circuit for a variety of reasons and socially my kid has not suffered (she's MS now). She had aftercare after school, an activity with other kids every weekend and usually a bday party on the weekends when she was younger - it was plenty.

[Anonymous]

My girl is 7. The only bad ones are when the parent stays and I have to entertain the parent who is boring AF. In general, I love playdates. I love observing my child with other people, that's how you know if they are respectful and kind. I also know that if I host a playdate and the other kid has fun, we might get invited to her house which relieves me of child duty for a few hours. It takes a village.

[Anonymous]

It depends on the age. I invite different kids for the 6 year old who's having difficulties making friends. All those playdates are high supervision and sometimes, I hate them. But the older DS's friends self-manage, they even get their own snacks.

[Anonymous]

I hate them too and don’t do them. My kids have plenty of extracurricular activities with friends, siblings to play with, and neighbours. That is plenty

[Anonymous]

I don’t mind play dates. Dd is 6 and so far the handful of friends she’s asked over have all been easy. The girls always end up playing nicely the whole time with minimal work on my part. DD is shy so I find facilitating opportunities for her to play 1:1 with kids she likes outside of school and her structured activities is good for her.

[Anonymous]

I hate playdates where I barely know the other family. I love playdates with kids my kids are already friends with. So easy!

The problem is that in order to get to the point where you know the other family and it's all easy, you usually have to do at least a couple play dates or family meet ups where it's awkward and annoying. And the worst is when your kid becomes friends with a kid who kind of sucks AND their family kind of sucks.

But we have a handful of families with whom playdates are genuinely great and a pleasure to host because I like their kids and it means my kids are happy and entertained. Plus then you get reciprocal play dates where your kid goes to their house and that basically free childcare without having to acclimate your children to a caregiver. Such a win-win.

If all playdates were like that, no one would ever complain.

[Anonymous]

My kid is 11 and an only. I like her having play dates. I wish other people would reciprocate more though. That’s a whole other thread though.