Why make their own doc appts?

[Anonymous]

I've seen this mentioned as a marker of a kid's maturity level. Why? I never did this for myself. I explained to my SAHM that something was an issue and she would help me figure out how to proceed with treatments and whether a doc visit was necessary. It's not something you just know how to do suddenly on your 16th birthday. Is it a sunburn or a rash? Let's try some aloe vera for a day and see. Are these recurring headaches possibly migraines? Let's try blocking the sun and putting you someplace dark and quiet to see if that matters, and let's track your food and sleeping patterns that might be triggering them. How would a kid know what sort of specialist might be needed? How do they know if you've got the money to cover the copay that week or not? How do they know that you can get them an excused absence from school for that day that the doc is available? How do these kids transport themselves to the doctor's office in the middle of the school day without parental involvement?

[Anonymous]

Lazy parenting.

[Anonymous]

Because my kids went off to college far from home and needed to know how to self-evaluate and make decisions about when medical intervention was needed.

[Anonymous]

They went to college at 16? I'm talking about teens in high school. Obviously, nobody is flying to another state to drive their kid to the campus health center.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've seen this mentioned as a marker of a kid's maturity level. Why? I never did this for myself. I explained to my SAHM that something was an issue and she would help me figure out how to proceed with treatments and whether a doc visit was necessary. It's not something you just know how to do suddenly on your 16th birthday. Is it a sunburn or a rash? Let's try some aloe vera for a day and see. Are these recurring headaches possibly migraines? Let's try blocking the sun and putting you someplace dark and quiet to see if that matters, and let's track your food and sleeping patterns that might be triggering them. How would a kid know what sort of specialist might be needed? How do they know if you've got the money to cover the copay that week or not? How do they know that you can get them an excused absence from school for that day that the doc is available? How do these kids transport themselves to the doctor's office in the middle of the school day without parental involvement?

Good lord, you are a very literal thinker. It's not "hey, sick kid, go find a doctor off the internet and make an appointment since you have chronic migraines. kthxbye." It's "hey, you need a sports physical before the soccer season starts. Here's the number for the pediatrician [that you've been seeing since birth]. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays after 3 will work for my schedule to bring you there." You start with the 'easy' calls (i.e. scheduling a routine physical, dental cleaning, etc.) so that they can gradually build the skills needed to do the more complex stuff on their won.

The fact that they don't know how to do things on their 16th birthday is exactly WHY you teach them to do these things. They don't turn 25 and just know how to do these things suddenly either- so why not give them guided practice to equip them with the skills they need, when they still have the soft landing of being under your roof?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They went to college at 16? I'm talking about teens in high school. Obviously, nobody is flying to another state to drive their kid to the campus health center.

One kid went to college at 16 and turned 17 days after arriving. Another went at 16 and turned 17 three months later.

[Anonymous]

Heck, I've always made my DH's doctor's since marrying him over 20 years ago.

I've also seen, in the context of kids going off to college, that knowing how to do your own laundry is a skill needed/mark of maturity. I sent my son to college two years ago not knowing how to do laundry and somehow he figured it out. But he did know how to change a flat tire and jump start a car.

Of course there is no one way or "correct" way of raising our kids and preparing them for adulthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They went to college at 16? I'm talking about teens in high school. Obviously, nobody is flying to another state to drive their kid to the campus health center.

But if you don’t teach them at 16, how do they know how to do it at 18? Also please dont assume parents aren’t flying to California for a college kid’s cold. They absolutely are in egregious cases.

[Anonymous]

Yes, a 16 y.o. should be capable of scheduling their own appointments.

“You’re growing up, and taking care of your health is important. Did you know that anyone age 12 and older can make their own doctor appointments, including phone and video visits, and get confidential care for certain health concerns?”

https://mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org/ncal/article/teens-guide-to-getting-care-at-kaiser-permanente-1896760

[Anonymous]

Not everything needs to be taught. I did all that in high school living away from home.

[Anonymous]

Its not like going away to college means you no longer communicate. "Mom, I have felt crappy for two days. I have a fever (thanks for sending me with a thermometer!)... "Mom I rolled my ankle on a run this morning and it is swelling..

I might suggest the health center or urgent care. I might suggest waiting a day. You can guide them fine from a distance as things come up. I do not think this is something that needs practice in HS given that I am likely the one transporting and paying and dealing with insurance.

[Anonymous]

My working mom did this for me through college if the provider was in my hometown. I went to the college medical center myself. When I graduated and moved to a new city I started going my own. She helped me find the initial providers though. I’m 42 now and she is gone and I assure you I’m fully functioning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've seen this mentioned as a marker of a kid's maturity level. Why? I never did this for myself. I explained to my SAHM that something was an issue and she would help me figure out how to proceed with treatments and whether a doc visit was necessary. It's not something you just know how to do suddenly on your 16th birthday. Is it a sunburn or a rash? Let's try some aloe vera for a day and see. Are these recurring headaches possibly migraines? Let's try blocking the sun and putting you someplace dark and quiet to see if that matters, and let's track your food and sleeping patterns that might be triggering them. How would a kid know what sort of specialist might be needed? How do they know if you've got the money to cover the copay that week or not? How do they know that you can get them an excused absence from school for that day that the doc is available? How do these kids transport themselves to the doctor's office in the middle of the school day without parental involvement?

Good lord, you are a very literal thinker. It's not "hey, sick kid, go find a doctor off the internet and make an appointment since you have chronic migraines. kthxbye." It's "hey, you need a sports physical before the soccer season starts. Here's the number for the pediatrician [that you've been seeing since birth]. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays after 3 will work for my schedule to bring you there." You start with the 'easy' calls (i.e. scheduling a routine physical, dental cleaning, etc.) so that they can gradually build the skills needed to do the more complex stuff on their won.

The fact that they don't know how to do things on their 16th birthday is exactly WHY you teach them to do these things. They don't turn 25 and just know how to do these things suddenly either- so why not give them guided practice to equip them with the skills they need, when they still have the soft landing of being under your roof?

+2
Just about to post something similar.
Plus it teaches them telephone skills and etiquette.

Also, lead by example too. My kids all know where the Neosporin is and can figure out if a cut is severe enough to apply it for example.
They've seen me self-evaluate myself and have followed suite ("ugh, I have a headache, I bet it was bc I didn't drin knight water today. Let me try that").

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because my kids went off to college far from home and needed to know how to self-evaluate and make decisions about when medical intervention was needed.

Lol, so..... making your own appointment will not help with that.

Besides, who's kid has a serious illness and doesn't call you.

Hey mom did i mention I tore my ACL and had surgery last month... wtf is wrong with you people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've seen this mentioned as a marker of a kid's maturity level. Why? I never did this for myself. I explained to my SAHM that something was an issue and she would help me figure out how to proceed with treatments and whether a doc visit was necessary. It's not something you just know how to do suddenly on your 16th birthday. Is it a sunburn or a rash? Let's try some aloe vera for a day and see. Are these recurring headaches possibly migraines? Let's try blocking the sun and putting you someplace dark and quiet to see if that matters, and let's track your food and sleeping patterns that might be triggering them. How would a kid know what sort of specialist might be needed? How do they know if you've got the money to cover the copay that week or not? How do they know that you can get them an excused absence from school for that day that the doc is available? How do these kids transport themselves to the doctor's office in the middle of the school day without parental involvement?

Good lord, you are a very literal thinker. It's not "hey, sick kid, go find a doctor off the internet and make an appointment since you have chronic migraines. kthxbye." It's "hey, you need a sports physical before the soccer season starts. Here's the number for the pediatrician [that you've been seeing since birth]. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays after 3 will work for my schedule to bring you there." You start with the 'easy' calls (i.e. scheduling a routine physical, dental cleaning, etc.) so that they can gradually build the skills needed to do the more complex stuff on their won.

The fact that they don't know how to do things on their 16th birthday is exactly WHY you teach them to do these things. They don't turn 25 and just know how to do these things suddenly either- so why not give them guided practice to equip them with the skills they need, when they still have the soft landing of being under your roof?

You are a very black and white thinker.

It's literally a phone call, it's just as fine to say.. hey Thursday after school go to the doctor for your physical, or your dentist appointment is Monday before school... get a note so your not maked unexcused.

You think they will be 25 years old and not know how to schedule a dr apointment. FFS!