How do you handle public surprise attack?

[Anonymous]

Say during a meeting, out of nowhere you are questioned and implied that you have not met expectation. The issue being questioned was never discussed with you before and you followed the general practice where many people did before. Obviously, it was not an issue for others, yet when you do it, you become the only one being questioned (and in public, as a surprise). What's a good strategy to respond? The issue was raised in a way as if you were not meeting some generally good character (e.g., teamwork, collaboration), though your practice was no different from others. Should you defend yourself and point out that there's never a discussion before and it's not an unusual practice. Or should you ask to talk in private (in which case, it may appear to other attendees that you admit the accuse). I'm sure there's a better way to respond?

[Anonymous]

"Dave, can you give me some examples of how the team has previously used the 505 Manual in Widget Assembly? I'm not trying to discount your suggestion, but I honestly am just wracking my brains and I can't think of any. I've always followed the ABC and Rogers Protocols. Was there a new practice you would like us to use"

[Anonymous]

"That's good input, thank you. I wasn't aware of that feedback previously, so this is helpful. Let's set up a time for us to discuss after I have a chance to review the metrics."

Don't argue.

[Anonymous]

After the meeting, ask your boss "What's your take on what Larlo said?"


Pat attention to see if your boss thinks Larlo was right or wrong (but don't inmeid argue.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After the meeting, ask your boss "What's your take on what Larlo said?"


Pat attention to see if your boss thinks Larlo was right or wrong (but don't inmeid argue.)

What if the one questioning is the boss? What does that mean? What's the intention?

[Anonymous]

You sound hostile and like you’re making excuses.

Even if you’re entirely correct, that’s not how it’s going to be interpreted by anyone other than you.

And FWIW, every employee I’ve ever had who said stuff like what’s in your OP was a toxic PITA… clearly we have no way of knowing whether that’s true in your case, but maybe try to really consider it from your boss’s perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound hostile and like you’re making excuses.

Even if you’re entirely correct, that’s not how it’s going to be interpreted by anyone other than you.

And FWIW, every employee I’ve ever had who said stuff like what’s in your OP was a toxic PITA… clearly we have no way of knowing whether that’s true in your case, but maybe try to really consider it from your boss’s perspective.

Are you saying OP is hostile? Sounds more like the person calling out somebody's job performance in public is rather hostile and unprofessional. This behavior is so unbecoming of a manager and not productive.

[Anonymous]

Is the person your boss or someone you supervise? Is the person known to do / say incorrect things about others or known to be an important culture member of the team?

Boss -- say thank you for the feedback and can we talk in private.
supervise - say thank you for raising this issue and move on

Known to say wild things -- ignore
Known to be trustworthy -- ask to talk privately later

[Anonymous]

Toss the table over and say “you want some of this?” They usually look scared and back down.

[Anonymous]

"this is a surprise to me!"

[Anonymous]

I would say I've followed the guidelines used by everyone else, and that if Boss wanted something different, he or she should have mentioned it before it became an issue, as it now clearly seems to be, since we're talking about it in a public meeting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
"That's good input, thank you. I wasn't aware of that feedback previously, so this is helpful. Let's set up a time for us to discuss after I have a chance to review the metrics."

Don't argue.

This is absolutely perfect.

[Anonymous]

I always appreciate feedback especially the opportunity to catch errors. Let ke go over the numbers myself and we can discuss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After the meeting, ask your boss "What's your take on what Larlo said?"


Pat attention to see if your boss thinks Larlo was right or wrong (but don't inmeid argue.)

What if the one questioning is the boss? What does that mean? What's the intention?

Then it means your boss thinks you are doing your job wrong, or is pretending to. So ask for guidance, and if your boss's guidance is just totally wrong, escalate further. Tell your boss you want to meet with their boss to sort this out, because you want to do a good job, but there's a misunderstanding you can't solve yourselves.

If your boss is just angling and BSing to force you out, not much you can do except collect evidence in case you need to sue later.

Getting boss's boss involved sooner will at least give you some voice before your boss lies about you.

[Anonymous]

I wasn't aware of that feedback previously. Let's set up a time for us to discuss

Don't say, "thank you". And don't say, "helpful"