When should my kids stop being so silly and actually listen and practice at sports?

[Anonymous]

My boys are 6 and 7, and NOT athletic at all. But I keep them in sports to build strength and they certainly need activity.

But they’re VERY wild and silly at practices…they don’t really try, and they’re not nearly as good and strong as the others.

Do we keep pushing through?

[Anonymous]

Do they enjoy it? Do they want to keep doing it?

[Anonymous]

Are they in the same sport together or with a best friend? Sometimes, separating the kid from the fellow silly kid can help them focus. Or ask the coach to separate them so they aren't say playing catch with each other. I've seen plenty of focused 6-7 year olds in various sports, not all are good but they can pay attention and try.

[Anonymous]

You’re focusing on two things: (lack of) respect for their coaches and teammates, and (lack of) athletic ability. The first is a problem, the second isn’t.

Address the silliness by reminding them about expectations before practice. Stay at practice and help out as needed. Give your coach permission to bench them for a few minutes if they can’t get it together. Have them apologize if their behavior was especially egregious. On the way home, talk about how their choices impacted the experience of their teammates. Rinse and repeat — and take a break from the activity if the behavioral expectations seem beyond them right now.

Not being as good as the others? That’s not an issue you need to worry about right now.

[Anonymous]

9

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re focusing on two things: (lack of) respect for their coaches and teammates, and (lack of) athletic ability. The first is a problem, the second isn’t.

Address the silliness by reminding them about expectations before practice. Stay at practice and help out as needed. Give your coach permission to bench them for a few minutes if they can’t get it together. Have them apologize if their behavior was especially egregious. On the way home, talk about how their choices impacted the experience of their teammates. Rinse and repeat — and take a break from the activity if the behavioral expectations seem beyond them right now.

Not being as good as the others? That’s not an issue you need to worry about right now.

Agree, and actually it's okay to never worry about them being as good as others. I played sports and was not as good as my peers. Stopped playing in HS when it became clear I'd never make varsity of anything. I still developed a lifelong love of sports and exercise, I pursued other things I was much better at, and I learned it's okay to be bad at things.

As an adult, I am still comfortable being bad at things and I actually think it's a great skill. I'm good at things too. It is not kind to expect your kids to excel at every single thing they do.

[Anonymous]

8 or 9

[Anonymous]

You really should work on having them listen to the coach. My dh has volunteer coached soccer for years and it's incredibly frustrating to try and coach a group of kids who are just goofing around and not listening. Very disrespectful. Your kid knows how to behave at school (I assume). I would work on this with them.

As for their ability--who cares? Are they having fun?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re focusing on two things: (lack of) respect for their coaches and teammates, and (lack of) athletic ability. The first is a problem, the second isn’t.

Address the silliness by reminding them about expectations before practice. Stay at practice and help out as needed. Give your coach permission to bench them for a few minutes if they can’t get it together. Have them apologize if their behavior was especially egregious. On the way home, talk about how their choices impacted the experience of their teammates. Rinse and repeat — and take a break from the activity if the behavioral expectations seem beyond them right now.

Not being as good as the others? That’s not an issue you need to worry about right now.

+1. And they might actually get better at the sport if they focused and didn't goof around. Half the battle at their age is following instructions/understanding the point of the game. I'm serious.

[Anonymous]

Thanks all. I’ll talk to the coach, and of course to them.

[Anonymous]

Now. It is distracting and sucks for the other kids (and the coach) when your kid are disruptive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You really should work on having them listen to the coach. My dh has volunteer coached soccer for years and it's incredibly frustrating to try and coach a group of kids who are just goofing around and not listening. Very disrespectful. Your kid knows how to behave at school (I assume). I would work on this with them.

As for their ability--who cares? Are they having fun?

All of this.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like ADHD. Executive functioning skills improve over years—even into their twenties. Buckle up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Now. It is distracting and sucks for the other kids (and the coach) when your kid are disruptive.

This.

It’s a skill to learn, so approach it in that way.

[Anonymous]

Because they are little kids and they want to fool around in their free time but you are for I guess them into an organized, structured activity. Put them in the back yard with a large cardboard box, or some wood and small nails they can pound and build. They’ve just spent all day following the rules at school.