Men holding their babies in Zoom meetings

[Anonymous]

I work in a very pro work life balance, pro family, casual work environment. And it’s great to be a parent and feel supported in that by your employer and to have that flexibility (I have young kids too). But I’ve noticed the only people who ever hold their babies in Zoom meetings are the men. I’m a woman and I feel like the women don’t have the luxury to advertise their child rearing responsibilities even at a progressive company like mine. Sometimes I even find it irritating that these guys likely don’t even realize the privilege they have and how women for decades have had to hide their home life at work, and still do, yet men are seen as great dads and employees by flaunting it.

It’s also just distracting to me, man or woman. If it happens once in a blue moon because childcare fell through, fine. But one male coworker has his baby in a team meeting every week. Apparently there’s a nanny at home so not sure why the baby is too.

[Anonymous]

Good god you people will find anything to complain about men. Dude was holding a baby not throwing it against a wall.

[Anonymous]

It’s a power move: “I’m here taking care of my kid and you’re not going to say anything about it.”

[Anonymous]

I agree with you OP. My DH holds our young toddler on his (informal) calls all the time and doesn’t understand why I don’t. I also find it annoying when coworkers have their kids on calls.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should take off your sweatpants and go back to the office.

[Anonymous]

It’s passive aggressive payback for male feminization under duress

[Anonymous]

Same here. It doesn’t make me feel negatively about the men as individuals but it’s annoying how I could not do that without people perceiving me in a certain way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good god you people will find anything to complain about men. Dude was holding a baby not throwing it against a wall.

+1. Whiners like whining.

[Anonymous]

This is also true for me. Babies don’t bother me (unless they are crying and distracting everyone) but I’ve never had a female colleague bring her child in frame on a video call.

[Anonymous]

I have not seen a man holding a baby on a Zoom call since the early Covid days when everyone was holding their baby on a Zoom call.

[Anonymous]

I hear what you're saying, but we need men to do things like this. If nothing else, but to normalize it and pave the way.

DH took 12 weeks of paternity in order to show his employees what he wanted and to make sure that they knew it was acceptable.

[Anonymous]

Why do you all have young children at home during the work day?! Daycares are open!

[Anonymous]

They don’t carry the heavy baggage of trying to show that children responsibilities stand in the way of them performing their job. It’s not them. It’s us who have been trying to break in into corporate worlds, break the glass ceiling, lean in, and prove that we can be as good as men. They don’t have this mental history. They can just hold their baby without the back thought that it’ll affect their job review and promotion opportunity. The more men hold babies the less it’ll be seen as just women’s issue.

[Anonymous]

Women in my group definitely have showed their kids during zoom calls. On multiple occasions.

[Anonymous]

Toatally agree OP. Outside of extenuating circumstances (sick kid, sick nanny, etc.), these people need to have childcare (in home or otherwise) so that they can do their jobs. Kids in the frame are a distraction and as a woman I'd never do this. Before he went back to the office, my DH used to always call the kids in to say hi on video calls if they were home from school - drove me crazy.