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Brother and sister-in-law are hosting a 1-year bash, which is silly, but they like to host and will use any excuse for a get-together, so that's fine. Problem is, the wedding was so weird that I don't know if I want to go.
My future SIL asked me to be a bridesmaid, then rescinded it a week later. I honestly wasn't bothered one way or the other - just a bit confused when she asked me to rejoin a month after that. I declined, my brother got involved, and I ended up doing it, but it was awkward and I've never felt close to her because it was just weird. Come to find out, her best friend had asked I not be a bridesmaid because I was too fat to wear the dress she'd always dreamed of wearing at SIL's wedding, and SIL had said sure, she would disinvite me. My brother found out and flipped out and insisted I be included. They went with traditional evening gowns to cover my whale body instead of the dreamed-of minidress because of me, and both have been holding a grudge since. And yes, these are educated women in their 30's. The best friend will obviously be at the anniversary party, and I just...don't want to go. Not because I'm angry or embarrassed, but because it no longer sounds like fun, and life is too short. Would you? |
| Be the bigger person. Go. It’s also your brother’s celebration. |
| Go and have fun with the other guests. Ignore the mean woman. |
| Awful. Honestly sounds like a bride could be one of the women writing, "what do I do" on this board. Sorry you were treated so poorly OP. |
| Sounds like you’re the one holding the grudge. She’s going to be around a while, it’s time to learn to like her for your brothers sake. |
| I’m sorry OP, that’s really messed up. I think it would be fine to skip (especially because a one year anniversary party doesn’t strike me as a can’t miss occasion), but also fine to go if you’re up for it and can easily avoid the mean person. |
| I’d go because I’d want my brother to feel supported. He’s going to need it when he gets divorced. |
Nope, she brought up how she'd wanted different dresses just last week! |
I know. And I do love him. But you know. |
| How big is the party? If it's small enough that you'll have to have extensive conversation with the friend, I'd skip it. But if it's larger and you can ignore her awfulness I'd go. |
Small. Probably 20 people. |
| Go and wear your bridesmaid dress |
+1 When it happens, I'd be sure to note that he ignored a huge red flag when he learned the reason she dis-invited you. |
| I'd get sick the night before the party. |
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OMG, i would be so disappointed in my brother if he married someone like this. Sorry OP. I'm glad he stuck up for you, but WTH? How anyone in your family would expect you to go to this I don't understand.
You don't have to make a stink about it, just have other plans. You don't need to suck it up to get along for your brother. His wife is awful. I hope this is a troll post because I can't imagine it ever happening in real life. Perhaps disappointment over a dress choice, but un-asking your future SIL? She's a see you next tuesday. |