Lost my best friend. Got drunk. Said something stupid to my girlfriend.

Anonymous
I lost my best friend last week and I’ve been understandably devastated since. Throughout all of this my girlfriend has been amazing; comforting me, made and dropped off food to my best friend’s parent’s, when to the funeral with me (there were only 8 of us per his parent’s request). She was even still supposed to back home (lives in another state) but stayed behind an extra 1.5 weeks so that she could be with me. Like I said, amazing. This afternoon was his funeral and it was open casket, so the funeral was even more emotional. We all went back to his parent’s house and started telling stories and drinking. I got pretty buzzed so my girlfriend had to drive us home. When we got home I asked her if we could walk to this bar down the street for one more drink. She told me that I had enough and should have some water. I told her I would just get one drink and come back. I did only have one drink but it tipped me over the edge and got drunk. Side story: my best friend and I also shared another really good friend who attended the funeral. He just started dating this new girl about a month ago.

So, I get back home and my girlfriend brings up how ny best friend’s mom told her and new girlfriend how much me and my friend love these two women. I drunkenly said, “you know what the difference is? *Insert new girl’s name* appreciates his love but you don’t appreciate my love”. She said, “go to bed you’re drunk”. I turned her and said, “well do you? Do you?…do you appreciate my love?”. This REALLY pissed her off. She got so mad and said how dare I compare to her another woman, let alone a stranger, to passively aggressively bring up an issue when she’s been so be trying really hard to comfort me the best that she could. Not sure what that has to with anything? Currently, she’s in the living room on the couch watching tv. She won’t come to bed. Like I said, she’s really pissed off and has been for hours now. I was drunk and truly didn’t mean it and I’ve apologized. This seems like an overreaction, no?

Anonymous
Go to bed.
Anonymous
Go to AA.
Anonymous
This isn't about best friend or being drunk - you meant what you said but were unguarded enough to say it b/c of those factors.
Anonymous
Why on earth would you say that, after she stayed extra time with you and drove you home and gave you good advice to stop drinking and tolerated your drunkenness? Why did you say that?

It sounds like you have a drinking problem and you picked a fight with her for no reason. She will probably break up with you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Why on earth would you say that, after she stayed extra time with you and drove you home and gave you good advice to stop drinking and tolerated your drunkenness? Why did you say that?

It sounds like you have a drinking problem and you picked a fight with her for no reason. She will probably break up with you.


This. And she should.

The only correct response was, “I do love you and thank you so much.”

You don’t deserve her.
Anonymous
Why did you say that? Yes you were drunk, but why did you say that particular thing?
Anonymous
She should break up with you.
Anonymous
You need to drop the defensiveness. What you said was out of line, even if you were drunk. The only thing to do is apologize.
She is not overreacting. I can’t believe you are posting to complain about her rather than to try to repair things. Geez. I’m sorry you lost your friend but your behavior is very immature.
Anonymous
Who gets drunk like this in reaction to a friend dying? That isn’t normal. Do you have a drinking problem?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This isn't about best friend or being drunk - you meant what you said but were unguarded enough to say it b/c of those factors.


Not true at all - sometimes people say things that are ridiculous not because they feel them deeply and have been hiding it, but simply because they are unguarded and trying to push buttons or get responses. Do you think drunk people REALLY want to fight everyone and REALLY love everyone? It's foolish to intermingle the two and only people who know the person can truly discern.

Sounds like GF knows he's full of 1t and just having a bit of a pity party and she was having none of it. They'll be ok in the AM.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Who gets drunk like this in reaction to a friend dying? That isn’t normal. Do you have a drinking problem?


Wow... a HOLE of the day here. I would never wish someone close to you to die, but it sounds like you haven't experienced it. And everyone experiences grief differently. You are terrible.
Anonymous
She loves you. Apologize.
Anonymous
Au contraire, this is actually an underreaction! Lucky for you, your girlfriend has a savior/Florence Nightengale complex for taking care of manboys.

She’s mad now, but will at some point soon forgive you because she’s just that loving. It will take her months if not years to fully snap out of her stupidity. You better enjoy the ride while it lasts!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Who gets drunk like this in reaction to a friend dying? That isn’t normal. Do you have a drinking problem?


Wow... a HOLE of the day here. I would never wish someone close to you to die, but it sounds like you haven't experienced it. And everyone experiences grief differently. You are terrible.


NP

Yes, getting drunk was OP's reaction. Then he proceeds to mess up a main relationship in his life. The drinking has done him no favors.

Stop drinking OP before you mess up the rest of your life.
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