Inappropriate conversations at school - how to handle

[Anonymous]

Over the past month or so my daughter (2nd grade) has been coming home and telling me stories about things the boys say in class. The most recent story is the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Apparently, it is a regular occurrence that they make sexual moaning noises in class. DD doesn’t know why it’s inappropriate, but she feels like it is and that she should tell me when they do it.

I’ve had her tell me multiple times about boys calling the girls “strippers.”

Today, she informed me that they were talking about how “Lucy chokes on too many…” and then used a slang word I didn’t recognize. When I asked what she thought that meant she pointed to her private parts.

There is one name in particular that keeps coming up when she tells me these stories, but she is hesitant to name names because she doesn’t want her classmates to view her as a taddle tail.

This seems like more of a principal or social work issue, but are those the right people to contact? Or should I start with the teacher? I don't want to have to keep having these conversations with my 8 year old.

[Anonymous]

I would call the counselor.

[Anonymous]

What kind of school is this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of school is this?

Public elementary school.

[Anonymous]

OP how does your 8 year old know what sexual noises sound like? I am not a prude and my kids got that talk early, etc... But you said she's 8 so that is odd. What you wrote sounds more like she had no idea what the noises were and you put words in her mouth.

Also, she needs to name names. My guess is this is one kid and. the others are just followers.

And please do not go to the principal. What would they know they are not in the classroom?

Ask the teacher, just drop them an email and ask point blank all the items you listed here. I am sure they will respond appropriately.

It is important you get to the bottom of this. If things are not great with a few boys then yes it needs to be addressed, and on the other side why does your child feel they need to report back to you other kids' behaviors? And why is this all about sex at 8 years old?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP how does your 8 year old know what sexual noises sound like? I am not a prude and my kids got that talk early, etc... But you said she's 8 so that is odd. What you wrote sounds more like she had no idea what the noises were and you put words in her mouth.

Also, she needs to name names. My guess is this is one kid and. the others are just followers.

And please do not go to the principal. What would they know they are not in the classroom?

Ask the teacher, just drop them an email and ask point blank all the items you listed here. I am sure they will respond appropriately.

It is important you get to the bottom of this. If things are not great with a few boys then yes it needs to be addressed, and on the other side why does your child feel they need to report back to you other kids' behaviors? And why is this all about sex at 8 years old?

I've found that kids with older sibs know more than they should, so not out of the ordinary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP how does your 8 year old know what sexual noises sound like? I am not a prude and my kids got that talk early, etc... But you said she's 8 so that is odd. What you wrote sounds more like she had no idea what the noises were and you put words in her mouth.

Also, she needs to name names. My guess is this is one kid and. the others are just followers.

And please do not go to the principal. What would they know they are not in the classroom?

Ask the teacher, just drop them an email and ask point blank all the items you listed here. I am sure they will respond appropriately.

It is important you get to the bottom of this. If things are not great with a few boys then yes it needs to be addressed, and on the other side why does your child feel they need to report back to you other kids' behaviors? And why is this all about sex at 8 years old?

My 8yo is a reporter. She likes to tell me who did what, not in a tattle tale way, but just here's what happened today, both good and bad. NP.

[Anonymous]

I would share what you know with the teacher. Similar things happened/were said at my kid's school. The teachers did work with the counseling staff to try to get a handle on it.

[Anonymous]

Start with the teacher, OP. You can also tell your daughter to immediately tell the teacher when these things occur in class.

[Anonymous]

My kids do the moaning thing too. They have no idea what it “means”-they just think it’s funny. I think it comes from Tik-Tok which they don’t have access to, but makes its way to my kids via kids at school. Mine are 8 and 10. I try not to react but it sure grates on my nerves!

[Anonymous]

Def talk to counselor / principal. Could be that the ringleader has older siblings OR there is some kind of abuse going on. Regardless, it is absolutely not acceptable for boys of any age to be calling girls of any age strippers. Disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of school is this?

Public elementary school.

Also happening in Catholic elementary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids do the moaning thing too. They have no idea what it “means”-they just think it’s funny. I think it comes from Tik-Tok which they don’t have access to, but makes its way to my kids via kids at school. Mine are 8 and 10. I try not to react but it sure grates on my nerves!

You try not to react??

[Anonymous]

I’d contact the principal, counselor and if I had the name of a “ring leader” then probably also CPS.

[Anonymous]

I’m sure the teacher has heard it and if there’s something she could do about it then she probably would have done that. I doubt she loves hearing little girls referred to as sex workers any more than you do.