Communication with preschool aftercare staff, what is normal?

[Anonymous]

DC goes to a preschool with after care. I recently found out at a meeting with the preschool teacher that DC has been eating their morning snack, lunch, and afternoon snack at morning snack time. DC keeps eating until they are done and this is well past snack time and other children are playing. I requested to speak to the after care staff to find out how DC is doing in after care and whether DC has any food left for lunch or afternoon snack. I was never given the opportunity to meet the after care staff and has never had any contact with this person. I was told by the director that there is no email or phone contact with the after care staff. Any question goes through the director who will then provide the response. Is this normal/acceptable practice?

[Anonymous]

I don't know about DC but I believe it is against licensing rules in many places to deny parents access to a child care facility. Whether your preschool is subject to these rules I do not know. But they should allow you inside your child's classroom on request.

[Anonymous]

Not statistically normal. Wouldn’t you see the aftercare staff at pickup?

Whether it’s acceptable is a personal call up to you. I have had to accept it sometimes, but I don’t like when I haven’t met staff who directly care for my kid.

[Anonymous]

We ran into this last year with aftercare and I think a lot of places go used to having less parent interaction during Covid and are just kind of continuing with that because it's easier for them. In my child's case, she was have frequent accidents at aftercare after being potty trained for a year and never having any issues in preschool. We wound up pulling her from aftercare and this year we got a mother's helper at home instead. I got sick of trying to talk to them about what was going on and hitting a brick wall, and I really hated picking my kid up and she was upset or crying about having an accident (also not normal as on the rare occasion when she does have an accident, she is matter of fact about it and helps clean up and there's no shaming or weirdness about it in our house).

I view an inability to get in touch with them as a major red flag -- the director of the program should be responsive to parents on a same-day basis, IMO. If parents are asking dumb questions or being overzealous, well, that's part of the director's job to handle that. It goes with the territory. But you have a valid issue and they should respond.

I'd consider looking for other care options, personally.

[Anonymous]

I do not know, but the eating thing seems like an issue for the regular teacher and director. Or you need to pack a lot more food if the kid is so hungry.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks everyone for the response!

In further followup with the preschool teacher, I found out that DC has been doing this since preschool started. It is upsetting that it was never brought to my attention as an issue until this recent scheduled meeting. DC is not hungry. DC eats a full breakfast in the morning, and while home, rarely requires a snack before lunch. The teacher initially expressed their concern as DC eats too slow and does not have any time to play. I am torn whether to keep my child there. I personally find it weird that a teacher will allow a child to keep eating while others are doing scheduled activities and did not think it is important to call attention to it sooner. Not sure if I am expecting too much from the preschool teacher here. On top of that I cannot directly communicate with after care staff. DC gets picked up in a car line and after care staff is not there. On the other hand, DC seems happy to go to preschool, the preschool teacher has been responsive after this, and I am locked in a contract for a whole year. Should I wait and see if anything else comes up first before pulling DC out?

[Anonymous]

huh? My preschool is so accessible and you can easily talk to all teachers. It's public school that's like a stone wall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for the response!

In further followup with the preschool teacher, I found out that DC has been doing this since preschool started. It is upsetting that it was never brought to my attention as an issue until this recent scheduled meeting. DC is not hungry. DC eats a full breakfast in the morning, and while home, rarely requires a snack before lunch. The teacher initially expressed their concern as DC eats too slow and does not have any time to play. I am torn whether to keep my child there. I personally find it weird that a teacher will allow a child to keep eating while others are doing scheduled activities and did not think it is important to call attention to it sooner. Not sure if I am expecting too much from the preschool teacher here. On top of that I cannot directly communicate with after care staff. DC gets picked up in a car line and after care staff is not there. On the other hand, DC seems happy to go to preschool, the preschool teacher has been responsive after this, and I am locked in a contract for a whole year. Should I wait and see if anything else comes up first before pulling DC out?

Glad you got your answer. Not sure why you think it’s weird they let a kid finish eating - sounds like they are appropriately letting the kid listen to her body about when to stop eating and not forcing her to be done on their timeline just because it’s easier to have everyone move on at the same time. If she isn’t complaining of hunger at aftercare or when you pick her up, I think all of this is fine.

[Anonymous]

This whole scenario seems bizarre to me. I pick up directly from after care staff. Staff are all in the school directory with emails if I need to contact. School and after care provide the snacks and I provide lunch so there is clear delineation between snack and lunch. I also find it strange that they would let a child eat way past the end of snack on a consistent basis.