How do Christians handle suicide of family member

[Anonymous]

I am not a Christian but I have a good friend who is. Her teenage grandson recently committed suicide. Everyone in her family are devout Christians including the parents of the boy and his siblings. I have not had an opportunity to discuss this with any of them and probably won't, I think it's way too painful and raw right now at least, maybe later on.

As a non-religious at all person I am curious how Christians handle and explain such a senseless tragedy. Are your Christian beliefs and faith in God helpful and comforting at such a time? I am very worried about my friend (as well as the rest of this boy's family members) because it's just hard to imagine how she will be able to make it through this. She has experienced other deaths in the past year and has struggled dealing with that, but it seems this thing might just be too much.

I sincerely hope her faith will help her but it's hard for me to imagine how it will.

[Anonymous]

Hopefully better now than 30 years ago.

When I grew up Catholic, I was taught that suicide was a sin. When I lost a friend to suicide, I believed it, and it was so painful.

I think today, we know so much more about mental health. We know the person didn't mean to hurt those of us on earth ... they just saw no end to their pain.

I hope your friend would seek out some good counseling, Christian or not.

[Anonymous]

Of course it’s comforting if she devoutly believes she will be reunited with him in heaven! What could be more comforting? I envy that.

[Anonymous]

As a progressive Christian, I believe mental illness is real and the suffering just got too much for the person who committed suicide. It's a disease like any other.

Catholics believe differently, so not all Christians are the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course it’s comforting if she devoutly believes she will be reunited with him in heaven! What could be more comforting? I envy that.

I think the point is that Christianity traditionally viewed suicide as a very serious sin, and it's impossible to repent if you're dead, such that people who committed suicide might not go to heaven.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a progressive Christian, I believe mental illness is real and the suffering just got too much for the person who committed suicide. It's a disease like any other.

Catholics believe differently, so not all Christians are the same.

this. I would like to think most Christians feel this way. Jesus would have compassion and so should we.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course it’s comforting if she devoutly believes she will be reunited with him in heaven! What could be more comforting? I envy that.

I think the point is that Christianity traditionally viewed suicide as a very serious sin, and it's impossible to repent if you're dead, such that people who committed suicide might not go to heaven.

That is an unusual perspective in modern American Christians though of course some do believe that. But mainstream Christians in this country (to include most Catholics) believe if someone dies by suicide they were in fact not in their right mind and thus not morally responsible.

[Anonymous]

Yikes
What does religion have to do with it
You will grieve the same way you do any death

Nobody believes the catholic doctrine, but a catholic priest can refuse to do the funeral if he knows the person died from suicide

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hopefully better now than 30 years ago.

When I grew up Catholic, I was taught that suicide was a sin. When I lost a friend to suicide, I believed it, and it was so painful.

I think today, we know so much more about mental health. We know the person didn't mean to hurt those of us on earth ... they just saw no end to their pain.

I hope your friend would seek out some good counseling, Christian or not.

It is better. At least in Catholicism. I also remember being taught that in Catholic middle school in the 1980s, but several of my high school classmates lost family members to suicide in the mid to late 80s and I don’t recall that being brought up at all. My children were never taught it in Catholic school or Religious Ed (CCD).

[Anonymous]

If I were you, I’d never discuss the death of her child unless she brought it up. The death of a child, no matter the cause, is something a parent will never get over. Discussing at any point whether she thinks her son “went to hell” is not a topic that should be brought up in conversation to this mother, or any parent. What a Christian believes about suicide is personal and varies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Of course it’s comforting if she devoutly believes she will be reunited with him in heaven! What could be more comforting? I envy that.

I think the point is that Christianity traditionally viewed suicide as a very serious sin, and it's impossible to repent if you're dead, such that people who committed suicide might not go to heaven.

+1 there’s such a wild range of beliefs in Christianity, but this was the dominant belief. That if you died at your own hand, you wouldn’t go to heaven and churches sometimes wouldn’t even bury them in consecrated ground.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes
What does religion have to do with it
You will grieve the same way you do any death

Nobody believes the catholic doctrine, but a catholic priest can refuse to do the funeral if he knows the person died from suicide

They can also refuse to bury the person in a church cemetery.

[Anonymous]

There is a vary wide range of Christian beliefs. I think that many would find some comfort in the belief that their beloved family member is now “in a better place” with God, and beyond all suffering. This, of course, will not change the pain of their grief, but it may offer them comfort to believe that the ones they love are now beyond the pains of this lifetime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yikes
What does religion have to do with it
You will grieve the same way you do any death

Nobody believes the catholic doctrine, but a catholic priest can refuse to do the funeral if he knows the person died from suicide

They can also refuse to bury the person in a church cemetery.

When is the last time this happened, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes
What does religion have to do with it
You will grieve the same way you do any death

Nobody believes the catholic doctrine, but a catholic priest can refuse to do the funeral if he knows the person died from suicide

Oh yes they do.

I literally just heard two women from Good Counsel & Georgetown Prep discussing this exact thing. And honestly, their discussion made me sick to my stomach.