Who takes kids to the doc? Mom or dad?

[Anonymous]

I know something like this has been posted before but do you split taking your kids to the doc if things come up or do you mostly take them (mom) ?

Up until recently I have 100% been taking the kids to the doctor. It’s not that DH can not but it’s just always naturally fell on to my shoulders. Now I’m starting to question this!!

So do you take them or your DH? Is it split?

[Anonymous]

Who ever can

[Anonymous]

It depends what the issue is.

For my kid with major lifethreatening medical issues, we felt pretty strongly that one parent needed to be really fluent in the medical language and understand the big picture. I quit my job, in part because he needed things like biweekly hospital visits, but also because it allowed me to be that consistent person. So, I went to every appointment, and Dad joined us for the big ones, or the ones when he was off work. Dad worked shifts, so he did have some weekdays off.

For my relatively healthy kids, who are getting more routine care? Then it was usually me, because I was SAH, but if Dad was off he might take them, or if the kids conflicted, he might take a healthy kid while I had their brothers. One of my kids also went through a stage where he was terrified of needles, and his Dad would take him for shot appointments because he did a better job of staying calm with Dad.

[Anonymous]

We both do it, it's just whoever can fit it into their schedule.

[Anonymous]

Whoever is available - which is usually me, but today my DH took the kids to the dentist because I had a big client meeting.

[Anonymous]

Whoever can. Admittedly it at least 60% me (mom) but there’s no assumption that I’m the one to automatically do it.

I stupidly feel some societal pressure that is should be me, so often volunteer, but DH is more than willing and able.

[Anonymous]

I have only girls and I SAH, so 95% me. Maybe DH occasionally when they were very small and I needed to stay home with the other kids.

[Anonymous]

We both have equally important jobs (not BS jobs, but also not big law type jobs) and we both take our kids for their well checkups. We have 3 kids. We just really enjoy their yearly checkups and really liked their checkups as infants. We go together. There was pushback during covid to having more than one adult though.

When they are injured, we pretty much equally take turns. Depends on who is there when they break their legs or bust their chins open.

[Anonymous]

DH 75% of the time since he typically has more workday flexibility. He is better with needles, but I ask better questions.

[Anonymous]

I’d say 95+% me (mom), even when I worked. Now I SAH, no reason for him to take them unless I’m away and it’s an emergency.

For sure, he’s never done a well visit. He’s done a broken bone ER visit while I stayed with younger kid, but then that resulted in a surgery and many follow ups that I did 😉

[Anonymous]

Usually my husband - he has more PTO than I do.

[Anonymous]

2 kids, I SAH. I usually take them because I am home.

DH does not want to miss any time with the kids if he can help it so very often he takes them to the doc as he has a lot of flexibility at work and can take his meetings remotely every now and then. It is interesting how he is not apologetic at work for taking off and he does not explain why he is off. I remember being so apologetic as a mom when I took off from work for anything when I was working! Anyways, my DH loves to be with the kids and so on the weekends he is with the kids on some fieldtrip or the other. He also drops them to school because he cannot pick them from school because of his work hours.

[Anonymous]

80% of the time is me (mom). I prefer to take them as I like details that DH can’t remember and I ask follow up questions that DH wouldn’t think to ask.

[Anonymous]

I (DH) do mostly. My schedule is more flexible than my DW's.

[Anonymous]

It used to be mostly me (DW) but now my husband’s job has unlimited sick leave and our younger DD has weekly speech therapy and occupational therapy so he often does those - it would eat up all my sick time if I went regularly, but I cover when he has meetings.