Buying School Lunches

[Anonymous]

(My oldest is in K, so forgive the ignorance)

We pack a lunch for DD every day. We've never put money on her card because we don't want her buying the school lunch (it's pretty unhealthy IMO). She attends a title one school and nearly everyone gets a free lunch in her class. She's pretty upset she can't go get the lunch too. Yesterday she pretended that she didn't have a lunch and they let her get 4 cheese sticks instead.

We talked to her about this and told her that she had a nice lunch packed (in fact there was a cheesestick in there!). Do we owe the school? Should I say something to the teacher who sent home a note? Everyone thinks we didn't send her with a lunch, when that wasn't the case. I'm also kind of shocked they let a kid only eat 4 cheese sticks for lunch. Is there a way to have backup money on the card, but block it normally?

[Anonymous]

Poor kid, just let her buy lunch with her friends. Who cares if it's not as healthy as your packed lunch - not like she's eating that anyways.

And FWIW, if you try to explain to the teacher that she's only allowed to eat her lunch and not to believe her if she says she doesn't have one packed, they'll (justifiably) think you're being difficult and controlling. It's school, they won't make her eat her lunch and will just be put in an uncomfortable position if they have to fight that battle for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Poor kid, just let her buy lunch with her friends. Who cares if it's not as healthy as your packed lunch - not like she's eating that anyways.

And FWIW, if you try to explain to the teacher that she's only allowed to eat her lunch and not to believe her if she says she doesn't have one packed, they'll (justifiably) think you're being difficult and controlling. It's school, they won't make her eat her lunch and will just be put in an uncomfortable position if they have to fight that battle for you.

+1
I'd let her get school lunch, at least a few times a week. No, it's not the healthiest food in the world, but it's one meal, and she wants to be social and eat the meal with her friends. (Also, one surprise bonus of school lunches was that my kid would eat new foods and foods she wouldn't try at home, because everyone else was eating them.)

[Anonymous]

Wow. Let her get the school lunch.

[Anonymous]

you're being a neurotic nut job, mama. school lunch is fine. let her get it. don't make her feel socially isolated because of this.

[Anonymous]

If I had a kid who actually wanted school lunch, I would be thrilled. Enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

My kid ate 1 year of free lunch from school because school lunch was free last year for everyone. He is a picky eater, and I think he ate the food that he wanted & threw away the veggie. It was me forcing him to get school lunch.

This school year, there is no free lunch but I tell him that i can pay to get him school lunch. He says no thank you.

[Anonymous]

School lunch is disgusting and I agree with packing lunch. I'd tell her if she eats her packed lunch each day she can buy lunch on Fridays. But if I find out she's lying so she can get school lunch I will come to school and accompany her to the cafeteria to watch her eat.

[Anonymous]

Just let her get school lunch!! I haaaaaate school lunch and my older son loves it and I meanly told him it was bad for him and it made him a little afraid if itZ I was able to undo that damage and he moves pretty seamlessly between home lunches and bought lunches. His diet otherwise is absolutely healthy so I feel so silly denying him that freedom. Live and learn, know better, do better.

[Anonymous]

OP here. We debated letting her buy school lunch, but maybe she's too young if she orders 4 cheese sticks. I had thought that school lunch was a set menu and they gave the kids everything on it, but maybe not.

She's definitely not socially isolated, the other kids sit next to her still. It's not free to us.

[Anonymous]

Please don’t teach your kid school lunch is unhealthy. It’s the only food many kids at Title 1 schools gets during the day. Also, I don’t know a single cafeteria that would allow a K kid to have 4 cheese sticks. Put a little money in her card and let her choose! By making it forbidden you are increasing the allure. Let her buy for 2 weeks and then she’ll probably enjoy a home packed lunch.

You can do both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please don’t teach your kid school lunch is unhealthy. It’s the only food many kids at Title 1 schools gets during the day. Also, I don’t know a single cafeteria that would allow a K kid to have 4 cheese sticks. Put a little money in her card and let her choose! By making it forbidden you are increasing the allure. Let her buy for 2 weeks and then she’ll probably enjoy a home packed lunch.

You can do both.

Not everyone can afford to buy school lunches.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:(My oldest is in K, so forgive the ignorance)

We pack a lunch for DD every day. We've never put money on her card because we don't want her buying the school lunch (it's pretty unhealthy IMO). She attends a title one school and nearly everyone gets a free lunch in her class. She's pretty upset she can't go get the lunch too. Yesterday she pretended that she didn't have a lunch and they let her get 4 cheese sticks instead.

We talked to her about this and told her that she had a nice lunch packed (in fact there was a cheesestick in there!). Do we owe the school? Should I say something to the teacher who sent home a note? Everyone thinks we didn't send her with a lunch, when that wasn't the case. I'm also kind of shocked they let a kid only eat 4 cheese sticks for lunch. Is there a way to have backup money on the card, but block it normally?

If nearly everyone gets a free lunch at your school, it’s likely that you also qualify for free lunch. At a certain threshold, everyone at the school qualifies because it’s not worth administering a fee for lunch system for the 20 students that wouldn’t automatically qualify for free lunch. Talk to your school administration to see if that’s the case for you.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think your family is a good fit for this school, because you seem to have some deep prejudices about the people at this school. You are probably passing those prejudices to your kid subconsciously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please don’t teach your kid school lunch is unhealthy. It’s the only food many kids at Title 1 schools gets during the day. Also, I don’t know a single cafeteria that would allow a K kid to have 4 cheese sticks. Put a little money in her card and let her choose! By making it forbidden you are increasing the allure. Let her buy for 2 weeks and then she’ll probably enjoy a home packed lunch.

You can do both.

Not everyone can afford to buy school lunches.

That did not seem to be OP’s complaint.