Year-long move to LA: What to do with 20 and 22 y.o.?

[Anonymous]

In the next two months, I may have the opportunity to take a career-enhancing position that would require me to move to Seattle for a year. I am single, and my sons, 20 and 22, are in college. One attends school in Minnesota and the other in Pennsylvania. My job would pay for all my living expenses (food, lodging, etc.) while I am on the assignment.

If I take the position, I am considering renting my house here while I am in Seattle. However, that would require my sons to live with me there vs. here at home while they are not in school, which equals approx. four of the twelve months. I would get a large enough place in Seattle to accommodate the three of us, knowing they won't be there much.

I have reservations about renting my house to strangers, but I also don't want it sitting vacant for eight months.

Am I being selfish to rent out the house here and requiring them to uproot their home lives to move to Seattle, or should I not rent my house, so they have their place to come home to during the months they aren't in school? FYI-- my ex is deceased, and we have few relatives, so living elsewhere is not an option for them when they come home.

[Anonymous]

It’s just for a year. They’ll be fine. And so will renting your house.

[Anonymous]

I would rent your house out for the year. I would also encourage your kids to use this opportunity to find a summer job/internship either in Seattle or somewhere else in the country. If they have great friends at home maybe you could give them each a plane ticket to go visit their friends.

I hope you get to take this chance to explore a new corner of the country!

[Anonymous]

Why can't you let your 20 and 22 year olds live in the house for the 4 months they are out of school? It's their home and it will give them a chance to be on their own. I'm sure they would love it. You could fly them out for Christmas.

[Anonymous]

Have your adult children stay in their own apartments at school or sublet in the city they live in over the summer.

[Anonymous]

I'd rent it out! I have a 19 y.o. who just finished her first year of college in Chicago, and she rented a place and is working a bit over the summer. It's been a great "adulting" experience!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can't you let your 20 and 22 year olds live in the house for the 4 months they are out of school? It's their home and it will give them a chance to be on their own. I'm sure they would love it. You could fly them out for Christmas.

This was my thought, but it's the other 8 months of a vacant house that concerns me, and also it feels foolish to pay a mortgage/utilities for an empty house. I also run the risk of my sons having their own lives/plans next summer that won't include coming home to the vacant house.

[Anonymous]

You are over thinking this. Rent your house out, you never know what your kids will want to do in the summers, they may have internships or jobs elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Great time for them to intern, sublet an apt, work in another city with friends, go abroad, etc. They can spend school holidays with you on the west coast.

[Anonymous]

Rent it to a single person with the understanding they may have room mates off and on -- your sons. There must be some young person in town for a year who would like to live in a house.

[Anonymous]

Why would it be uprooting them, exactly? Wouldn't they be excited to try out a new city for a few months?

I spent my childhood moving from country to country, OP, and my kids went with me to live in Europe for up to 6 months at a time. We left our house vacant: we shut off the water and went conservative on the A/C and heat, just enough so the house didn't roast in the summer and the cold didn't explode the pipes; and I contracted with a lawn-mowing service.

I would give your sons the choice of living with you, living at the original house, or going back and forth and checking on the house.

Sounds like you will all have a great time, actually

[Anonymous]

IDK my parents sold our home and moved many states away the day I graduated HS. So, all visits after that was going to a place I had no connection to. And here's what happened and I consider it advantages: I began my adult life, I think earlier than most. I began early thinking about my future, my plans, where I wanted to settle eventually. Second, if I wanted to go back to my old "home" area, that was something I had to arrange. Be in touch with old friends, finance it, make it happen.

[Anonymous]

I know lots of kids whose parents moved permanently while they were in college. They all adjusted and visited mom and dad at their new home.

[Anonymous]

Tell them they are summering in Seattle this year. No big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rent it to a single person with the understanding they may have room mates off and on -- your sons. There must be some young person in town for a year who would like to live in a house.

This is not a good idea. All other suggestions are fine.