Can you create a bad or good sleeper?

[Anonymous]

I have an infant that had never been a good sleeper. We do not believe in CIO or any form of sleeping training - he’s held for all naps and we co-sleep often at night. My good friend has a baby the same age who is a really good sleeper. She is very pro sleep training and schedules. She doesn’t believe in co-sleeping and sleep trained at 4 months old. She had made remarks several times about how I need to sleep train and that me holding my baby for all naps is preventing him from self-soothing. I think some babies are just not good sleepers. Are some babies just better sleepers or can you do things to make a bad sleeper a good sleeper?

[Anonymous]

I think you should read your post to yourself. Yes some babies are naturally easier than others. Some children are easier than others, some teens are easier than others. In general a baby who is held for all naps and doesn't learn to fall asleep on their own will be a harder baby than a baby who is put down, is on a schedule and learns to fall asleep on their own.

[Anonymous]

I think you created a bad sleeper. Some kids are just terrible sleepers, but majority of them can be trained. You have created a sleep crutch for your child with constant holding and co-sleeping. He will never sleep on his own if you never let him CIO or use any form of sleep training. You’re creating the problem.

[Anonymous]

NO

[Anonymous]

You don’t believe in training of any kind so you reap what you sow

[Anonymous]

Maybe some are born a certain way, but if you were TRYING to make a bad sleeper, you'd do all the things you're doing.

[Anonymous]

You are a train wreck, OP.

It's your JOB to guide your child to be a good sleeper. YOUR JOB.

[Anonymous]

Of course you can create good and bad sleepers. Of course some babies struggle more than others. Both of these things are true. You should reach out to a slew consultant or at least do some research on infant sleep. Your baby may be a bad sleeper, but you’re certainly not helping.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you created a bad sleeper. Some kids are just terrible sleepers, but majority of them can be trained. You have created a sleep crutch for your child with constant holding and co-sleeping. He will never sleep on his own if you never let him CIO or use any form of sleep training. You’re creating the problem.

This.

Anecdotally, every mom I know with bad sleepers does things that aren’t good for encouraging sleep. For example, running in the baby’s room at every peep, refusing to sleep train, and not getting their baby on a schedule.

If you’re not sleeping training and you hold your baby for naps then that’s why your kid doesn’t sleep.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you can create a terrible sleeper by doing what you are doing. If you are lucky, your kid will start sleeping at 3 or so. If you aren’t, you’ll be wondering why you 10 year old keeps waking you up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you created a bad sleeper. Some kids are just terrible sleepers, but majority of them can be trained. You have created a sleep crutch for your child with constant holding and co-sleeping. He will never sleep on his own if you never let him CIO or use any form of sleep training. You’re creating the problem.

This.

Anecdotally, every mom I know with bad sleepers does things that aren’t good for encouraging sleep. For example, running in the baby’s room at every peep, refusing to sleep train, and not getting their baby on a schedule.

If you’re not sleeping training and you hold your baby for naps then that’s why your kid doesn’t sleep.

Agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you created a bad sleeper. Some kids are just terrible sleepers, but majority of them can be trained. You have created a sleep crutch for your child with constant holding and co-sleeping. He will never sleep on his own if you never let him CIO or use any form of sleep training. You’re creating the problem.

This.

Anecdotally, every mom I know with bad sleepers does things that aren’t good for encouraging sleep. For example, running in the baby’s room at every peep, refusing to sleep train, and not getting their baby on a schedule.

If you’re not sleeping training and you hold your baby for naps then that’s why your kid doesn’t sleep.

100%

[Anonymous]

I think people (kids) are who they are and some are “good” sleepers and some are not. That said, I think it’s actually negligent to not teach your child to sleep in a bed by themselves. I co-slept etc but still made a point to at least try to have my babies go to bed in their cribs for naps.

[Anonymous]

My babies were both not good sleepers when they were babies. We did Ferber and they became better sleepers. It's absolutely something you can work on.

[Anonymous]

My first was not a naturally good sleeper, she woke up every three hours for the first full year. But we did not ever allow cosleeping and we kept her on her nap schedule to compensate for less sleep at night. Usually night time wake ups involved some rocking and consoling but she would go back in her crib always. Eventually she did start sleeping through the night without any CIO and we already had good sleep habits established from consistently having her fall asleep in her crib and nap at set times.

I feel like there’s a middle ground between CIO and cosleeping. We just know too many people now w 5 year olds who come into their parents beds every night and we are so glad to not have that problem. It is exhausting to get up all the time but it was worth it to stick to our routine.