Soon to be 6 year old still struggling with potty training.

[Anonymous]

Please help, or tell me everything will be ok. My soon to be 6 year old son is still really struggling with potty training. Mostly for BM. His birthday is in July and needs to start kindergarten in August. Everyone has always said “oh don’t worry no one goes to kindergarten in diapers “ well I’m really worried. He does ok with peeing in the toilet about 75% of the time but absolutely will not poop in the toilet. He will ONLY go in a diaper. He knows he has to go and will come ask for a diaper and he will go stand in the bathroom next to the toilet to go but if we refuse to put a diaper on him he will refuse to go. He has will power like I have never seen and will just not go for DAYS or will just go in his underwear. He goes to Mother’s Day out 3 days a week and does pretty good there but does wet his pants some days and has BM accidents about every other week or so. They will help him change and get cleaned up but once in kindergarten they won’t. Plus I don’t want him to be known as the kindergarten kid who always has accidents. He is right on track with all other developmental milestones. Has anyone else been thru this? If we don’t have this resolved by August what do we do?

[Anonymous]

I think you need to move this to the special concerns board. This is not at all typical when most kids are potty trained/no longer using diapers (at least during day time/wake time) at 2-3. What does his pediatrician say?

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Take off the diaper. Make him clean himself up. Is he Nt?

[Anonymous]

He needs natural consequences for when he does this. If he can’t be trusted to use a toilet he can’t go out and do fun stuff. Get more fiber in him too, gummies or mirilax if need be. Find his currency, what does he really want? The only kid I knew who was still
Doing this at 5 was the son of a psychologist who thought it would be damaging to “ push him” regarding potty training. So there he was at 5.5 still doing this. He wanted s toy one day and she took him if he went to the toilet her could have it. That was the end of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to move this to the special concerns board. This is not at all typical when most kids are potty trained/no longer using diapers (at least during day time/wake time) at 2-3. What does his pediatrician say?

Good luck.

I thought that forum was more for blended family and custody divorce type situations.

His pediatrician says she does not think there is a physical or medical issue, and that “he will get it figured out soon” she doesn’t seem too concerned. Last time I talked to her was in February and said just said to keep working with him and that 6 months was a long time and she was sure he would be ok come August. I’m getting more and more worried.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Take off the diaper. Make him clean himself up. Is he Nt?

I’m not sure what NT means?

We have tired everything. Making him clean himself, taking away privileges, offering rewards including toys, candy, special outings he wants to do, you name it, also punishment, we even had his older cousin who he really looks up to try to talk to him. He did go sit on the potty for him but that was it. Nothing came of it.

[Anonymous]

This is really not normal OP. I think you have been way too complacent. Potty training should have happened 4 years ago. Your pediatrician never said anything about that? Your child should be in kindergarten right now and able to use the bathroom like his peers, but instead you are giving diapers so he can poop in them. Sorry but you need a wake up call. Things just don't magically get better if you don't make the effort.

[Anonymous]

OP NT means neurotypical, so not special needs. You need to have a serious come to Jesus conversation with him. No more diapers, loose flitting clothes, and plan on staying home for a week. He can go out for walks only. He’s 5 not 2 so you need to let him know this is not a negotiation anymore.

[Anonymous]

Have you bribed him? My son pooped in a pull up well into his 4th year. I, stupidly, refused to bribe him because…why bribe your kid to poop? I have very few parenting regrets and that is one of them.

Find his currency and do it BIG. You don’t want your kid to be the kid known for pooping his pants. That stuff follows you.

[Anonymous]

He's going to start KG at 6? Are you sure there aren't bigger problems?

[Anonymous]

Yeah I would spike his drinks with Miralax, dedicate a long weekend (Memorial Day?) to the effort. Arm yourself with MnMs and toy trains or whatever immediate bribe you think could work (maybe go shopping ahead of time). Go big or go home!!

[Anonymous]

OP, this sounds stressful for you. I’m don’t mean to pile on, but this is not normal at all. I would look for a new pediatrician because of her lack of concern.

According to the Mayo Clinic “ Potty training success hinges on physical, developmental and behavioral milestones, not age. Many children show signs of being ready for potty training between ages 18 and 24 months. However, others might not be ready until they're 3 years old. There's no rush. If you start too early, it might take longer to train your child.”

If you have genuinely tried potty training and it hasn’t worked, I wonder about a possible disability. You need to ask to move this to special needs.

[Anonymous]

Your pediatrician is an idiot. And give that your kid might have some sort of special needs that she has completely missed.

Barring that, you need to lay down the law and get this done. It sounds like you are massively babying him…he’s five and no preschool? Just Mother’s Day out..that’s for toddlers. Maybe his problem is that he needs peers his own age.

[Anonymous]

He needs to see a specialist at this point. Get rid of the diapers and make him sit on the toilet when he has to go.

[Anonymous]

Go see a pediatric GI specialist. There maybe some bowel issues that are making pooping difficult. You can have blocked bowels and not know it because looser stool oozes around the blockage.