Thanks to the Landon discussion, a new way to look at Big Three, or Four, or...

[Anonymous]

The renewed interest in school cultures resulting from the horror at UVA has made me realize that the natural division among private schools in our area is not the measure of Ivy acceptances or merit finalists, but their philosophies: most schools, though good to excellent academically, still cater to wealthy, established families who are all to some extent very satisfied with the worlds they inhabit and happy to produce kids who are high-achieving versions of their handsome, athletic, successful, alpha parents; schools like Maret, GDS, Sidwell, Burke, Field and a number of the K through 8th schools are excellent academically and at the same time encourage their students to stretch beyond their (mostly) comfortable origins and explore the entire range of their own potentials, emotions, resources, etc. We've had children in the latter group of schools and are even more grateful these days for that.

[Anonymous]

troll alert. yes indeed, sidwell and maret are full of just plain old people with wonderful values. Please.

[Anonymous]

I would submit that the Obamas and Holders of the world are the exception, not the rule.

[Anonymous]

pp here, what I mean is in that there are a small handful of "prominent" people at some of the schools, but they ar mostly made of of "everyday" families, not super wealthy, not high-powered and certainly not with the country club, self-entitled attitudes that are prevalent at other private schools.

Indeed, even the Obama's and Holders, while high-profile, are not self-entitled.

[Anonymous]

Cheap attempt to get a plug in for some lesser schools at the expense of a girl's death. Deplorable.

[Anonymous]

``lesser'' schools. You are the one that's deplorable with your ``big three'' caste-system mentality. You are a loser.

[Anonymous]

Tons of money at Sidwell, GDS and Maret too. Pick the school that feels best for your child but don't think any good DC independent will be without wealthy and privileged families.

[Anonymous]

I could, but won't, tell unpleasant stories about rude actions by kids at every school in DC. I could also tell stories about great grounded kids at the very same schools. In the end it is a mix, and about how individual families raise their kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cheap attempt to get a plug in for some lesser schools at the expense of a girl's death. Deplorable.

"Lesser" schools? Ouch.

[Anonymous]

9:10 Every school in DC? You certainly get around!

[Anonymous]

I know some reasonable, intelligent and kind young people who live in the wrong side of town

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The renewed interest in school cultures resulting from the horror at UVA has made me realize that the natural division among private schools in our area is not the measure of Ivy acceptances or merit finalists, but their philosophies: most schools, though good to excellent academically, still cater to wealthy, established families who are all to some extent very satisfied with the worlds they inhabit and happy to produce kids who are high-achieving versions of their handsome, athletic, successful, alpha parents; schools like Maret, GDS, Sidwell, Burke, Field and a number of the K through 8th schools are excellent academically and at the same time encourage their students to stretch beyond their (mostly) comfortable origins and explore the entire range of their own potentials, emotions, resources, etc. We've had children in the latter group of schools and are even more grateful these days for that.

Last time I checked, these were all good virtues. I "get" the discussion about school cultures, but it is so reverse classist it kills me. If you made similar negative arguments about all the boys from Ballou, for example, you'd be shouted off the board as a racist. Most kids from privileged backgrounds don't beat up women, let alone kill them. And, I'd wager if the kid had been from any other private, everyone would be rushing to condemn that school's culture too. Enough already folks.

[Anonymous]

Here you go. There is a horrible culture of violence, drug abuse and teenage pregnancy at inner city DC schools where kids are killing each other like its the wild west. Their parents have failed to supervise them and their teachers and coaches in many cases are also part of the problem because they too are products of the culture. Is that racist, classist or elitist? No. That's the fact. We are working hard to fix those problem here in DC. But what's the first step to fixing a problem...Acknowledging you have one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: produce kids who are high-achieving .... handsome, athletic, successful

OP: If our school helps our kids turn out this way, that would be good enough for us. The kids are in school for only about 180 days a year, leaving plenty of time for values and interests to be shaped by family shared experiences.

But I have bad news for you, while all the schools that you mention have slightly different cultures, the DC schools are just the different flavors of the same product. While parents may have different definitions of "successful" in mind, the schools have overlapping applicant pools and similar academic objectives. The cultural differences between them are minor when compared to differences between public and private DC schools, or even schools outside the beltway.

[Anonymous]

Okay, I'll bite, even though I think this conversation is basically flame-inducing no matter how carefully it is broached.

In the past, I have seen threads where folks have tried to ask if their more sensitive, quirky boy would find like-minded peers and friends at various schools. I think they were trying to identify schools where the culture might include individuals like the Landon LAX team but maybe not elevate those kids to hero status. Some boys are very athletically gifted, aggressive, etc. and they can also be perfectly lovely kids. But one hopes for a culture where kids who might be less ... lovely ... are not rewarded. It's the other kids who are the enablers more than anything else, which I find frustrating.

Coed over single sex schools seem like a good idea ... being female, I view other females as helpful in balancing the testosterone in a mix of kids. A strong sports program need not be bad as long as ohter aspects of the school's program are also highly valued (arts, music, academics, etc.) Some would argue that a religious component could be healthy, although I can think of schools that have that but STILL are too alpha-male in culture for my taste. And schools that take seriously the effort to admit socioeconomic diversity has got to be a good thing.

Sorry that I have no magical list of schools to offer ... just starting the process of looking at high schools. One thiing I know is taht some of the area's "best" publics have very similar culture as Landon, et al ... lots of wealth and entitlement to go around.