Anderson Cooper is a dad!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's old and this shouldn't be glorified. Kids need two parents. He won't even be around to see the mental trauma this imposes on an innocent child. It's so, so selfish and narcissistic.

I literally disagree with each and every single point you made.

He's old. No, he's middle aged.
This shouldn't be glorified. To who? Men who are middle aged? Do you truly think men in that stage of their lives are impressionable and impulsive?
His "innocent child" will be an adult when Anderson dies. Adults whose parents die of natural causes when the adult child is in their mid 20's generally do fine.
It's selfish and narcissistic. Um, EVERYONE who has/gets a baby does it because THEY want to be a parent. Inherently having children is selfish and narcissistic. And wildly accepted as an acceptable way to BE selfish.

[Anonymous]

My DH is 52 and wants another baby. I'm going to show him this thread to prove he's too old.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:So whose the mother?

Probably a 20-something who just made $500k.

Kids need mothers. Hopefully, she will be involved in some way.

My happily adjusted adult niece and nephew of two dads would disagree.

Also, my four kids of two moms would disagree that kids need dads.

Kids need LOVE. Period.

As someone who was in the system and aged out, I will proclaim that over and over and over. Adoption rules need to be overhauled. Love matters the most, NOT the size of the parent's paycheck or that each kid has their own room or that they are given a five-star life. Can their needs be met? Great, adopt away!

What else are they going to say? They don't want to hurt your feelings AND they don't know what they are missing!

This. That you have a few examples of presumably "happily adjusted" adults does not change the reality for millions of people, and the fact that nature designs all humans to grow up in the care of an intact home, with a mother and a father. Can kids who don't have that overcome and do well? Of course. But it's still the desired state.

IMO, 2 moms is fine.

No moms is NOT fine. Every kid should have (at least) one mom.

My sister in law died from cancer when my niece was two. She has no memory of a mom. Is that okay with you, or should by brother just give her up for adoption?

That's really sad. No child should lose their mother that young.

But, yeah I stand by my statement. Every kid should have a mom.

[Anonymous]

Anderson's dad died in Manhattan, New York City on January 5, 1978, at age 50, during open heart surgery, after having a heart attack the previous December.

But yes, please keep telling us how he's got perfect genetics and is certainly going to live to be 90-yo.

Anderson is a typical narcissistic rich phony.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:To the people questioning his age at becoming a father-- his mother just died within the last year. She was 43 when she had him and still lived to see him past his 50th birthday. So I think genetics are on their side.

He was close with his mother, and she was quite a character with a remarkable life story. If anyone hasn't seen the documentary about them, Nothing Left Unsaid, I highly recommend it. I found it really uplifting, and it stayed with me for a long time.

Just proved my point. Mothers ARE important and not just for their eggs and uterus. Hope Anderson lets his baby know his mother

Which "mother" would that be, just to be curious? The egg donor or the surrogate? If the egg donor has no interest in being anyone's parent, should Anderson then hold a gun to her head? If the surrogate already has her own biological children and husband, does Anderson need to demand an invite to her house?

Does this also mean single women who choose to become pregnant should search for their sperm donors and demand their children get to know their fathers?

My best friend donated eggs when we were in college, close to 20 years ago. She is child free by choice. She would be pretty horrified if a random stranger showed up and demanded a mother-child relationship.

Which mother? That is not my decision to make. Ideally, I don't think the situation should be at all because it is not in the best interest of the child. Money should not be involved in creating life. This child has two mothers but won't know either. Doesn't that make it sad to you? Hopefully, Anderson will provide some mother figure but, it isn't the same.

So a surrogate with zero biological connection to a child is now its mother? Are sperm donors fathers, then? And does this mean adoptive parents aren't really parents, since they didn't birth or donate DNA to the child AND money is involved in adoption? And are you also thinking IVF should not be allowed, since money is involved?

I'm failing to see where I'm supposed to be sad... over a wanted child born into a secure and loving home? Please explain it to me. There is no scientific evidence showing children can't thrive with one parent or two same-sex parents. I see no anecdotal evidence via children of my LGBT friends, either - they are happy and healthy. The most unhappy children I know were raised in a home where their parents hated each other and "stayed together for the kids". I'm definitely sad for them, having to grow up in that tense, miserable home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I saw the clip of his announcement and you could tell he was so overjoyed and emotional. He mentioned that he never dreamed when he was gay kid that we would be a father.

He's back at work on day 3?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:So whose the mother?

Probably a 20-something who just made $500k.

Kids need mothers. Hopefully, she will be involved in some way.

My happily adjusted adult niece and nephew of two dads would disagree.

Also, my four kids of two moms would disagree that kids need dads.

Kids need LOVE. Period.

As someone who was in the system and aged out, I will proclaim that over and over and over. Adoption rules need to be overhauled. Love matters the most, NOT the size of the parent's paycheck or that each kid has their own room or that they are given a five-star life. Can their needs be met? Great, adopt away!

What else are they going to say? They don't want to hurt your feelings AND they don't know what they are missing!

This. That you have a few examples of presumably "happily adjusted" adults does not change the reality for millions of people, and the fact that nature designs all humans to grow up in the care of an intact home, with a mother and a father. Can kids who don't have that overcome and do well? Of course. But it's still the desired state.

IMO, 2 moms is fine.

No moms is NOT fine. Every kid should have (at least) one mom.

My sister in law died from cancer when my niece was two. She has no memory of a mom. Is that okay with you, or should by brother just give her up for adoption?

That's really sad. No child should lose their mother that young.

But, yeah I stand by my statement. Every kid should have a mom.

Since that's how you feel, that's what you should do and teach your kids. But you should also recognize that's just your own personal feelings, which do not matter to anyone besides you and maybe your family. They aren't based in facts of any sort.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:He's too old. Should have picked up this hobby 10 years ago if this is what he wanted to do.

Maybe it wasn't what he wanted ten years ago though.

Right. And his wants are what's most important? Not what's best for a baby/ child?

+1. It doesn't matter because I like his show and his politics align with mine.

Wait, so all the heterosexual parents first consider what's best for the baby, prior to deciding to conceive? I guess all of DCUM is financially stable, healthy, in happy marriages that will go the distance, and the right age to have kids... otherwise they don't bother.

Oh wait...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So whose the mother?

Probably a 20-something who just made $500k.

Kids need mothers. Hopefully, she will be involved in some way.

My happily adjusted adult niece and nephew of two dads would disagree.

Also, my four kids of two moms would disagree that kids need dads.

Kids need LOVE. Period.

As someone who was in the system and aged out, I will proclaim that over and over and over. Adoption rules need to be overhauled. Love matters the most, NOT the size of the parent's paycheck or that each kid has their own room or that they are given a five-star life. Can their needs be met? Great, adopt away!

DP (first response on this thread). I agree that kids need love most of all. I also believe that in many (most?) cases, two parents (of any sex or gender) are better than one. Two parents are more likely to create or find balance. It also gives kids more outlets, choices, time with a parent. My position on this comes from my own childhood, as the child of a single mom (by divorce, father moved out of state) who was a horrible parent -- rages, threats, abuse, narcissism. There was only ever her way, her choices, her priorities. Another adult in the house would have been so much better for me.

I also base my opinion on many of the single parents by choice that I know personally -- not all, but many are rather self absorbed and are single because they cannot (or don't want to) compromise in the ways that we all need to do for healthy adult relationships. Some are very controlling of their children. They also are their kids whole world, in ways that, in my observation and opinion, can be unhealthy. I don't think that's an ideal environment for kids.

I also wonder, in situations like Anderson Cooper who has a big job and works a lot, who is really raising those children. Does a single parent like that (I"m sure he's a great person, means well, and will love that little boy) really meet the child's needs (or will he give he child a five star life and pay others to meet those needs?).

I am NOT saying that there should be a law against single parenthood, or that children should be taken away from divorced or widowed parents or anything absurd like that. None of it is easy and I worry that we have reached a point where we are so eager to celebrate single parenthood that we stop asking what's best for the child.

[Anonymous]

I'm genuinely surprised by the bizzarro kids needs moms thing happening here.

Good for him! Kids need love, that's it.

[Anonymous]

From Daddy to Dad. Congrats to Anderson.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of the negativity in this thread makes me sad. My best friend and his husband are about to become parents via surrogate. They are amazing people and will be wonderful parents. I hate that this baby, who is deeply wanted and loved already, is going to face crappy people like some of you.

?

Nobody is criticizing your friends.

AC is 52 and single. That’s worrisome.

[Anonymous]

I think his mom's death is what pushed AC to do this. Maybe he was thinking about it before, but the timing seems more than coincidental. She died in June 2019. It's possible he wanted to become a dad a few years ago but waited until after her death because caring for her while working full time and working on their book left him time for little else.

I do question the wisdom of doing this when you're in your 50s, not in a strong relationship, and have a super demanding job. I think part of this is just wanting a family or a biological connection to another person.

[Anonymous]

AC doesn’t care what you haters think, so feel free to run around shrieking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think his mom's death is what pushed AC to do this. Maybe he was thinking about it before, but the timing seems more than coincidental. She died in June 2019. It's possible he wanted to become a dad a few years ago but waited until after her death because caring for her while working full time and working on their book left him time for little else.

I do question the wisdom of doing this when you're in your 50s, not in a strong relationship, and have a super demanding job. I think part of this is just wanting a family or a biological connection to another person.

Amazing how most people manage to work full time and even care for family members and still have children.

I would never say no to anyone who wants a child but why didn't Anderson Cooper do this ten years ago? It makes a huge difference.

I'm sure he'll be a great dad. And to be frank, he won't be the first old dad around either. In his world, it's not uncommon for men in their 50s and on second marriages to have a second family. So it's not a big deal for me - except that there's no spouse that I'm aware of to be there in case he gets cancer and kicks off quickly when the kid's 10. So while I'm happy for Anderson, it's not without a bit of reservation.