Going to a Catholic school if you're not Catholic?

[Anonymous]

^^^ it’s not my problem. You actually wrote that you “ignore the church” as you drive by and are baffled that someone would be offended by that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My biggest takeaway from this thread is how bigoted and intolerant many of you are.

OP, I’m the mom of two kids in a Catholic school, 5th grade and 8th grade. We are also not catholic and we came to our school also because of location! Our public has a good reputation for academics, but we hate its size and our Catholic school is about 8 minutes from our house. We could have made a private work but we also wanted our kids to be in a “neighborhood” school so friends and activities would be part of our community.

I often forget the school is Catholic or even religious, ignoring that I drive past the church on its grounds daily and the school name as Saint in its name. Homework is rarely about anything related to religion. Our 5th grader recently did a project on saints. It wasn’t a “Catholic” project - our Christian faith also believes in saints. None of the parents have ever said anything to us about our faith. I think some know, kind of in the way you just happen to learn things about people over time. Certainly nobody from the school had ever made it an issue. My kids have never minded the weekly masses. The homily lessons have seemingly really been on a kid’s level - how to be a good friend and neighbor, how to do the right thing even when it is hard to do, how to forgive other people. I don’t think those are Catholic ideals per se but will let the righteous on this board tell me if I am wrong. I’m sure my kids got holy water sprinkled on them at some point. It hasn’t phased them. the priest certainly must know that some of the children are non Catholic. Doesn’t seem like it bothered him either.

The only times it has really been apparent are the sacrament years (second and eighth at our school) when kids do some projects (workbooks, reflections) focused on those sacraments. They do the work in religious class because otherwise the kids would be doing it in Sunday school. And sometimes, we will be out and about after school when the kids are still in their uniforms and will run into a friend or neighbor who will say “oh I didn’t realize you are catholic!” I explain that we just go to the school and all is well again. (As an aside, uniforms are AMAZING)

If you can live with all of that, you’ll be fine. As others have said, it really is not a thing about who is what religion or who goes to mass. The people on this thread claiming it is a thing are not living it daily. I am, and can tell you we remain very happy with our decision in the school.

Totally disingenuous. Catholic school is Catholic school. Good or bad it's still Catholic school with Catholic values, thoughts, etc. By default putting your kid or kids there and saying it doesn't effect my family is not truthful. Of course it does.

I'm not bashing Catholic school this would be the same if someone chose any other private religious school. There is a part of you that is ok with the teachings of religion at that school otherwise you would not be paying to send your kid there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^ it’s not my problem. You actually wrote that you “ignore the church” as you drive by and are baffled that someone would be offended by that.

No, she didn’t. Quotes only work for something someone actually said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^ it’s not my problem. You actually wrote that you “ignore the church” as you drive by and are baffled that someone would be offended by that.

No, she didn’t. Quotes only work for something someone actually said.

Sorry. She's "ignoring...the church". Is that better?

--DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^ it’s not my problem. You actually wrote that you “ignore the church” as you drive by and are baffled that someone would be offended by that.

No, she didn’t. Quotes only work for something someone actually said.

Sorry. She's "ignoring...the church". Is that better?

--DP

No, you changed her meaning. Why are you such a hateful person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally disingenuous. Catholic school is Catholic school. Good or bad it's still Catholic school with Catholic values, thoughts, etc. By default putting your kid or kids there and saying it doesn't effect my family is not truthful. Of course it does.

I'm not bashing Catholic school this would be the same if someone chose any other private religious school. There is a part of you that is ok with the teachings of religion at that school otherwise you would not be paying to send your kid there.

Disingenuous? PP seems clear on the lessons her kids are learning and never said she does not want her kids exposed to religion.

How does having non-Catholics in a class affect your family? Have you taken your concerns to your school’s principal or the archdiocese?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Totally disingenuous. Catholic school is Catholic school. Good or bad it's still Catholic school with Catholic values, thoughts, etc. By default putting your kid or kids there and saying it doesn't effect my family is not truthful. Of course it does.

I'm not bashing Catholic school this would be the same if someone chose any other private religious school. There is a part of you that is ok with the teachings of religion at that school otherwise you would not be paying to send your kid there.

Disingenuous? PP seems clear on the lessons her kids are learning and never said she does not want her kids exposed to religion.

How does having non-Catholics in a class affect your family? Have you taken your concerns to your school’s principal or the archdiocese?

There’s an expectation on the part of some, many or even most Catholics that when they send their children to Catholic schools that they have their faith reinforced, not just in Religion class, but in all areas of their experience at school. And that going to this school helps build the Catholic community. The presence of non-Catholics dilutes that experience.

Kids that are deprogrammed at home talk to their classmates.

We get that you want to hitch-hike along on the Catholic schools because you don’t like you public choice and you don’t want to pay for the secular alternative.

No one needs to talk to their priest. The administration of the school knows that they dare not go beyond a certain point admitting non-Catholics and this varies by parish. They don’t want the parishioners to arrive at the conclusion that theirs really isn’t a Catholic school at all, but rather just a discount private school supported in part by the parish and or archdiocese.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My family immigrated from a Muslim country and many of them attended Catholic schools as children (this was in the 1950s and 1960s). It was no big deal over there and I can’t understand why it would be a big deal here in our great “melting pot” of a nation.

I think the atheists over here make it a big deal. Those of faith (including the prior Jewish poster) don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Totally disingenuous. Catholic school is Catholic school. Good or bad it's still Catholic school with Catholic values, thoughts, etc. By default putting your kid or kids there and saying it doesn't effect my family is not truthful. Of course it does.

I'm not bashing Catholic school this would be the same if someone chose any other private religious school. There is a part of you that is ok with the teachings of religion at that school otherwise you would not be paying to send your kid there.

Disingenuous? PP seems clear on the lessons her kids are learning and never said she does not want her kids exposed to religion.

How does having non-Catholics in a class affect your family? Have you taken your concerns to your school’s principal or the archdiocese?

There’s an expectation on the part of some, many or even most Catholics that when they send their children to Catholic schools that they have their faith reinforced, not just in Religion class, but in all areas of their experience at school. And that going to this school helps build the Catholic community. The presence of non-Catholics dilutes that experience.

Kids that are deprogrammed at home talk to their classmates.

We get that you want to hitch-hike along on the Catholic schools because you don’t like you public choice and you don’t want to pay for the secular alternative.

No one needs to talk to their priest. The administration of the school knows that they dare not go beyond a certain point admitting non-Catholics and this varies by parish. They don’t want the parishioners to arrive at the conclusion that theirs really isn’t a Catholic school at all, but rather just a discount private school supported in part by the parish and or archdiocese.

Please stop pretending to speak to the beliefs of many or most Catholic parents at a school. You sound downright nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family immigrated from a Muslim country and many of them attended Catholic schools as children (this was in the 1950s and 1960s). It was no big deal over there and I can’t understand why it would be a big deal here in our great “melting pot” of a nation.

I think the atheists over here make it a big deal. Those of faith (including the prior Jewish poster) don't.

The Melting Pot idea is a dated concept.

What we appear to have today is more of a tossed salad in which the components all retain their own characteristics.

And rapid assimilation seems to be another forgotten concept. When’s the last time assimilation has even been mentioned?

[Anonymous]

All the stereotypes on this thread are 100% true

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, seriously you just wrote that you want your kids to attend Catholic school because it’s close to your house?

It is a religion. The people that run those schools, participate in the parish life, give and fund the school in part, all the teachers, are there to raise and teach ALL the children the Catholic faith.

You’re okay with your child doing “prayer hands” every time they walk down the hall? Kneeling and praying and placing a flower at Mary’s statue on her day? Your child being “sprinkled” with holy water on some feast days as the priest chants a prayer? Lighting candles and placing them at the altar to honor all the children who have died in abortions? These are just examples off the top of my head from my kids school. K , 3 and 7.

It is not a public school where they go to a religion class like an art class and your ignorance of this is what is making us Catholics a little crazy here.

Classic case of Catholic intolerance of others.

I am Catholic and think PP is nuts. All are welcomed at our school. I hope everyone would feel comfortable. I understand why some would not want to attend because the religion aspect is woven in to all parts of school. But a huge part of the reason I am sending my children to Catholic school is to learn how to be good people and the virtues that are reinforced in the school. I hope my kids come out of the school very tolerant of other religions, because that is certainly how I feel.

Same. There isn't one way to be Catholic, just like there isn't one way to be Lutheran or Baptist or Jewish. My kids' Catholic school doesn't do prayer hands in the hallway or the candles for aborted babies. They do the flower at the Mary statue and go to mass weekly and have many other Catholic religious ceremonial aspects. You have to evaluate each school's culture and whether it works for your family. As a Catholic family, we don't agree with everything the Church does, by a long shot. Our kids know that. The Church itself has changed over time, which means obviously there is fallibility and room for improvement, and we are good with our school's practice of Catholic education. Our school welcomes all families and we hope that the non-Catholic families will take from it the parts that resonate with them, which at very basic level must be a pretty common belief in the golden rule, the love of God and one's neighbor, and value of grace and forgiveness, and also get to know the diversity of Catholic communities.

[Anonymous]

We're Catholic and there a definitely certain Catholic schools we wouldn't go to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're Catholic and there a definitely certain Catholic schools we wouldn't go to.

yes. some are more liberal/conservative than others. some are run by jesuits, benedictines, etc. some co-ed, some not. You have to shop around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Totally disingenuous. Catholic school is Catholic school. Good or bad it's still Catholic school with Catholic values, thoughts, etc. By default putting your kid or kids there and saying it doesn't effect my family is not truthful. Of course it does.

I'm not bashing Catholic school this would be the same if someone chose any other private religious school. There is a part of you that is ok with the teachings of religion at that school otherwise you would not be paying to send your kid there.

Disingenuous? PP seems clear on the lessons her kids are learning and never said she does not want her kids exposed to religion.

How does having non-Catholics in a class affect your family? Have you taken your concerns to your school’s principal or the archdiocese?

There’s an expectation on the part of some, many or even most Catholics that when they send their children to Catholic schools that they have their faith reinforced, not just in Religion class, but in all areas of their experience at school. And that going to this school helps build the Catholic community. The presence of non-Catholics dilutes that experience.

Kids that are deprogrammed at home talk to their classmates.

We get that you want to hitch-hike along on the Catholic schools because you don’t like you public choice and you don’t want to pay for the secular alternative.

No one needs to talk to their priest. The administration of the school knows that they dare not go beyond a certain point admitting non-Catholics and this varies by parish. They don’t want the parishioners to arrive at the conclusion that theirs really isn’t a Catholic school at all, but rather just a discount private school supported in part by the parish and or archdiocese.

Please stop pretending to speak to the beliefs of many or most Catholic parents at a school. You sound downright nuts.

I don't think she or he sounds nuts. We are a non-Catholic family that chose Catholic parochial school because of mutual friends, neighborhood, family values, and someone strongly recommending said school. And yes we paid the Protestant rate (higher) for the honor. It worked fine the first year but the second year it was clear that the new head wanted the non-Catholics out. I do think it varies from type of Catholic school. Our child's experience was miserable, and it wasn't the fellow students - it was the teachers and administrators. The gossips amongst the parents was fierce. I will never become a Catholic because of how I watched that school behave and how the adults treated one another. Think carefully before heading down that path OP.