Going to a Catholic school if you're not Catholic?

[Anonymous]

The proportion of Catholics to non-Catholics is going to vary alot from school to school. In general, the worse the public schools are in your area, the more non-Catholics there will be in your local Catholic school. Some of the DC area Catholic schools are only about 50% Catholic, whereas some your kid will be the only non-Catholic in the class.

[Anonymous]

I will be the dissenting voice here. My child’s Catholic school weaves Catholicism through every aspect of their day, from doing reports on a Saint to priests visiting each class once a week and doing a lesson, to learning their math word problems with “Jesus blessed 4 children in the crowd on Wednesday. Thursday he blessed 7. How many more children were blessed on Thursday. Draw a number line blah blah blah.”

It’s imperative to understand that the Catholic schools are the biggest mission of the Catholic Church, ie, the money parishioners give in totality is used to help the schools in addition to the tuition, as it is the Catholic Church’s major goal to have children brought up in their faith.

It’s not a discounted private school, and your child’s education is being paid for in part by the church as a whole, top down.

You simply cannot take the Catholic out of Catholic school and I think it would be confusing, boring and a waste of a child’s time to be educated in a faith they didn’t believe in.

[Anonymous]

The Archdiocese publishes a report that allows you to see the self-reported religious affiliation of every school's student population. While all schools are majority Catholic, many schools have a very high percentage of non-Catholic students. However, realize that many of the non-Catholic students will still come from practicing liturgical Christian households, so they will have some familiarity with the prayers, services, and Biblical stories that they encounter at school.

Outside of weekly chapels and holiday masses, Catholicism mostly comes up in religion class. A Catholic school where I worked was fortunate to have a non-clergy member who was a gifted and empathetic religion teacher. While he did have certain topics that he needed to address to help prepare students for first communion and, later, confirmation, he seemed to tailor lessons to be broad and inclusive. Still, it's up to you as a non-Catholic whether you want your child to have several hours of religious instruction per week. The Archdiocese prescribes certain minimums, and there's no way out of it if you enroll at a Catholic school. That is time that is not spent on other academic subjects or extracurriculars.

The only other way that Catholicism influenced the school day was during sex ed for older children. Where I taught, this was not a dedicated course, the way some schools might have family life education or similar. It was a several-day portion of some science courses. It's not that the content was particularly religious. However, the content was extremely limited because of the school's religious affiliation. Children did not learn about contraception or sexually transmitted infections, for example.

Last, I noticed that the Catholic affiliation did affect some outside-of-school socializing. Many families attended the same parishes and did live near each other so as to be conveniently located to church and school. These outside-of-school opportunities to see each other led some students to be closer than others. They weren't trying to be clique-y or exclusive, but they naturally gravitated toward the other children with whom they had already spent time. A new student might have to be more outgoing and persistent to break into these established social groups.

Of course, every school will have its own culture. And within the same school, your child might have a protestant teacher or a teacher who decorates his or her classroom with posters of the Pope and rosaries. (My school employed both types of teacher.) The best way to find out if you can see a school being a good fit is to visit during the school day.

[Anonymous]

We're a non-Catholic family in our second year at a Catholic k-8. The kids have religion class and they go to Mass on Fridays. There are prayers during the day. We've never felt any pressure or weirdness from families that are members of the parish. There are many other kids at the school that aren't Catholic, so they all learn from each other. We've taught them to approach religion class like any other subject and it's taught them a lot about critical thinking and free speech. They've also blossomed since we left MCPS, so it's definitely been a tradeoff that's well worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're a non-Catholic family in our second year at a Catholic k-8. The kids have religion class and they go to Mass on Fridays. There are prayers during the day. We've never felt any pressure or weirdness from families that are members of the parish. There are many other kids at the school that aren't Catholic, so they all learn from each other. We've taught them to approach religion class like any other subject and it's taught them a lot about critical thinking and free speech. They've also blossomed since we left MCPS, so it's definitely been a tradeoff that's well worth it.

Can I ask how you feel about having a child that you do not raise Catholic nor take part in the Catholic faith yourself reciting Catholic prayers daily?
And taking part in a religious mass? I disagree that learning and practicing a religion is like math class.

I can’t imagine sending my kids to an Arabic school and having them face the sun, bow and pray, any more than I would wrap a Sheihk turban on their head and tell them “it’s just a hat”

[Anonymous]

I think it depends how your public schools are. If your public schools are really bad then the Catholic schools offer a lot of value.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're a non-Catholic family in our second year at a Catholic k-8. The kids have religion class and they go to Mass on Fridays. There are prayers during the day. We've never felt any pressure or weirdness from families that are members of the parish. There are many other kids at the school that aren't Catholic, so they all learn from each other. We've taught them to approach religion class like any other subject and it's taught them a lot about critical thinking and free speech. They've also blossomed since we left MCPS, so it's definitely been a tradeoff that's well worth it.

Can I ask how you feel about having a child that you do not raise Catholic nor take part in the Catholic faith yourself reciting Catholic prayers daily?
And taking part in a religious mass? I disagree that learning and practicing a religion is like math class.

I can’t imagine sending my kids to an Arabic school and having them face the sun, bow and pray, any more than I would wrap a Sheihk turban on their head and tell them “it’s just a hat”

DP: They are observing the faith in practice, not practicing it. They are learning about it, and maybe one day it will become their faith, just as the Catholics kids are learning about it and may one day abandon it.

[Anonymous]

What grade OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're a non-Catholic family in our second year at a Catholic k-8. The kids have religion class and they go to Mass on Fridays. There are prayers during the day. We've never felt any pressure or weirdness from families that are members of the parish. There are many other kids at the school that aren't Catholic, so they all learn from each other. We've taught them to approach religion class like any other subject and it's taught them a lot about critical thinking and free speech. They've also blossomed since we left MCPS, so it's definitely been a trade-off that's well worth it.

Can I ask how you feel about having a child that you do not raise Catholic nor take part in the Catholic faith yourself reciting Catholic prayers daily?
And taking part in a religious mass? I disagree that learning and practicing a religion is like math class.

I can’t imagine sending my kids to an Arabic school and having them face the sun, bow and pray, any more than I would wrap a Sheihk turban on their head and tell them “it’s just a hat”

DP: They are observing the faith in practice, not practicing it. They are learning about it, and maybe one day it will become their faith, just as the Catholics kids are learning about it and may one day abandon it.

The non-Catholic P here. Exactly what the DP above said. We talk about their experiences every day. They know that we don't believe in Catholicism but we need to respect that lots of other people do. My partner was raised Catholic and HATES the church, but he sees the value the kids get from their school and he rolls with it. And Mass is actually a really good way for kids to learn how to be quiet and sit still for an hour. One DD enjoys the homilies because they're "good stories."

And respectfully, an Islamic hijab or a Sikh dastar is not a Sheikh turban.

[Anonymous]

Catholic parent with two Catholic HS graduates. Mass, prayers at functions, graduation in a church - all part of the experience and if you are Catholic, it does not seem odd. I can't imagine how it would be to be a non-Catholic in the circumstances. Tune out, uncomfortable, strange - not sure. Closest I've ever come is going to weddings and funerals in other religions - you feel very different and out of place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're a non-Catholic family in our second year at a Catholic k-8. The kids have religion class and they go to Mass on Fridays. There are prayers during the day. We've never felt any pressure or weirdness from families that are members of the parish. There are many other kids at the school that aren't Catholic, so they all learn from each other. We've taught them to approach religion class like any other subject and it's taught them a lot about critical thinking and free speech. They've also blossomed since we left MCPS, so it's definitely been a trade-off that's well worth it.

Can I ask how you feel about having a child that you do not raise Catholic nor take part in the Catholic faith yourself reciting Catholic prayers daily?
And taking part in a religious mass? I disagree that learning and practicing a religion is like math class.

I can’t imagine sending my kids to an Arabic school and having them face the sun, bow and pray, any more than I would wrap a Sheihk turban on their head and tell them “it’s just a hat”

DP: They are observing the faith in practice, not practicing it. They are learning about it, and maybe one day it will become their faith, just as the Catholics kids are learning about it and may one day abandon it.

The non-Catholic P here. Exactly what the DP above said. We talk about their experiences every day. They know that we don't believe in Catholicism but we need to respect that lots of other people do. My partner was raised Catholic and HATES the church, but he sees the value the kids get from their school and he rolls with it. And Mass is actually a really good way for kids to learn how to be quiet and sit still for an hour. One DD enjoys the homilies because they're "good stories."

And respectfully, an Islamic hijab or a Sikh dastar is not a Sheikh turban.

I disagree. They are going to mass. They are saying prayers. These are the very foundations of the Catholic faith and not for show, or to say without meaning it, like you are reciting a poem. It’s completely disrespectful to me and though the example of praying with Muslims or wearing a Sikh distar was glossed over, it’s no different than sending a child into Catholic mass/school though nobody would send their child to a Muslim school in a hijab and say “oh it’s just a pretty dress, free speech!” and not be deemed incredibly offensive, nor wearing a Sikh dastar and saying it’s a hat. A plaid skirt and blouse is a more acceptable wear, that’s it. But that’s exactly what you are doing.

Especially when families who truly believe are offsetting your child’s tuition with their support of the church.

[Anonymous]

The line you wrote about “we teach them that religion class is just like any class” is flat out disrespectful and incredibly obtuse of any knowledge of religion.

[Anonymous]

Then it sounds like you're not at all comfortable with sending your children to a parochial school.

[Anonymous]

Depends. Many parochial schools are part of a parish so there is heavy involvement with the church. It's manageable but your child will be going to mass. Some independents are hardcore, as in, Opus Dei. Personally we have stayed far away from those. Other independents take a "Catholic light" approach focusing less on orthodoxy and more on social service. Definitely visit and speak to other families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What grade OP?

Kindergarten.