It irks me that both schools my kids attend are bossy about what to pack for lunch

[Anonymous]

Fat kids are cute! You just wanna squeeze em'!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate it when the language of choice is invoked to defend arbitrary exercises of power and when the language of community serves as a prelude to telling someone they should leave...

I hate it when parents exaggerate the importance of trivial rules by calling them "arbitrary exercises of power." You have to raise your hand before you speak and wait your turn-- arbitrary exercise of power. If you have a birthday party invite all the kids or less than half, you can't just exclude a few -- arbitrary exercise of power. My point was that you have three choices that are considerate of others and of the community (yes a school is a community): (1) follow the group's rules, (2) try to change the rules, (3) leave. Just ignoring the rules is not a considerate option. And with so many different private schools in this area as well as public school you can certainly find one that allows your child to bring junk food to school.

I prefer school teachers and administrators exercise power. My guess is that you do as well, and that you really truly wouldn't want your child to go to a school that didn't have and enforce rules. Its just a stupid rule about junk food. I can't understand why anyone would get exercised about it either way.

Agree. People are getting way too upset about this. I'm sure there are plenty of good lunch options that don't include cookies. Just quit whining, and pack your kid some goldfish.

[Anonymous]

Have you seen the goldfish choice? Are they really healthy?

[Anonymous]

The amount of entitlement from some parents is unbelievable.

Schools have rules. Follow them or take your spoiled brat elsewhere.

If there are limits on what is allowed to be packed in a lunch, then the school doesn't have to deal with some kids getting a treat that other kids don't.

[Anonymous]

The amount of entitlement from some parents is unbelievable. They believe they can decide not only what their own kids eat but what everyone else's kids can eat as well. If my kid can't have a treat, then neither can yours!

[Anonymous]

Great. Then we all agree.

Group hug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd prefer that school teachers and administrators exercise power in a rational manner and limited to the scope of their relationship with their students. So raise your hand to ask a question -- fine. That's classroom management and necessary to the enterprise of education.

Rules about what kids can't eat, where parents can't park (when they involve legal public spaces), and prohibitions regarding how books or food are transported seem overreaching. If school want to persuade parents (or kids) that these are good ways to behave, go to it. (The birthday party rules fall into this category for me -- good point; I'll voluntarily comply.) But when they impose these restrictions unilaterally and expect everyone to fall in line, that's not an example of community or consideration for others.

As I said, my DC's school doesn't have a junk food rule and if it did, it wouldn't affect us because I don't pack anything that would be considered junk food. What bugs me in this discussion is the assumption that any dictat from someone in authority at a school somehow binds both parents and kids regardless of whether it's an area over which the school should have any legitimate say.

And I don't think you foster respect for rules by telling people just to submit to stupid ones.

It's sad to me that so many in this thread are assuming that teachers and administrators are exercising power or making arbitrary rules, rather than establishing rules and procedures that will benefit students individually and the school as a whole. Parking rules may have to do with zoning issues, no peanut rules may have to do with having severely allergic children and not wanting a child to go into anaphylactic shock and having other students have to witness that, no wheeled backpacks may have to do with safety issues, as someone mentioned kids falling down stairs with them, and no candy/soda or other food rules may have to do with witnessing students who come to school with soda and candy for lunch and not much else. Yes, the administrators could take the time to explain every single one of these to you and the reasons behind them, and what they've witnessed over their years in education, but is that how you want your school administrators spending their time? Presumably you've chosen the schools you have in part because the individuals there have experience in education, school administration, and in understanding the needs of children. These people aren't trying to come up with arbitrary rules to demonstrate their power, or make your life difficult, they are creating and implementing rules and procedures to make the school day run as smoothly as possible for staff and students so that your child can get the best education possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd prefer that school teachers and administrators exercise power in a rational manner and limited to the scope of their relationship with their students. So raise your hand to ask a question -- fine. That's classroom management and necessary to the enterprise of education.

Rules about what kids can't eat, where parents can't park (when they involve legal public spaces), and prohibitions regarding how books or food are transported seem overreaching. If school want to persuade parents (or kids) that these are good ways to behave, go to it. (The birthday party rules fall into this category for me -- good point; I'll voluntarily comply.) But when they impose these restrictions unilaterally and expect everyone to fall in line, that's not an example of community or consideration for others.

As I said, my DC's school doesn't have a junk food rule and if it did, it wouldn't affect us because I don't pack anything that would be considered junk food. What bugs me in this discussion is the assumption that any dictat from someone in authority at a school somehow binds both parents and kids regardless of whether it's an area over which the school should have any legitimate say.

And I don't think you foster respect for rules by telling people just to submit to stupid ones.

It's sad to me that so many in this thread are assuming that teachers and administrators are exercising power or making arbitrary rules, rather than establishing rules and procedures that will benefit students individually and the school as a whole. Parking rules may have to do with zoning issues, no peanut rules may have to do with having severely allergic children and not wanting a child to go into anaphylactic shock and having other students have to witness that, no wheeled backpacks may have to do with safety issues, as someone mentioned kids falling down stairs with them, and no candy/soda or other food rules may have to do with witnessing students who come to school with soda and candy for lunch and not much else. Yes, the administrators could take the time to explain every single one of these to you and the reasons behind them, and what they've witnessed over their years in education, but is that how you want your school administrators spending their time? Presumably you've chosen the schools you have in part because the individuals there have experience in education, school administration, and in understanding the needs of children. These people aren't trying to come up with arbitrary rules to demonstrate their power, or make your life difficult, they are creating and implementing rules and procedures to make the school day run as smoothly as possible for staff and students so that your child can get the best education possible.

Great post!!! I think this pretty much says it all. As for the wheeled backpack rule – I asked the principal this past Friday. She explained that for ES kids, they can be difficult to handle in croweded hallways and on steps. She said that over the past 2 years, the school has had over 20 student injuries related to them (mostly other kids tripping over them or someone’s foot being run over. I do not really like it because my DS is slightly built and struggles with a heavy backpack – BUT the rule makes perfect sense onve you know the rantionale behind it. In a school, sometimes the needs of the many outwiegh the needs of the individual.

[Anonymous]

Well, then why isn't the solution to say "we've had lots of problems with accidents caused by wheeled backpacks; please assess whether your child actually needs one. If not, don't bring it. If so, please teach your kid how to use the pack in crowded halls or on stairways so that s/he won't put others at risk.

Not need to sacrifice the individual to the group. Or to waste a teachable moment (good for your kid to think about what s/he is schlepping to/from/around school and whether it's necessary; good for your kid to think about how the space you take up changes depending on what you're carting and how and that it's important to watch out for others).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, then why isn't the solution to say "we've had lots of problems with accidents caused by wheeled backpacks; please assess whether your child actually needs one. If not, don't bring it. If so, please teach your kid how to use the pack in crowded halls or on stairways so that s/he won't put others at risk.

Not need to sacrifice the individual to the group. Or to waste a teachable moment (good for your kid to think about what s/he is schlepping to/from/around school and whether it's necessary; good for your kid to think about how the space you take up changes depending on what you're carting and how and that it's important to watch out for others).

In a perfect world, that works. Everyone would be reasonable and weigh the individual needs against the community's need. But if this thread is an example, everyone would look at what is best for them personally and decide accordingly.

In a school, it is better to have hard and fast rules - especially when it comes to safety. Honestly, I would expect and prefer that that principal would make decisive rules about child safety issues and not leave it up to individual parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, then why isn't the solution to say "we've had lots of problems with accidents caused by wheeled backpacks; please assess whether your child actually needs one. If not, don't bring it. If so, please teach your kid how to use the pack in crowded halls or on stairways so that s/he won't put others at risk.

Not need to sacrifice the individual to the group. Or to waste a teachable moment (good for your kid to think about what s/he is schlepping to/from/around school and whether it's necessary; good for your kid to think about how the space you take up changes depending on what you're carting and how and that it's important to watch out for others).

In a perfect world, that works. Everyone would be reasonable and weigh the individual needs against the community's need. But if this thread is an example, everyone would look at what is best for them personally and decide accordingly.

In a school, it is better to have hard and fast rules - especially when it comes to safety. Honestly, I would expect and prefer that that principal would make decisive rules about child safety issues and not leave it up to individual parents.

Nicely done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, then why isn't the solution to say "we've had lots of problems with accidents caused by wheeled backpacks; please assess whether your child actually needs one. If not, don't bring it. If so, please teach your kid how to use the pack in crowded halls or on stairways so that s/he won't put others at risk.

Not need to sacrifice the individual to the group. Or to waste a teachable moment (good for your kid to think about what s/he is schlepping to/from/around school and whether it's necessary; good for your kid to think about how the space you take up changes depending on what you're carting and how and that it's important to watch out for others).

I prefer the "no wheeled backpack rule." It's clear. Everyone knows what it means. Then the decision is not up to you.

[Anonymous]

I, for one, am very grateful for the no-makeup-at-school policy since my 6 year old needs reminding of it all the time.

[Anonymous]

I just have to say that I can't believe how many posters have said really mean things about little kids they've never met on this thread. Why are you calling them spoiled brats? Leave them out of it.....so weird.

My husband likes to sneak treats in my sons lunch box. His teacher will send me a quick email to "tell" on him....LOL! She knows he's in charge of lunch packing because I told her to keep an eye on things because he's squirly like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These rules are in place because some people really don't know about healthy eating. When I was a high school teacher, I can't tell you how many students I saw eating flaming hot cheetos and a coke for breakfast. Healthy eating habits are established at a young age. Kids that eat cheetos and coke for breakfast in high school probably ate something equally appalling in elementary school and middle school because their parents either didn't know better or weren't around to fix them a proper lunch.

My parents would never buy those thing when I was in HS, so I ate them at school. HS was all about poor nutrition. I actually eat very healthy as an adult (began in college).