do you let friends stay at your second home?

[Anonymous]

I’m really surprised at people asking friends for the cleaning fee.
To share your second home with somebody is such a gracious gesture and asking for $100 is cheap. I think most people would remember the lovely gift you gave and pay you back in some appropriate way when the time was right, with a kindness of their own. But maybe not if they felt that they had already been asked to pay you, regardless of the fact that the actual price is much higher. You are sort of devaluing your own gift to your friends. And yeah, some people won’t or can’t ever repay the favor and that has to be ok too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So strange. We invite our friends to take their families all the time. We even have a lock box on the side for our friends. We bought the house to be used. We want people to enjoy it. We don't rent it out.

We do rent it out. It's income property for us that we rely on to pay for the expenses of the house. If we didn't rent it out, we wouldn't be able to afford it.
It's not the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m really surprised at people asking friends for the cleaning fee.
To share your second home with somebody is such a gracious gesture and asking for $100 is cheap. I think most people would remember the lovely gift you gave and pay you back in some appropriate way when the time was right, with a kindness of their own. But maybe not if they felt that they had already been asked to pay you, regardless of the fact that the actual price is much higher. You are sort of devaluing your own gift to your friends. And yeah, some people won’t or can’t ever repay the favor and that has to be ok too.

This is a good point.

[Anonymous]

We let friends book direct to avoid Airbnb fees of 15%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would say no. It’s weird and entitled for them to ask, particularly if not accompanied by an offer to pay.

I agree! Extremely entitled. They had the gall to ask, and you can say no. “I’m sorry, it’s closed up for the season!”

You guys have to be the cheapest group of people I've ever seen. You have the house. You are paying for it. Will it kill you if your kindly say yes? I am so glad I have more generous friends than you. Sometimes we want to borrow things from our friends. I feel like it's the least I can do for good friends.

Sure. What do you lend to your friends?

People around her have such a strange definition of "friendship". I suppose the one with the second house is expected to pick up the tab when you go out, too? How do you think people get their second homes, by blowing their money? You seem to have an extremely tiny world view. I don't expect anyone with a second home to let me have free reign. That would be absurd and unrealistic. But I am guessing you already know that, and are on some odd campaign.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We let friends book direct to avoid Airbnb fees of 15%

So. They. Pay. Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m really surprised at people asking friends for the cleaning fee.
To share your second home with somebody is such a gracious gesture and asking for $100 is cheap. I think most people would remember the lovely gift you gave and pay you back in some appropriate way when the time was right, with a kindness of their own. But maybe not if they felt that they had already been asked to pay you, regardless of the fact that the actual price is much higher. You are sort of devaluing your own gift to your friends. And yeah, some people won’t or can’t ever repay the favor and that has to be ok too.

Do you always talk in circles?

[Anonymous]

Actually, I'm Oprah. I give everything to everyone, on demand, because why not?

GTFOH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Actually, I'm Oprah. I give everything to everyone, on demand, because why not?

GTFOH.

Actually, Oprah is very particular about whom and what she gives out of her own pocket but I get your point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really surprised at people asking friends for the cleaning fee.
To share your second home with somebody is such a gracious gesture and asking for $100 is cheap. I think most people would remember the lovely gift you gave and pay you back in some appropriate way when the time was right, with a kindness of their own. But maybe not if they felt that they had already been asked to pay you, regardless of the fact that the actual price is much higher. You are sort of devaluing your own gift to your friends. And yeah, some people won’t or can’t ever repay the favor and that has to be ok too.

This is a good point.

As a friend getting a free vacational rental, I would not want my friend to have to pay for my use so any cleaning fee I would gladly pay.

[Anonymous]

We have friends who offered to let us use one of their vacation properties in the off season, and refused to let us rent it on VRBO. We paid their cleaning fee, paid the commission that their property manager would have gotten had we rented it, and sent them a really nice gift certificate for their favorite restaurant in the vacation town. Are we takers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So strange. We invite our friends to take their families all the time. We even have a lock box on the side for our friends. We bought the house to be used. We want people to enjoy it. We don't rent it out.

This is truly a second home then, not a rental investment. There is a difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really surprised at people asking friends for the cleaning fee.
To share your second home with somebody is such a gracious gesture and asking for $100 is cheap. I think most people would remember the lovely gift you gave and pay you back in some appropriate way when the time was right, with a kindness of their own. But maybe not if they felt that they had already been asked to pay you, regardless of the fact that the actual price is much higher. You are sort of devaluing your own gift to your friends. And yeah, some people won’t or can’t ever repay the favor and that has to be ok too.

Do you always talk in circles?

Let me rephrase for your reading level: you are tacky as hell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have friends who offered to let us use one of their vacation properties in the off season, and refused to let us rent it on VRBO. We paid their cleaning fee, paid the commission that their property manager would have gotten had we rented it, and sent them a really nice gift certificate for their favorite restaurant in the vacation town. Are we takers?

No, because they "offered."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So many people on DCUM just assume that others have bad intentions, including their close friends. That's weird to me. It's clear that OP doesn't want to let her friends stay there because she perceives that they're asking for a monetary gift (which I don't see, but whatever), and will dig her heels in farther and farther any time there is pushback. So you do you, OP. I think it will be awkward this way, but you seem prepared to deal with that.

I think the friends made it awkward.

+1 Same. You can tell who does not own a second home, by their responses. For instance, cleaning fees alone, during season are about $500. (no, I won't divulge where). This may be difficult for non-owners to grasp, especially since some people are of the "Robin Hood" mindset. It beats paying full rental price, but takers don't see it that way.