Mimosas at Birthday Party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ll echo a previous poster who said they’re in NYC and that all kids parties have some kind of cocktail or wine or beer options for the parents. We truly haven’t been to a kids party without anything here. I guess people don’t drive as much here so maybe that’s a difference?

The parties we go to have a ton of food, often catered, drinks, an entertainer. The parents who judged you are the weird ones to me.

+1

Also in NYC and nobody drives to birthday parties so drinking and driving isn't a concern. Most of the birthday parties where parents stay are casual hangouts in a park - kids have some entertainment, there's cake, food, drinks. It's like a picnic, but with some extra structure for the kids and spotlight on the birthday kid. Nobody's gotten drunk at any of the parties I've been to, and plenty of parents likely aren't drinking alcohol, but it's an option and I wouldn't think twice about mimosas at an early party. I'd probably only "notice" alcohol one way or the other if it was an afternoon party and there wasn't beer being offered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, when I go to a mid day kid's bday party, and parents have to stay, I expect a beer.

Just one. But yeah, I expect it

Too bad.

I mean, I get over it pretty quick if there isn't any.

But if there is a bucket of beer, I usually think the parents are bought them for the guests to consume. And sometimes, the Dad is just waiting for someone else to partake so he can have one too. I'm happy to fill that role of "first guy at the kids party to pull from the beer cooler"

It's a kindness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, when I go to a mid day kid's bday party, and parents have to stay, I expect a beer.

Just one. But yeah, I expect it

Too bad.

I mean, I get over it pretty quick if there isn't any.

But if there is a bucket of beer, I usually think the parents are bought them for the guests to consume. And sometimes, the Dad is just waiting for someone else to partake so he can have one too. I'm happy to fill that role of "first guy at the kids party to pull from the beer cooler"

It's a kindness.

Not all heroes wear capes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, when I go to a mid day kid's bday party, and parents have to stay, I expect a beer.

Just one. But yeah, I expect it

Too bad.

I mean, I get over it pretty quick if there isn't any.

But if there is a bucket of beer, I usually think the parents bought them for the guests to consume. And sometimes, the Dad is just waiting for someone else to partake so he can have one too. I'm happy to fill that role of "first guy at the kids party to pull from the beer cooler"

It's a kindness.

Not all heroes wear capes.

It's the little things. Us Dads gotta look out for each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I would not serve alcohol at a kids bday party. It is tacky and gives the wrong impression. Save it for a more appropriate get-together.

It's hardly tacky just because you don't like it. Most It's very common in some places that are clearly different than whatever bumf@ck place you come from.

A child's birthday party is not appropriate To serving alcohol. Most birthday parties are two hours and if an adult cannot go two hours without an alcoholic drink then you have a major problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I would not serve alcohol at a kids bday party. It is tacky and gives the wrong impression. Save it for a more appropriate get-together.

It's hardly tacky just because you don't like it. Most It's very common in some places that are clearly different than whatever bumf@ck place you come from.

A child's birthday party is not appropriate To serving alcohol. Most birthday parties are two hours and if an adult cannot go two hours without an alcoholic drink then you have a major problem.

Putting up with you and your snowflake requires copious amounts of alcohol.

[Anonymous]

Oops I’ve had mimosas at a 10Am kids party before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I would not serve alcohol at a kids bday party. It is tacky and gives the wrong impression. Save it for a more appropriate get-together.

It's hardly tacky just because you don't like it. Most It's very common in some places that are clearly different than whatever bumf@ck place you come from.

A child's birthday party is not appropriate To serving alcohol. Most birthday parties are two hours and if an adult cannot go two hours without an alcoholic drink then you have a major problem.

Curious--why, in your view, isn't it appropriate? We're not talking about doing shots, drinking a large manhattan at 10am, or making alcohol any sort of central part of the event. Rather, a light alcoholic option is available to parents as they socialize.

And while I'd be curious for rationale here, I think really important to stated that offering alcohol as an option doesn't equate to someone (host or guest) "needing" alcohol. That is just an attempt to offend.

[Anonymous]

Interesting thread. My child is still a baby, so I haven’t crossed this bridge, but I would have definitely served mimosas or something like that for a morning party. The same as any time I host a festive celebration in my home. Given how poorly it is viewed by some, I guess I’ll rethink this when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

People tend not to do serve alcohol at children's parties because of the risk that a child gets their hands on booze, and then you have a liability on your hands. If we have friends with kids over, I don't serve it just because of that. Not everyone is as paranoid though. I don't think OP committed any faux pas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People tend not to do serve alcohol at children's parties because of the risk that a child gets their hands on booze, and then you have a liability on your hands. If we have friends with kids over, I don't serve it just because of that. Not everyone is as paranoid though. I don't think OP committed any faux pas.

No, most people are not particularly concerned about this risk. Out of all the people saying it’s inappropriate, how many cited this as the reason?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a similar thing OP. We did our first all-class party for my DS's 5th. It was afternoon (3-5pm) and we had juiceboxes for the kids and beer and wine for adults. No one touched the beer and wine (I think maybe one dad had a beer). Prior to this, our kids' bday parties had been with our friends and their kids of various ages so we would always have drinks, but that's definitely not the norm for these school parties. I felt a little self-conscious about it (like you!)

Thanks! Same with our friends.

You know, I bet you're right--its also just comfort level with the folks around you. I know that a lot of parents (understandably, given how judge-y everyone is) never want to do something others might look down on. So perhaps most people would have had a drink at a close friends' house, but just didn't want to be "that parent" who goes for the mimosas first

May explain the sheepish looks on the faces of those who did grab a mimosa. And the one dad who grabbed a beer.

Nail on the head. I have lived in the DMV now for going on 18 years and this is so true. People here are generally uptight and career driven at these events many are trying to figure out who the other parents are and what they do. DC has a lot of ladder climbing types, it can be a small town (especially in certain industries), and you have a lot of very high level people in visible positions where they cannot be caught doing anything compromising. There’s a lot of concern about maintaining a professional image. I mean, I joined a DC mom’s postpartum support group and quickly realized that my fellow moms were there to network and stay busy on maternity leave, not actually be (gasp!) vulnerable, open, share honestly, or discuss difficulties in the postpartum time (despite it being a group exactly for that). A lot of the women remained very tight lipped and only in one on one conversations after many months did some of them share that their life with a newborn was not the rosy life they shared on social media or in our support group. The whole experience was eye opening and also made me feel crazy because I didn’t grow up on the East Coast and in the Midwest people generally do not remain guarded for nearly so long once you get to know them. But here I have known people for years who literally never do let it down. It’s very unique to this area.

OP I think it was a nice gesture but probably better to do something like that when you know the crowd and people feel comfortable cracking a beer and day drinking without fear of judgement. Personally I know I myself hate day drinking because I then have to still care for my kids, so I rarely if ever imbibe. My suggestion for next time is to just have jugs of coffee and flavored/sparkling waters. Coffee is universally liked by parents and no one will feel judged for drinking that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People tend not to do serve alcohol at children's parties because of the risk that a child gets their hands on booze, and then you have a liability on your hands. If we have friends with kids over, I don't serve it just because of that. Not everyone is as paranoid though. I don't think OP committed any faux pas.

No, most people are not particularly concerned about this risk. Out of all the people saying it’s inappropriate, how many cited this as the reason?

This thread's replies are not representative of parents' concerns considering it's fewer than a dozen people and their socks arguing with each other.

[Anonymous]

If it was in the city where most people would walk or at least not drive, or at a block party with neighbors, I wouldn’t think it was weird. But in the suburbs where everyone is driving to and from the party, I would think it was weird. I’d keep it myself though.

[Anonymous]

Sounds better than the most recent kid’s birthday party I went to where the host busted out the Mumm and didn’t offer me any