My kid isn't getting in

[Anonymous]

OK here's the brutal truth. My kid is a 90% kid who thinks he's a 99% kid. 1500 SAT. 4.5W GPA with a solid rigor- 11 APs but not in hard science or math. He got into Scholars but not Honors at college park. Rejected from UVA. Neither outcome was unexpected, but both still hurt.

We paid for test prep. We paid for a college counselor. We paid for editors for the essay. We did not pay for private K-12. So recs were from public school teachers and administrators who are overworked and can't really glow even if they want to. We filled out a FAFSA.

He's getting rejected or deferred from everywhere (elite publics and privates) except safety schools. I know, it happens. I know we should have been prepared for this. It has to happen to someone.

And as special as my kid is, being 90th percentile in a world of 99.9th percentile can be a crappy feeling. Add to that not being full pay, not being a legacy, and not being a recruited athlete. I wish I could undo the last two years. I wish I could reset as the goal getting admitted to the state flagship and other out of state publics that offer merit aid and call it a day. That's good enough and trying to shoot for more is a dream that is largely reserved for the extra-brilliant, or the upper crust.

If I could do it over I would have him apply to Miami of Ohio and Wisconsin and Pitt and the other public schools that take a lot of kids from this area instead of all these crazy expensive private schools with much smaller classes where kids like him applying are a dime a dozen. At the time he didn't want to because he knew College Park is a better school than all these options. So he'd rather cast a wide net with the more selective private schools. But now it's coming down to the wire and it really feels like he will literally have NO choices. I am regretting his whole strategy. I just hope similar parents out there can hear this and inform their own choices.

[Anonymous]

Why can’t he just go to college park if you think it’s good?

[Anonymous]

When I say no choices I mean- his only choice is CP. It will certainly get the job done. But he is left feeling like a failure and a loser going to the only school he got into instead of someone who was wanted by multiple schools and got to pick his best fit (which would probably still be CP). It would make his 4 years in CP much better knowing it was a choice to be there.

[Anonymous]

Why not re apply but for a different degree program?

[Anonymous]

How do you know he is being rejected from all the private colleges? Sounds like he's been rejected from one school so far, and presumably he's OOS for UVA? Wait until all the decisions come in, but know that UMD is a solid option in the meantime.

[Anonymous]

Why isn't UMD a choice? Scholars is a great program.

[Anonymous]

That sucks, but he’s in good company as by definition the vast majority of students are not upper 99th percentile. What other colleges did he apply to? Any “targets” other than UMD?

[Anonymous]

You are not alone. I wish DD who is also 1500, 4.4 and has math and science APs had concentrated on the state schools and tried to get merit. Results so far --UVA, no. Defers at Georgetown and Richmond. Yes from MD, Pitt, and Penn State. All good schools. Something will work out. I wish we had gone the Alabama, SC, etc. route. Hang in there.

[Anonymous]

In absolute terms, those are way higher than 90 percent. 1500 is about 98th percentile (https://blog.prepscholar.com/sat-percentiles-and-score-rankings). 11 APs has got to be in the top 1-2 percent. (https://secure-media.collegeboard.org/digitalServices/pdf/research/2018/Number-of-Exams-Per-Student.pdf shows about 20 percent of students taking APs took 3 or more in a single year, but that's dominated by seniors. 11 means multiple APs taken in multiple years.)

Remember that your child's HS is not at all representative of the larger world.

[Anonymous]

So...there were two target schools, CP and UVA
and the rest were reaches? I mean...I guess that's what happens.

[Anonymous]

I feel you, OP. Know that the experience will make him stronger. And the UMD Scholars is a great opportunity (even if the taste it's leaving in his mouth is bitter right now).

[Anonymous]

He's been rejected from an ED, deferred from an EA that was considered a safety, rejected from MD Honors, rejected by UVA, did not receive a transcript request last month from the UC's (evidentially a telltale sign you have a rejection coming April 1), received no merit aid from a safety that in the past routinely gave kids like him 10-15K a year, received no scholarship application invitation from another school that in the past routinely gave kids like him big scholarships...I could go on. When you are not full pay there are ways you can tell if a yes is coming from a lot of the schools. Of course there are others, and there's a decent chance he gets into one or two of them, but the trend does not make that feel likely.

[Anonymous]

Not being full pay is huge. I wish Naviance separated kids into full pay or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I say no choices I mean- his only choice is CP. It will certainly get the job done. But he is left feeling like a failure and a loser going to the only school he got into instead of someone who was wanted by multiple schools and got to pick his best fit (which would probably still be CP). It would make his 4 years in CP much better knowing it was a choice to be there.

OP, sounds difficult for your DS and hope that he is able to make peace with his option before school starts in the fall. Our DS was somewhat similar, though wishing his 90 was more like his friends' 99s and that he was having to settle while they were dreaming. But even 99 kids can get caught crosswise in the process - a kid in last year's HS grad class was rejected everywhere but one Big 10 - 1580 SAT, 4.0 GPA u/w girl in most rigorous classes with great ECs. This year they have at least two classmates who are 1600 SAT, NMSF, prez scholar nominees, blah blah and have had no success through two rounds of EDs.

It is so hard to know how to roll the dice now.

[Anonymous]

I appreciate this post OP. This is so hard on kids. I’m sure they’ll all be fine but what a stressful time.