Asking a guy to be FWB

[Anonymous]

Been on a few dates with a guy that is super nice, I don’t have a very strong emotional connection tho, but the sex is amazing. I think he feels the same way but doesn’t want to hurt my feelings or say he just wants to be casual (though of course You can’t know until asked). Do men usually say yes to being a FWB or this somehow offensive to them?

[Anonymous]

If you ask him and he says no, then you and he are better off knowing now.

[Anonymous]

I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

[Anonymous]

I don't think you ask someone to be friends with benefits lol You become that through having sex with a friend without it being a relationship. Do you consider him a friend? It sounds like you'd like casual sex w/o a relationship. In that case, be clear about not wanting a relationship and continue having sex as long as you both want to and are happy with that arrangement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think you ask someone to be friends with benefits lol You become that through having sex with a friend without it being a relationship. Do you consider him a friend? It sounds like you'd like casual sex w/o a relationship. In that case, be clear about not wanting a relationship and continue having sex as long as you both want to and are happy with that arrangement.

+1
FWB means that you already had a friendship, and do not want to have dating relationship, but you do want to get laid, so you just do it. What you are suggesting is something different - just an empty sexual relationship.

BTW, before I was married, I had two woman friends who were both very nice and not bad looking, and I always wish I had tried a FWB thing with one or both. But it was hard to bring up, because the obvious question I expected is "if you find me attractive, why don't you want to date me," and I did not have a great answer.
It is too late now, but I would be curious to hear how FWB deals get started without offending anybody?

[Anonymous]

Yes but you should also offer him the booty-hole as a consolation prize in case he winds up being sad that you aren't interested in a relationship. It's just a good hedge. If he turns out to be sad about the relationship thing he'll say "oh well, but I get the booty-hole now so things aren't all bad". Best of luck OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Sorry I respectfully disagree.

I would say 💯% of men would love to hear this.
🙃

[Anonymous]

I was the FWB guy and specifically looked for women seeking that kind of relationship. You proba ly won't have a hard time with him if you ask. Then you have to set rules. Are you going to be sexually exclusive? No saying, I love you. No real dates. Do you leave after sex, or does he if it's your place?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Man here, this is the answer. Pretty much the male fantasy.

I don't want to discount that men have feelings and he may be into you more than you him, but still, given the chance to keep having sex with you knowing it won't go further, it's still a great situation to be in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Man here, this is the answer. Pretty much the male fantasy.

I don't want to discount that men have feelings and he may be into you more than you him, but still, given the chance to keep having sex with you knowing it won't go further, it's still a great situation to be in.

IME, men cannot be cool about this! They think it’s ok for them to have other partners but the minute they find out I am dating others they get jealous and freak out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Man here, this is the answer. Pretty much the male fantasy.

I don't want to discount that men have feelings and he may be into you more than you him, but still, given the chance to keep having sex with you knowing it won't go further, it's still a great situation to be in.

IME, men cannot be cool about this! They think it’s ok for them to have other partners but the minute they find out I am dating others they get jealous and freak out.

FWB implies no one is exclusive. True?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Man here, this is the answer. Pretty much the male fantasy.

I don't want to discount that men have feelings and he may be into you more than you him, but still, given the chance to keep having sex with you knowing it won't go further, it's still a great situation to be in.

IME, men cannot be cool about this! They think it’s ok for them to have other partners but the minute they find out I am dating others they get jealous and freak out.

I have been a guy FWB a few times. Why would the guy freak out? He gets to sleep with other women too.

FWB implies no one is exclusive. True?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a guy. I cannot image being offended by a women saying "hey, you are amazing in bed, can we have an FWB relationship were we both get to have awesome sex all the time but without putting in the work inherent in a relationship?"

99% of men would be happy to hear this.

Man here, this is the answer. Pretty much the male fantasy.

I don't want to discount that men have feelings and he may be into you more than you him, but still, given the chance to keep having sex with you knowing it won't go further, it's still a great situation to be in.

IME, men cannot be cool about this! They think it’s ok for them to have other partners but the minute they find out I am dating others they get jealous and freak out.

FWB implies no one is exclusive. True?

No, that is not true, IMO. FWB can be exclusive.

[Anonymous]

I'm a guy who ended a FWB situation. Was looking for a girlfriend and the situation didn't make me happy. Started dating my now wife about a month later. OP, who knows what this guy wants?

[Anonymous]

Men have their own feelings just like women. They are not a monolithic group. Ask him if he would,d be OK with that arrangement.