What Do You Do When Toddler Isn't Allowed to Go to Daycare?

[Anonymous]

Not looking to start a debate about COVID restrictions, just need practical advice. We've always had a nanny, but it looks like we can't afford one any longer. Our current nanny is changing careers, and I wasn't able to find any good candidates for what I can afford to pay. (DH and I are both in the nonprofit field).

We both work full-time and love our careers, so staying home isn't an option. I posted on local groups looking for a nanny share with no luck..so it looks like daycare is the only choice. But I just don't understand what people do when their kid gets sick (especially when they start, I hear kids are constantly getting sick). Plus COVID quarantines!

We don't have that many sick days and we actually used up most of them when we had COVID. And since our daughter is so young, we can't just put her in front of the TV while we work, she requires constant supervision. And we both have pretty intense jobs where we're on calls all day, we have teams relying on us, so we can't just not work.

How do daycare parents deal with this?

[Anonymous]

You switch off care, work in shifts and work when your kid is napping and after they go down for the night, just like everyone else.

[Anonymous]

How much did you pay your nanny?

[Anonymous]

Look for a nanny share. They’re better for both you and your child and can be less expensive than daycare.

[Anonymous]

Or... you find a very cheap nanny, that no one with more money would want to hire. This is how my disabled aunt with low-IQ was able to get by for years: nannying for lower-income but full-time workers who couldn't afford someone more cognitively with it.

[Anonymous]

OP, have you and your spouse checked to see if your jobs offer emergency childcare or reimbursement for emergency childcare as a benefit? I don’t remember the details, but I do remember this being available through at least one job that I held pre-COVID. .

[Anonymous]

Honestly you don’t get a lot of work fine.

We’ve had many weeks of sickness, covid scares, actual covid and have had preschooler and toddler home.

We switch off periodically around calls or meetings. But it’s hard to be productive as they want (NEED) your attention. It’s hard but for me it’s better than one nanny.

[Anonymous]

You muddle through. Split shift. Hire a babysitter but harder for sick days during covid. Use leave without pay. And gneerally someones job ends up taking the back seat for caretaking. But not all kids get really sick. Mine went to preschool full time at 2.5 and got 1 cold the first year. Just depends on the kid and the school and the other kids. Ours didnt allow really snotty kids in and asked for a drs note to come back after a kid had a fever or vomiting. Certainly frustrating but helped stem issues. This was way before covid.

[Anonymous]

Honestly with masks on the kids aren’t getting sick as often. Mine used to be sick every other week pre-COVID, but the youngest is in daycare now and hasn’t been out for illness a single day this year. No COVID closures or exposures. Wishing you luck!

[Anonymous]

My child has been in daycare for a year and has maybe been out four days, total, due to illness. No closures for COVID, although two of those days he had COVID symptoms and we were waiting for PCR results to send him back. So it’s not necessarily going to be terrible.

Are you in DC? Do you qualify for DC PFL?

Multiple states have instituted additional paid sick leave during COVID, not DC though.

[Anonymous]

Don't count on no sick days. My 3 year old started day care in mid-August and got six different colds by the end of the year, often with a horrible cough. Loads of COVID tests, all negative. This is in a daycare where they require masks, but the kids aren't perfect and they eat three time a day. He'd been extremely healthy until starting day care.

And they said you had to stay home with colds, so I missed a lot of work. And now he's off 10 days due to a COVID case. I'm lucky to work from home for now, so I work during naps and odd hours, let him watch a bit of tv, and take sick leave. It isn't awesome.

[Anonymous]

Now is not a good time to join a daycare. I put my child at daycare last year summer the first time at 2, no sick for 1st month, then a few days/month sick at 2nd/3rd/4th month with coughing, diarrhera fever, no sick for 5th month, then 2 plus week off for covid (my other child brought home covid).... and DH and I took off when daycare close for winter break, half day here or there.

I have accumulated 6 weeks of PTO and DH has 3 weeks of PTO. And, we don't travel, use our PTO for school/daycare closing, kids sick or other appointments.

[Anonymous]

If you’re out of sick leave you use your annual leave. And then when that runs out- LWOP. Dh and I switch off based on whose schedule is more demanding each day. So far my kid has been to daycare 7 days since December 15. Good luck!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look for a nanny share. They’re better for both you and your child and can be less expensive than daycare.

+1. Start looking for another family now and hire a great nanny. It’ll be good for your child and for you with far, far fewer illnesses and days off work. $15 per family will get you a solid nanny.

[Anonymous]

Lower your expectations and get a nanny who will accept less $$.

I'm serious. As soon as that kid goes into daycare, any leave you have is gone. You'll be using LWOP within no time at all.

True me. I have 4 kids who went through daycare. Thankfully though, back when things were more relaxed and they were allowed to be dropped off with a clear runny nose/sniffles.