Why do men try to replace their last serious ex with similar women of the same race/background/etc?

[Anonymous]

Broke up with a cheating ex of more than 5 years and even though it's rare to meet someone from my background in his area (for example, say I am an eskimo) he ended up finding someone with the same background by luck or karma and stayed with her. I have seen other men end up with women who are also similar to their last ex. Are they just seeking to quickly replace with the easiest one?

[Anonymous]

No idea. Mine replaced me with someone who looks similar, has the same hobby, same career path. We are so much alike. Kind of strange.

[Anonymous]

He has a “type.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He has a “type.”

+1 Obviously.

[Anonymous]

^^* Exactly. He probably had a type before he met you. You fit that type. Then the next person also fit that type. It’s hard to comprehend, but some people view others on a less personal and more of a functional basis. What they can do for the partner and how they can make them look to the rest of society. He might want a certain look for purposes of having children, or a certain hobby to enjoy activities together, or a certain career for wealth and prestige. The finer characteristics such as kindness and devotion may come in a distant second to all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Broke up with a cheating ex of more than 5 years and even though it's rare to meet someone from my background in his area (for example, say I am an eskimo) he ended up finding someone with the same background by luck or karma and stayed with her. I have seen other men end up with women who are also similar to their last ex. Are they just seeking to quickly replace with the easiest one?

Do you know how to build an Igloo?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He has a “type.”

+1 Obviously.

+2

Once one of my DH’s friends decided he was ready to get married, it became really clear what his type was. We met a few different versions of a particular racial mix.

[Anonymous]

Men subconsciously hate themselves for effing up their first relationship. They attempt a do-over without working on themselves and they are essentially in the same relationship as before.

[Anonymous]

Women do it too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Broke up with a cheating ex of more than 5 years and even though it's rare to meet someone from my background in his area (for example, say I am an eskimo) he ended up finding someone with the same background by luck or karma and stayed with her. I have seen other men end up with women who are also similar to their last ex. Are they just seeking to quickly replace with the easiest one?

https://www.npr.org/sections/goatsandsoda/2016/04/24/475129558/why-you-probably-shouldnt-say-eskimo

[Anonymous]

This is an unusually stupid post. Your ex did something. (You're mad now, too bad so sad.) That was him. What he did does not extrapolate to some general rule about what "men" do.

[Anonymous]

My ex cheated with a bunch of women who all looked different. But he married someone very similar to me in both looks and personality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women do it too.

They do. The difference is most men don't obsess over it, women like OP make it out to be like their ex is still in love with them that they left some sort of mark. It's been 5 years unless you all were married and had kids you should have no idea who your ex is seeing. I say this with live, op get a life!

As a previous poster pointed out he probably dated someone similar before you too.

[Anonymous]

People have presences. It's not "replacing". I prefer short brunettes. Most women I have dated are short and brunette.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ex cheated with a bunch of women who all looked different. But he married someone very similar to me in both looks and personality.

That's because it was about sex. Men can have sex with anyone who looks attractive. But, for serious relationships men and women always have a preference in appearance.